••
♥
At Sunday School they were teaching how God
created everything, including human beings.
Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they
told him how Eve was created out of one of
Adam's ribs.
Later in the week his mother noticed him lying
down as though he were ill, and said, "Johnny
what is the matter?"
Little Johnny responded, "I have a pain in my side.
I think I'm going to have a wife."
••
A man began choking in the line at Wendys today.
Luckily the manager jumped into action and
opened another register.
••
I accidentally had two energy drinks today and
now my house is decorated for Christmas.
••
What do you call two skunks having a 69?
Odor Eaters......
••
A woman finds Aladdin's magic lamp.
She starts rubbing it and a Genie comes out as
usual.
The woman looks at the Genie and asks him to
grant her wishes:
- I want my husband to have eyes only for me.
- I want to be the only one in his life.
- I want him to sleep always by my side.
- I want that when he gets up in the morning
I'm the first thing he grabs and takes me
everywhere he goes.
The Genie turned her into a Smart Phone....!
••
I fell in love at first sight.
I should have looked twice.
••
I like doing my own thing,
except when I can get a date.
••
I just watched a documentary on marijuana.
I think all documentaries should be watched this
way.
••
Little Johnny's is coming home from the store
swinging the loaf of bread in one hand and
the other hand in his pants pocket.
Along come Priest Joe and he thinks to
himself, "This is a good opportunity to say
something from the bible to Little Johnny."
He walks up to Little Johnny and says, "I see
Little Johnny that you have the Staff of Life
in one hand.
What do you have in the other?"
Little Johnny replies, "A loaf of bread Father."
••
One of the criteria by which Miss Nude USA
was chosen in 1979 was 'taste in clothing'.....
••
When my sister teased her four-year-old
daughter by suggesting she liked a certain boy
in her kindergarten class, the little girl was
quite indignant.
"No mommy, I don't," she replied, "because
he's only interested in one thing."
Shocked, my sister cautiously asked what that
might be.
"Power Rangers, of course," said the toddler.
••••
