Good Morning....Friends, and neighbors...ready for a chilly,
rainy snowy Saturday evening?  Calling 2-4 inches snow
Sunday... There go the Plums for another year...
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We could all just go hang out at Pete's..

and just stuff ourselfs....

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Pete's hired a new cook.... Sez; he's good with

Bar-B-Que's....But I don't know!!

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Stop, Teasing..... That's all you two do.....

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He's ready for the Snow, and cold.....

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No rain or snow on this guy.....

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What can I say..?

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He said he's gonna stay in the house, and stay warm...

Got plenty to eat.....

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I don't know if he's a bad dog or a good dog...

Depends on were you stand....

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Sez he's enjoying the out doors as long as he can...

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I don't think I wanna be in this house with alot of snow

On the ground....wonder if it's warm??

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Yep, that's what happens.....

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Pete's cook fixed me a ham and egg sammach.....

looks good.... hate to eat and run.....

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♥♥♥

~~ Gus and Pete was on a plane getting ready to jump. Prior to the jump, Gus asked Pete.....

"What will happen if my parachute does not come out when I pull the cord?"
Pete said, "YOU WILL BE THE FIRST ONE DOWN."

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~~ I grew up with six brothers.
That's how I learned to dance - waiting for the bathroom.

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~~ Omaha Mayor Jim Suttle went to Washington Tuesday
flush with ideas for how federal officials could help cities
like Omaha pay for multibillion-dollar sewer projects.
Among the items on his brainstorming list:
a proposal for a 10-cent federal tax on every roll of toilet
paper you buy.
..I'd like to see anyone supporting this tax wiped out.
Finally government gets to the bottom of the tax barrel.
Low flush toilets. Outlaw incandescent lights.
Now tax a good wipe...
Get rid of a load....flush Congress....

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~~ This is America.
It is my God given right to be loudly opinionated about
something I am completely ignorant of.

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~~ WARNING ..... AMISH VIRUS:
You've just received an Amish Virus.
Since we don't have electricity or computers,
you're on the honor system.
Please delete your files...... Thank thee

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~~ If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide,
is that considered a hostage situation?

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~~ Yikes! a mouse scurried across my kitchen.
I set out some poison and went to bed.
But I didn't realize I left a half-finished cup of yogurt on
the counter.
The next morning when I went to toss it away,
I noticed that tucked in the yogurt were two of the pellets
I'd left for Mr. Mouse.
I had to smile.
It was like he was saying, "You first."

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~~ I like to combine Saint Patrick's Day with Cinco de Mayo.
So I drink too much and hand out fake green cards!

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~~ I was seriously behind in the required reading for
my college courses and decided to see if the library had
a book on speed-reading that might help me.
The librarian checked the card catalogue, then the
borrowed-book cards.
She looked up dismayed.
"We have a book on improving your reading speed,
but it's out right now."
She hesitated, and then asked,
"How badly do you need it?"
I was puzzled by her question until she showed me the
sign-out card: It was full on both sides.
From the beginning of the school year the same name
appeared on every line, renewed every two weeks
for six months.
I decided the borrower needed it much more than I did.

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~~ Hospitality: making your guests feel like they're at
home, even if you wish they were.

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~~ While on vacation, my wife and I stopped for lunch at a diner.
We sat at the counter, right next to the grill.
The cook was a young man who was very busy flipping pancakes.
Every so often, he would stop and hit the grill with the handle of the spatula.
Finally I asked him facetiously, "Does that improve the taste
of the pancakes?"
"No," he replied. "That keeps the handle from falling off."

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Todays Thought:  Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.
or: You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself"
 
 
Rae's Trivia..... Lightning can give enough electricity to a light bulb to last 100 years.
 
 
 

Good morning, everyone....Ready for the weekend?
Boy!, the weather is going up and down like a yoyo...
Now we're going to have a cold weekend, even calling
for snow..... So I guess no plums again this year, as the
blooms will freeze.....
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Sunrise was pretty bleak yesterday morning...

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Hey! them eggs were for breakfast....

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Are you comfortible yet??

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Seems to be working......

cat's everywere.....

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I know.....I'm a terrible person...

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I bet that kitty hides next time.....

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Ahh, yes, the high diving pig....

Makes for lean Bacon....

