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♥
NBC is Launching a 24/7 Network That Will
Ignore Bad News About Obamacare
••
A Honda car breaks down on a roadside.
A BMW stops to help the driver.
"I will tow you to the next service station,
but if I drive too fast please flash your lights"
They start up slowly but only a km or so down the
line a Porsche speeds past 150km/h.
The BMW driver totally forgets about the Honda
car & guns it after the Porsche.
Just as all 3 of them tear through a speed trap,
the cop radios the HQ:
"Calling all stations, You won't believe this, I just
saw a BMW & a Porsche racing past at about 190
km/h with a Honda behind them flashing its
lights to pass."
••
It is true that love is blind but marriage is
definitely an eye-opener.
••
poem time.......
A renowned archaeologist Vern,
Who unearthed an Egyptian clay urn,
Found himself devastated
When the markings, translated,
Clearly read, "No Refill/No Return."
••
In a classified ad:
"For rent: Six room hated apartment."
••
Joe still enjoyed chasing girls when he got to be 70.
When his wife was asked if she minded, she
answered, "Why should I be upset? Dogs chase
cars, but they can't drive."
••
Sign in a hotel in Athens:
Visitors are expected to complain at the office
between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.
••
I've just released my own fragrance.
No one on the bus seems to like it though.
••
Two blokes were out walking home from work one
afternoon.
"Shit," said the first bloke, "as soon as I get home,
I'm gonna rip the wife's knickers off!"
"What's the rush?" his mate asked.
"The bloody elastic in the legs is killing me,"
the bloke replied.
••
Noah on the ark says to his wife. "I'm really bored,
I'm going to do a bit of fishing" and wanders off.
He's back half an hour later.
"I'm still bored"
His wife say's "I thought you were going to do a
bit of fishing, why stop after half an hour?"
He says "Well I only had two worms"
••
I heard there's a new reversible jacket
I can't wait to see how they turn out.
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