Good Morning.... Cloudy this morning.....
a little rain, and snow this morning.....
But sunshine this afternoon.......
Another storm next week....Tuesday- Wednesday.....
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Yesterday morning... snow is leaving...
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Oh, No...he's having eggs for breakfast...
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He,doesn't want eggs...wants his Tuna, thank you.....
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Seems, their eyes are bigger then their belly....
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Oh!...you wanna fight, HUH!!
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Hope she don't............
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Just as good as any were.........
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I just don't know what to say......
Kinda weird....
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Are you tired of Digging yet??
Just what I need.. I need to lost some weight...
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He's got it all dolled up.....
I bet it's a dog to wash....
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♥♥♥
~~ A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ
because of the Christmas season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of
Jesus occurred a long time ago, that He grew up, etc.
So he asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?"
Steven raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven."
Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my heart."
Little Johnny, waving his hand furiously, blurted out, "I know!
I know! He's in our bathroom!!!"
The whole class got very quiet, looked at the teacher,
and waited for a response.
The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very long
seconds.
He finally gathered his wits and asked Little Johnny how he
knew this.
And Little Johnny said, "Well...every morning, my father
gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yells
'Jesus Christ, are you still in there?'!"
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~~ Even at age 88, my mother was vain about her looks.
At a party, an old friend exclaimed,
"Edith, you haven't changed in 20 years."
"Oh," said Mom, horrified.
"I hope I didn't look like this 20 years ago."
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~~ Having been married ten years and still living in an
apartment, the wife would often complain about anything,
as she was tired of saving every penny to buy a "dream home.
Trying to placate her, the husband found a new apartment,
within their budget.
However, after the first week, she began complaining again.
Joel, she said, I don't like this place at all.
There are no curtains in the bathroom.
The neighbors can see me every time I take a bath.
Don't worry. replied her husband.
If the neighbors do see you, they'll buy curtains.
Then, the fight started.....
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~~ A spiritualist who’d recently been widowed met a
colleague and reported excitedly that she’d just received a
message from her dead husband - asking her to send him a
pack of cigarettes.
"The only thing is," she mused, "that I don’t know where to
send them."
"Why not?" asked her friend.
"Well, he didn’t actually say that he was in Heaven,
but I can’t imagine he’d be in Hell."
"Hmm," responded the friend.
"Well, maybe I shouldn’t bring this up,
but, he didn’t mention anything about including matches
in the package, did he?"
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~~ A large box was delivered on campus to one of the
boys' college dormitories one morning.
In it the boy to whom it was sent found two regular shirts,
one tee, and one pair of underwear.
"Any idea what that means?" asked his roomate.
The exuberant answer was "Yeah.
Now I can sit back and not worry about doing laundry
for two weeks."
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~~ I decided to put together one of my six-year-old son's
model kits one rainy afternoon.
I found one of a dinosaur and was looking over the pieces
when he passed by.
"What'cha doing, Dad?" he asked.
I told him I was going to put the dinosaur together,
but the instructions were missing.
"Well, Dad," he grinned, "I guess you'll just have to do it
from memory."
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~~ A man just got dumped by his girlfriend.
He was telling several friends about how it happened and
said, "When I was talking to her on the phone,
she told me something about meeting a man in Germany.
This man owns a sheep farm and is very, very rich."
Then one of the friends asked,
"You mean she dumped you for a German shepherd?"
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~~ A co-worker was beside himself.
He was expecting an important business call,
but his phone wasn't receiving incoming calls.
He phoned the technical department,
but no one answered.
So he sent this urgent email: "
Could you please give me a call; my telephone
doesn't work."
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~~ After the fall in the Garden of Eden,
Adam was walking with his sons Cain and Abel.
As they passed by the ruins of the Garden of Eden,
one of the boys asked, "Father, what's that?"
Adam replied, "Boys, that's where your mother ate us
out of house and home."
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~~ I haven't taught my kids to tell time yet.
That way, I can say it's bedtime whenever I want.
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~~ My sister's eldest boy liked nothing better then to sit
on his grandfather's knee and have stories read to him.
One day after a story about Noah's ark, and how Noah led
pairs of animals to the safety of the ark.
The little boy asked, "Grandad, you are very old, were you in
Noah's ark?"
"Gosh no...." said Grandad.
"In that case, how come you didn't drown when the flood
came?"
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Todays Thought: "Once you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change."
Rae's Trivia.... Popcorn kernels that didn’t pop are called “old maids” or “spinsters”.
Kernels that don’t contain enough moisture or have cracks
in their outer shell that allows the steam to escape will
typically become old maids.
Sniff, sniff I've cracks in my shell, does that make me an old maid? ;-)
ReplyDeleteRae x