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Chuck will just throw em back....

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Can't make up it's mind which way to go....

looks weird....

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I don't know about this thing....

How many pigs can it haul....??

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♥♥♥

~~ They said the radioactive plume came here today.Just be happy that something traveled 5,000 miles

across the Pacific and for once it wasn't your job.

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~~ A redneck died and went to heaven.
When he got to the pearly gate Saint Peter told him that
new rules were in effect due to the advances in education
on earth.
In order to gain admittance a prospective heavenly soul
must answer two questions:
1. Name two days of the week that begin with "T".
2. How many seconds are there in a year?
Bubba thought for a few minutes and answered...
1. The two days of the week that begin with "T" are Today
and Tomorrow.
2. There are 12 seconds in a year.
Saint Peter said, "OK, I'll buy the Today and Tomorrow,
even though it's not the answer I expected,
so your answer is correct.
But how did you get only 12 seconds in a year?"
Bubba replied, "Well, January 2nd, February 2nd,
March 2nd, etc...."Saint Peter lets him in without another word.

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~~ A man walked into a saloon and stationed himself
at the bar, saying to the bartender, "Give me a double whiskey.
I'm going to have a big fight in a little bit, and I need the
courage.
It's going to be one for the books."
The bartender served him.
The man chugged down the drink, walked over to the phone and
called his physician.
"Doc," he said, "stay in your office.
In a little bit, I'm going to have a big fight and you may get
an emergency call."
He walked back to the bar and asked for a double whiskey
with a double whiskey chaser, musing, "I need this whiskey.
It's going to be a battle royal.
There'll be blood and teeth all over the floor."
He drank the two doubles, returned to the phone,
called his physician again, and said, "Stay by the phone.
It'll be some fight."
Back at the bar, he said, "Try a triple this time.
Some fight, boy!"
The bartender asked, "Who are you going to fight with?"
The man said, "You.
I don't have money to pay for the whiskey!"

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~~ “Guilty or not guilty of begging?’ asked the magistrate.
“Nearly guilty,” said the beggar.
“What do you mean, ‘nearly’ guilty? Asked the puzzled magistrate.
“Well, your honor, I asked the lady for twenty-five cents but
I didn’t get it.”

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~~ Life Sayings from Country Folks.....
* Life is not about how fast you run, or how high you climb,
but how well you bounce.
* Don't skinny dip with snapping turtles.
* Words that soak into your ears are whispered, not yelled.
* Forgive your enemies.
It messes with their heads.
* You can catch more flies with honey than vinegar,assuming
you want to catch flies.
* It don't take a very big person to carry a grudge.
* You can't unsay a cruel thing.
* When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty.

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~~ After sailing across the Atlantic, my family and I arrived
in Spain.
Wanting directions and sorely in need of conversation,
my father stopped a passerby and asked if he spoke English.
Sizing up my disheveled father, the man warily responded,
"Sometimes."

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~~ Two psychologists meet at their twentieth college reunion.
One of them looks like he just graduated, while the other
psychologist looks old, worried and withered.
The older looking one asks the other, "What's your secret?
Listening to other people's problems every day, all day long,
for years on end, has made an old man of me."
The younger looking one replies, "Who listens?"

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~~ An on-duty policeman and another gentleman were
both interested in adopting the same dog at the ASPCA
where I work.
I told both customers that they'd have to draw for the pet.
The uniformed officer stepped back from the counter,
put his hand on his hip just above his service revolver
and with a grin drawled, "That suits me just fine."

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~~ Cards offering used textbooks for sale are posted on
the college notice board at the beginning of each semester.
One read: "Introduction to Psychology, $8, never used."
The card was signed, "Must sell."
The next day a note had been added: "Good price.
Are you sure it's never been used?"
Signed, "Prospective buyer."
Below in a different hand was: "Positive!"
Signed, "Professor who graded his exam."

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~~ I got pulled over for drunk driving the other day.

The cops had me walk that line.
I said the one thing you shouldn't say.....
I was like, 'Stop wiggling it.'
Cause that gives you away.

