Monday, December 27, 2010

Good Morning, Friends and neighbors.....
Well, the snow is over for us..
clear and windy and cold....

"Sam", Arty's Husky is disappointed.. he would have
liked to had more snow......

"Murphy" could care less either way...
He's a laidback kinda guy.....


That would kinda make you mad as ell !


Yep...they will light you up....

Gonna turn left I see......


Don't mess with the cat.....
How many times do I have to tell you?

I don't know??

Nice looking wooden car...
I wonder how it will hold up.....

Under ground garage??
I wonder if my pickup will fit?

♥♥♥

~~ Pete walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a jar.
When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed,
then Pete started to leave.
"S'cuse me," said a customer, who was puzzled over what
Pete had done.
"What was that all about?"
"Nothing," said the Pete, "my wife just sent me out for
a jar of olives."



~~ His wife had just bought a new line of expensive
cosmetics absolutely guaranteed to make her looks years
longer.
She sat in front of the mirror for what had to be hours applying
the "miracle" products.
Finally, when she was done, she turned to her husband and
said, "Honey, honestly now, what age would you say I am?"
He nodded his head in assessment, and carefully said,
"Well, judging from your skin, twenty.
Your hair, eighteen.
Your figure, twenty-five."
Feeling flattered, the wife sighed, "Oh, you're so sweet!"
To which the husband replied, "Well, hang on ...
I'm not done adding it up yet."



~~ Overheard in a doctor's office as a receptionist spoke to
an obviously hard-of-hearing patient:
"No Mrs. James, not the HEARSE, I'm sending the NURSE."



~~ Winston lost his ear in a work-related accident.
Luck would have it that it was replaced, with a pig's ear,
by doctors.
They cut it to size and made it look more human before
sewing it, invisibly, in place.
Several weeks passed before Winston felt it necessary to
return to his surgeons.
When he did, Winston complained bitterly,
'Doctor, I keep hearing this noise and its doing my head in. '
The doctor, totally unconcerned answered,
'Don't worry, its just a bit of crackling.'



~~ Sarah Palin is getting into the Christmas spirit.
Today, she shot a partridge in a pear tree.



~~ The custom of Santa eating cookies on Christmas Eve
originated in Germany where trees were decorated with fruit,
flowers, and sweet confections.
After leaving gifts for good children, he'd simply help himself
to the goodies on the tree.



~~ My busy mother sometimes accidentally left pots and
pans on the stove with the burners on, so she resorted to
posting this reminder on the kitchen door: "STOVE?"
My sister, back from college, noticed Mother's sign.
Beneath it she taped her reply: "No -- Door! Trust me.
I went to college."



~~ Flex kept going to the ophthalmic doctor because his eye
hurt and the doctor finally discovered his problem.
The doctor told him, "Your eye hurts when you drink tea,
so you can't drink tea."
Flex stuttered, "But I love tea."
The doctor replied, "Okay, as long as you take the spoon out."



~~ 'What kind of work do you do?' a woman passenger
inquired of the man traveling in her train compartment.
'I'm a Naval surgeon,' he replies.
'My word!' spluttered the woman,
'How you doctors specialize these days.'



~~ Did you hear about the gourmet who avoids

unfashionable restaurants because he doesn't want to
gain weight in the wrong places?


 * Deep Thought For The Day: "People will believe anything if you whisper it."




▼~~~~~~~~~~~▲~~~~~~~~~▼

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Good Morning.... Every one have a great Christmas??
It's nice having the family all come together...
Plenty good Cheer and food.....
Looks like Santa had some good cheer......

Yes, I got coal....I'm sad....

I don't trust you....
Vet, Monday morning..........

Oh, no....so that's were he went........

Ride yum, cowboy....err cow monkey??
Doesn't sound right......

Sleeping in, are ya??

Game of beer chest.....Pete??

This what you call "Mud Bogging"...

Yea, pretty bad!!

Well, loaded up.....ready to go...
♥♥♥

~~ Santa Claus has the right idea.      Visit people only once a year. -Victor Borge

☼ 

~~ One day a reporter assigned to cover the New York
Yankees' road trip was surprised to learn that Yogi Berra
still traveled with a beat-up old bag.
"Why don't you treat yourself to a new suitcase?" he asked.
"Why?" Yogi replied.......
"The only time I use it is when I travel."



