••
♥
Just replaced the cat litter with 44 packages of
pop rocks... And now we wait.
••
A Baltimore man who police say routinely
scammed restaurants by eating and then faking
a seizure to get out of paying his bill was
sentenced Friday to five years in prison.
He referred to the scheme as “dine and thrash.”
••
If women had to be assembled, a lot of us would
probably just play with the box.
••
Wanted: Preparer of food.
Must be dependable, like the food business, and
be willing to get hands dirty.
••
Illiterate? Write today for free help.
••
Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head
illusion.
Blue Cross and salary.
••
I just learned that embalmers insert butt plugs
into corpses to prevent leakage....
So now I know why zombies walk like they do.
••
Wanted. Widower with school-age children
requires person to assume general
housekeeping duties.
Must be capable of contributing to growth of
family.
••
By my calculations, I've spent approximately
$139 throughout my life to watch bananas turn
brown on my kitchen table.
••
Did you hear about the man who was half Jewish
& half Italian?
He made himself an offer he couldn't understand.
••••
