Well, did everyone have a great Easter?
☺
Well, their on their way...took off this morning......
☺
So that's were my links went......
☺
I want it, I want it......give me....
☺
Not funny, Bubba!
☺
Ya didn't cook it enough....
☺
Cought that mouse......
☺
when an abandoned salt mine collapsed recently.
☺
He wants to dig a bigger hole??
☺
Buddha's Hand: This has to be one of the strangest looking fruits that
you can buy at the supermarket.
It's also one of the most useless when it comes to conventional usage —
this member of the citrus family has no pulp or juices; it's all skin and pith.
☺
Well, I guess I better go after this one.....
☺
♥♥♥
~~ an old man is visiting with his son at the nursing home.
He starts to lean to the left, and a nurse promptly sits him upright.
This continues for the rest of the visit, when the son asks if he'll need
anything before he leaves.
The old man responds, if you could distract the nurse for a moment,
I've had to fart for the last 2 hours.
☺
~~ Q: Why are there so many Smiths in the phone book?
A: They all have phones.
☺
~~Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large
research staff to study the problem.
☺
~~ The guy noticed the student walking up and down the street,
wearing a sandwich board that read "Free Big Mac!"
Strolling over with a look of concern, the guy asked,
"Why?.... What'd he do?"
☺
~~ Ian went to see his personnel manager.
"Could I please have this Friday off so that I can have a long weekend?"
"Why"
"Because my wife is expecting a baby." Ian replied.
"But of course you can, Ian." came the reply. "Why didn't you say so in the first place? When is the event due?"
"About nine months after I get home."
☺
~~ On vacation in Florida, the kids spent most of the time in the pool.
After a few days,they began to look for ways to irritate each other.
When two-year-old Jacob started to get in the pool with his sisters,
they told him, "No! There's a shark in here!"
Jacob pulled back from the water.
Confused, he looked around and then tried to get in again,
only to hear the same warning.
This went on for a while, and Jacob,finally gave up.
As he walked past my chair, I heard him mutter, "Get'em Shark."
☺
~~ Osama bin Laden and one of his followers were riding on a camel
when they stopped at a small town.
Bin Laden gets off the camel and lifts up its tail and looks at the camel's
butt, just then a guy comes over and says, "What are you doing?"
Osama replies, "About 2 miles back I heard someone say, 'Hey,
look at the two assholes on that camel."
☺
~~ My son Timothy was his brother's best man.
To commemorate the event, Daniel bought him a silver mug,
but the engraver made a slight mistake.
The mug read "Best man once, a bother forever."
☺
~~ The shipwrecked mariner had spent several years on a deserted
island.
Then one morning he was thrilled to see a ship offshore and a smaller
vessel pulling out toward him.
When the boat grounded on the beach, the officer in charge handed
the marooned sailor a bundle of newspapers and told him,
"The captain said to read through these and let us know if you still want
to be rescued."
☺
~~ What's the most successful pick up line ever?
Does this smell like chloroform?
☺
☺
Todays Thought: If I don't respect the garbage collector,
I should remember who made the garbage.
(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)♥(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)(ºOº)
Full of eggs, and ready to go...
ReplyDeleteHmmm hope the kids don't read this...then they will know why thier egg supply went down...I like the orange colored ones, but they need to add more orange flavoring...
Keep up the goot work...! Pete