~~ BUSINESS AD: Sheer stockings...
Designed for fancy dress, but so serviceable that lots of
women wear nothing else.



~~ The census shows there are more than 308 million
people living in America.
The amazing part is: More than half of those people are
Americans.



~~ While I was waiting to see the orthodontist,
a woman came out of his surgery smiling.
Nodding to me, she said, "Thank goodness my work is
completed.
I'm so relieved to have found a painless dentist and one
who's so gentle and understanding too."
When seated in the dentist's chair, I related the incident to him.
He laughed heartily and explained,
"Oh, that was just my Mother."



~~ Q: What does Mrs. Claus sing to Santa on his birthday?
A: "Freeze a Jolly Good Fellow!"



~~ In the early 1900s, skiers created their own terminology
to describe types of snow, including the terms "fluffy snow,"
"powder snow," and "sticky snow."
Later, the terminology expanded to include descriptive terms
such as "champagne powder," "corduroy," and "
mashed potatoes."



~~ "The best doctor in the world is the veterinarian.
He can't ask his patients what is the matter...
he's got to just know." (Will Rogers)



~~ I don't know?.. this is pretty bad....
A mother complained to her doctor about her daughter's
strange eating habits.
"All day long she lies in bed and eats yeast and car wax.
What will happen to her?"
"Eventually," said the Doctor, "she will rise and shine."



~~ One way to bring the outdoors into your house is by
installing a big window; another is by your children's shoes.



~~ Karen sent her eight-year-old son Colton to his room
for disobeying her.
He was so angry that when he got to his room,
he punched a hole through the window screen.
Hearing the noise, Karen rushed in to his room and said,
"What happened in here?
He sheepishly replied, "I ran out of temper."



Todays Thought:  The best and most beautiful things cannot be seen or touched - they must be felt with the heart ~ Helen Keller




(((((((((((((((((((O)))))))))))))))





Saturday, December 25, 2010

# 1157 Christmas Day......2010

Good Morning....and Merry Christmas morning......
Hope Santa brought all you wanted......
I got plenty coal now......
Oh, Pete I got 29º and no snow......