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~~ It's 2012 and it's the Olympics in London .
A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman want to get in,
but they Haven't got tickets.
The Scotsman picks up a manhole cover, tucks it under his
arm and Walks to the gate.
"McTavish, Scotland " he says, "Discus" and in he walks.
The Englishman picks up a length of scaffolding and slings
it over his Shoulder.
"Waddington-Smythe, England " he says,
"Pole vault" and in he walks.
The Irishman looks around and picks up a roll of barbed
wire andTucks it under his arm.
"O'Malley, Ireland ," he says, "Fencing".

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~~ When I woke up this morning
my girlfriend asked me,
'Did you sleep good?'
I said,
'No, I made a few mistakes.'

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~~ Researchers have found that 56 percent of young teens
can sleep through a smoke alarm.
Companies are now working on an alarm that sounds like
a cell phone ringtone.

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Todays Thought: Success is the ability to go from one failure to another with no loss of enthusiasm.




Rae's Trivia.... The first Mother's Day was held on May 10, 1908, and was organized by Anna Jarvis in West Virginia and Philadelphia. As the event gained popularity throughout the country, Congress designated the second Sunday in May as a national day of recognition for mothers in 1914. -

Yesterdays Trivia...  Tennessee banned the teaching of evolution in schools. Teacher John Scopes ignored the ban and was prosecuted later in what became known as "The Monkey Trial"

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Good Morning..Friends and neighbors..
Big thunder storms yesterday evening....
Foggy and 51º this morning....
Snow Saturday night??
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Gotta eat healthy this morning....

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%^$#*&$#

~~ Blogger messed it up again.......Sorry ~~

Good Morning, friends---and readers...
Kinda warm this morning..... I'm reading 53º right now...
calling for showers...
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My dwarf Plum tree is blooming already....

I hope the frost don't get to it...

Would like some plums.....

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Make you hungry...Pete??

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He said them burgers sure looks good...

He wants one.......

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Just hold on..... just a few more miles....

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Get off my puter....Dummy!!

Go to bed....

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What a sleep  position....

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You can't pass the test...Dummy....

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No...turn it on Hal.....

I wannt see him go round and round!!

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Wow...I bet.....

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Damn... I was Hoping......

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Keep comming out with better stuff...

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Well.... I'll leave you now....

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♥♥♥

~~ After a day of listening to my eighth graders exchange gossip, I decided to quote Mark Twain to them: "It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."

After considering my words, one of my students asked,
"What does it mean to remove all doubt?"

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~~ Looking over the job listings on The Home Depot
website, I noticed one with a highly peculiar job description:
"On rare occasions there may be a need to move or lift light
articles.
Examples include executive assistant, bank loan officer
and accounting clerk."

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~~ While attending an open house,
my wife was taken with the home’s modern features,
especially the central vacuum system installed within the
walls.
But she had a practical question:
"What do you do when all the walls fill up?"

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~~ Inspector and Murphy are investigating 3 dead bodies.
Murphy says "Why are they all smiling?"
Inspector says "I'll Explain"
"First one is Jamie, he won the lottery, so to celebrate, he
drank, but his drink was poisioned.
Therefore thats why he was smiling"
Number two.. This is Gus.
Gus was at a football match when his team scored,
he jumped so high, that he hit his head on a bar, and
suffered a severe head injury and died, and thats why
he was smiling"
"What about this one?" says Murphy
"Ahhh, thats Pete.
He was walking down the park when lightening struck!
Pete thought he was having his picture taken!

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~~ I went to the doctors about my persistant farting.
The Doctor examined me for a while.
He then walked out of the room and returned with a long
pole with a metal hook on the end!
In a panic, I said, "What you going to do with that?"
Doctor replied, "I'm going to open a window,
it stinks in here!"

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~~ If you sing while playing baseball, you won't get a good
pitch.

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~~ WD-40 was invented to get US president William
Howard Taft out of the white house bathtub that he was
stuck in.

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~~ I was on the bus the other day and this little boy was
running up and down.
His mother then shouted "stop that, sit down".
He replied "no"
She then said "do you want me to go to jail?!"
To which the boy said "I don't care"
The mother then said "because if you don't behave they'll
put me there"
"No they won't" he snapped back.
She then said "they will when I kill you"!!
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~~ "That's a great place to work!" shouted my
16-year-old brother after coming home from the first day at
his first job. "I get two weeks' paid vacation."
"I'm so glad," said my mother.
"Yeah," he added. "I can't wait to find out where they send
me."