I caught Santa  on our deck...
Lucky I had my new camera.....

~~~~~~~

Blow dry a rabbit??
That's a Easter picture......

Wow....This guy must have been strong...

Biker Santa...?

Oh....Nooooo

Their Watching for Santa.....

Another of my picture..
"Frosty"

Kinda a lost cause......

Well, if I can get the damn car to shut up,
I'll be on my way......
♥♥♥

~~ Pete; Did you ever notice that life seems to follow certain patterns?
Like I noticed that every year around this time,
I hear Christmas music.



~~ Fifty years after graduating from high school, I started
college.
Things were progressing well until one evening I ran into
trouble while working on a geology assignment.
I had to find the square root of a number.
I vaguely recalled the complicated maneuver but finally had
to ask my high-school-age granddaughter for help.
"Do you have a calculator?" she asked.
"Of course," I said.
 "Punch the number in," she advised,
"then push the square- root button."



~~ Q: Why did the little girl change her mind about buying
her grandmother a packet of handkerchiefs for Christmas?
A: She said, "I could not work out what size her nose was."



~~ After a basketball game, the coach found a cell phone
on the gym floor.
He picked it up and handed it to one of the referees, saying
"Here's your phone."
"What makes you think it's mine?" the referee asked.
"Easy," the coach replied. "It says you missed 13 calls."



~~ Q: Why do sea-gulls fly over the sea?
A: Because if they flew over the bay they would be bagels!



~~ The people at Reynolds Co. make a substantial amount
of money selling foil during the Yuletide season.
It has been confirmed that at least 3000 tons of foil are used
to wrap turkeys annually.
Now I know why I woke up this morning wraped in foil...



~~ A funny for Taz:
When I first became a nurse, I worked on a med/surg floor
night shift.
And as most night shifters do, I became used to seeing in the
dark.
One day at about 5:30 a.m. I was hunched down at the foot of
a bed emptying a bedpan.
My sweet, little lady patient must have heard the sound of
urine flowing and saw me squatting.
She peered at me for a few seconds, then said,
" Honey, I think they have a bathroom in here somewhere."



~~ Levi Johnston reportedly has a new girlfriend in Alaska
named Sunny Oglesby.
Which raises an interesting question: Is there anyone in
Alaska with a normal human name?



~~ Pete said:
"The grocer game me a phony dollar this morning.
You can't trust anyone these days!"
"Let me see it."
"I can't. I used it at the pharmacy."



~~ A midwest farmer was describing his lifestyle to a touring
group of city folks.
"One of the benefits of this profession," he explained,
"is that we have built-in weather predictions."
"What do you mean by that?" asked one inquisitive visitor.
"When the cows are standing," the farmer explained,
"it means no rain is likely for the next twenty-four hours.
When they're lying down, it means it's going to rain."
"On our bus trip," another visitor piped in,
"I saw half the herd standing and the other half lying down.
What does this mean?"
The farmer flashed a smile and answered,
"That means half of them are wrong."



~~ I've learned that people will forget what you said,
people will forget what you did, but people will never
forget how you made them feel.



~~ We were driving the other day and passed a business
that was obviously having troubles beyond money.
Their outdoor sign in front of the building read:
$T0P $T3AL1NG 0UR L3TT3R$!








                             
                              !!!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!!!


Friday, December 24, 2010

Good Christmas Eve Morning.....
Well, now the people that put buying gifts off,
can now run around like a chicken with it's head
cut off....looking here and there...!
I got 26º and windy....no clouds yet...
Some snow tomorrow...

I wish all my great friends...
Merry Christmas
&
Happy New Year...!







You know I like old Barns...!!

A great gift.??

Get up! you got more shopping to do......


Well, time for me to leave got some shopping to do too...
♥♥♥

~~ According to researchers, laughter increases relaxation and helps calm muscle tension.

So give your body a break and enjoy Jokes & Funnies from "Down Humming bird lane".....



~~ Gus walks into a charity shop looking for a pair of trousers.
The label inside declares, "May contain traces of nuts".



~~ I was enjoying a meal at an Indian restaurant when the
waiter came up to me and said "curryokay"
So i said "Nah I'm not much of a singer"



~~ You're never too old to learn something stupid.



~~ A violent tropical storm enveloped a sailing yacht off the
southern coast of Florida lasting all night and most of the
next morning.
As the sky cleared and the seas calmed, the people on the
yacht realized they were grounded on a coral reef about a mile
from shore in shark infested waters.
Most of those aboard the yacht were badly injured from their
ordeal.
The only able bodied that were on board were a doctor, a priest,

and a lawyer.
The doctor says, "Someone is going to have to swim ashore
and get some help.
I would volunteer but most of the crew and passengers are in
pretty bad shape and I am needed here to care for them."
The priest replies, "I would volunteer to go also but I might be
needed to comfort the injured or perform last rights."
The lawyer says, "No problem."
He immediately strips off his shirt and dives into the shark
infested water.

There is a great turbulence in the water and then the doctor
and priest notice that all of the sharks have formed a double
line from the yacht to the beach allowing the lawyer to swim
between them.
"My Goodness," says the priest. "It is a miracle!"
The doctor looking at the lawyer swimming to shore says,
"No, Father, It is not a miracle, It's professional courtesy!"



~~ A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in
such a way that you will look forward to the trip.



~~ Pete had been quite the ladies man and player all his life,
but now that he was getting up there in age,
his doctor was getting concerned about him.
"Pete," advised the doctor, "I can add 15 more years to your
life if you will just quit your old routine of wine, women, and
song." Pete thought for a few minutes, then said,
"Tell you what doc, I'll settle for five more years and just give
up singing."



~~ The voices in my head may not be real,
but they have some good ideas!



~~ On his downswing, he realized that his wife, Joy,
as teeing up on the woman's tee directly in front of him.
Unable to stop his swing, he nailed it, and hit her directly in
the temple, killing her instantly.
A few days later, John got a call from the coroner regarding her
autopsy.
Coroner : "John, your wife seemed to have died from blunt
force trauma to the head.
You said you hit a golf ball and hit her in the temple,
is that correct?"
John: "Yes, sir, that's correct."
Coroner: "Well,
inexplicably I found a golf ball wedged up her a-s."
John: "Was it a Titleist 3?"
Coroner: "Yes, it was."
John: "That was my mulligan."



~~ A perfect marriage is one in which "I'm sorry"
is said just often enough.



~~ A man who was involved in a serious accident was unable
to speak when he regained consciousness.
Wishing to know how long he had been unconscious,
he took a piece of paper and a pencil from the bed stand,
wrote "Date?" on it and gave it to his nurse.
She handed it back to him...after she had replied with the word,
"Married."



Todays Thought; "Don't worry about old age--it doesn't last long." 








Thursday, December 23, 2010

Good Morning, People...
When I get up, I watch the weather on TV.
I don't know what's going on, but
The two weather sites are really different..
One just cloudy and one says snow??
Oh...and the temp. is way off..
I got 34º


Left over from last snow, but more on the way today
3-4 inches?? This one sneaked up on us....

"On the road again..."

He's a bad Dude!

Oh, No.....he must be hungry......

"Bubba", didn't find that funny.....

Run, "Clyde"...Run....catch that rabbit..

Watch out....
"Tony" the Tiger is loose!!

Okay....The Facebook dog.....

Everybody forgot about you, "Skippy"..

~~~

I don't know about "ENO"!

I'll leave on this one......Damn...
♥♥♥

~~ When i was a kid i wanted a flame thrower.

I begged my parents... I promised I'd be careful with it.
Can you believe it?..... They never got me one!



~~ Studies show that higher priced (more expensive)
placebos work better than the cheaper ones...
I guess That's because they use real sugar in them and not
cheap substitutes. ( They're Designer Placebos ?? )



~~ Ree said: Clutching my purse, car keys and letters,
I left my house in the countryside one morning to do some
errands in the city, an hour's drive away.
My last stop at the end of the hectic day was the post office.
Just as I was about to drop my letters in the mailslot,
I noticed a set of keys lying on a counter.
I handed them to a postman before leaving.
Only after I got home did I realize I had given my own set of
house keys to the postman.



~~ A man was bragging about his sister who disguised
herself as a man and joined the Marines.
"But, wait a minute," said the listener,
"She will have to dress with the boys and shower with them
too, won't she?"
"Sure," replied the man.
"Well, won't they find out?"
The man shrugged...... "Sure, but who would tell?"



~~ While preparing for his role in "Pride and Glory"
(in 2002), Mark Wahlberg bulked up by waking every
morning at 2 a.m. to wolf down several burgers and returning
to bed.
Needless to say, Wahlberg was rather peeved when he
discovered that the project had been canceled - and that
he would have to lose about 70 pounds for his next role,
as Charlie Croker, in F. Gary Gray's "The Italian Job."



~~ Question on second-grade math quiz:
"Thomas drank 1/6 of a glass of juice.
Molly drank 1/4 of a glass of juice.
Molly drank more. Explain."
My granddaughter's answer: "She was more thirsty."



~~ A friend's daughter did not like the cat.
Daughter weighed about 90 pounds.
Cat weighed about 12.
On a day like today, with fresh snow on the ground,
about 2 feet deep, daughter was standing on the back porch,
looking at the snow.
Cat came strolling by.
Daughter, feeling like playing a joke on cat, picked him up to
throw into a snow drift.
Cat hooked his claws into daughter's sweater and hung on.
This changed the center of gravity of the pair of them,
and daughter summersalted off the porch to land in the snow,
flat on her back with cat sitting on her chest.
Cat calmly hopped up onto the porch and strolled away.
Not even his feet were snowy.



~~ Q: What's round and bad-tempered?
A: A vicious circle.



~~ A speeding motorist was caught by radar from a police
helicopter in the sky.
An officer pulled him over and began to issue a traffic ticket.
"How did you know I was speeding?" the frustrated driver
asked.
The police officer pointed somberly towards the sky.
"You mean," asked the motorist,.....
"that even He is against me?"



~~ Those who think they know it all upset
those of us who do......



~~ While I was admitting an elderly gentleman to the
hospital, he told me all about how he would miss attending
his church service on the upcoming weekend.
As we were finishing up the paperwork,
a volunteer came in with some razors, toothbrushes,
combs, etc., and asked him,
"Do you need any toilet articles?"
The man quickly replied, "No ma'am, I only read the Bible"



~~ A careful driver is one who has just spotted a speed

camera.