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Todays Thought: "As soon as we abandon our own reason, and are content to rely upon authority,
there is no end to our troubles."
 
Rae's Trivia.... Where was Snoopy born?  In Charles Schulz's popular "Peanuts" comic strip,
Snoopy was born at the Daisy Hill Puppy Farm.

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Good Morning....Friends and Neighbors....

Springtime rains are here...

This will bring out the blooms out on the trees..

Everything will green up...

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Ham and eggs, this morning, Pete??

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Cup cakes, Cup cakes?????

No thanks, I'm full.....

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Cats are mean.....

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No, the damn cat did.....Dummy!

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Yeah....you look cute......

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Yep, your in a heap of trouble....

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I just don't know...you better be fast....

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Pete, I fixed the mirror...

An't ths a good job??

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Sit, and stay a spell... we can have coffee....

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I don't know if you can do this....Pete??

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Get the clubs out.... time to go.....

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♥♥♥

~~ My grandmother often borrowed bits and pieces of clothing from other household members' closets,

including my sister's.
One morning my sister wore her new sweater to school and
was amazed later to see Mom walking towards her when
She had a break between classes.
With a grin she explained, "You've got granny's teeth in
your pocket."

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~~ what did the grape say when elephant sat on it?
nothing, just gave a little whine.

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~~ There are seven ways to be happy:
stay out of debt and you won't need the other six.

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~~ Cynthia was excited to see her grandmom was visiting
when she arrived home from school,
and immediately began to tell her about the toys in her
classroom and the games she liked to play there.
"But what did you learn?" her grandmom asked.
Cynthia thought for a moment and then replied,
"I learned to be quiet."..... Then added, "Five times!"

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~~ Although I had arrived 20 minutes early for my one
o'clock doctor's appointment, I was still sitting in the
waiting room 1 1/2 hours later.
I had watched patient after patient disappear into the
various rooms.
Finally I got up and went to the receptionist.
"Can you tell me, please," I asked,
"if my appointment was for 1 a.m. or 1 p.m.?"

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~~ "There has been an alarming increase in the number
of things you know nothing about."

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~~ Worship brings all kinds of responses, as I observed in
church recently.
An elderly woman was standing with eyes closed and hands
raised in prayer and praise.
The three-year-old standing in the pew in front of her turned
around and gave her a high-five!

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~~ Show me a king with a sore throat...
and I'll show you a royal pain in the neck!

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~~ American cartoonist and humorist James Thurber (1894-1961)
was once approached at a party by an inebriated female
admirer who declared that she would like to have his baby.
"Surely you don't mean," Thurber replied,
"by unartificial insemination."

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~~ A young lady applying for fall semester classes.
At the end of the busy day she goes back to her dorm and
enters in a huff of anger.
"What's wrong, Shelly?" Asks her roommate.
"Well, all the acting classes are filled.
I couldn't even get into Mime class."
"Why not?"
"How should I know?
You can't get a word out of those people!"

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~~ The woman said, "When I came into the bedroom,
there was my son.
He was in high heels, putting on a bra, a dress, pearls, and earrings."
"That's not too good," the psychiatrist said.
"I know. I've told him a hundred times, stay away from your
father's things!"

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~~ In Virginia, a guy planned a heist down to the last detail.
The plan was to hold up an armored car as it made its pickup
at a bowling alley.
When the car arrived, he rushed up to the driver,
flashed a gun and screamed, "Give it up!"
The startled driver looked around inside the vehicle and finally
handed the stupid criminal a large sack.
Unfortunately, instead of holding up an armored car he had
robbed a laundry truck.
The sack contained a bunch of dirty mop heads.
Proof that criminals are not rocket scientists.

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Todays thought:  "Seize the moments of happiness, love and be loved!

That is the only reality in the world, all else is folly." - Leo Tolstoy

Rae's Trivia....Who was first to feather their cap?     The term "feather in your cap" came from the American Indian tradition of obtaining feathers for headdresses.      Birds were captured, some feathers plucked, and the birds were released.     Each feather represented an act of bravery.     The fashion of decorating hats with feathers declined in the      twentieth century because too many birds were being
slaughtered for their feathers.