☛☛☛ ♥ ☚☚☚
An economist is back in his old college town
many years after graduation and decides to
drop in on one of his old professors.
He happens to see a copy of an exam sitting on
the desk so he picks it up to look at it.
Upon deciding that it looks familiar he
comments to the professor that it is the same
exam that he had taken 10 years ago.
The professor assures him that this is correct
but adds that this time the answers are different.
many years after graduation and decides to
drop in on one of his old professors.
He happens to see a copy of an exam sitting on
the desk so he picks it up to look at it.
Upon deciding that it looks familiar he
comments to the professor that it is the same
exam that he had taken 10 years ago.
The professor assures him that this is correct
but adds that this time the answers are different.
••
Obama's no man of conviction,
Avoiding truth is a lifelong affliction.
Mixes lies with the facts,
We can never relax,
To him, truth IS stranger than fiction.
Avoiding truth is a lifelong affliction.
Mixes lies with the facts,
We can never relax,
To him, truth IS stranger than fiction.
••
The hotel Astor had hired a new bus driver and
instructed him to meet all incoming trains and
announce at the depot in a very loud voice,
"Free bus to the hotel Astor!"
On the way to the station on his first trip he
kept repeating to himself, "Free bus to the hotel
Astor, Free bus to the hotel Astor," until he
memorized it letter perfect.
Upon his arrival at the station, however, he
became confused at all the noise and hub bub
and started shouting as follows.
"Free hotel at the bust your Astor, I mean, Free
ass at the Hotel Bastard, I mean, Freeze your
ass at the Hotel Buster, I mean Squeeze your
bust at the Hotel Faster, I mean, Bust your ass
at the Hotel Freezer, Oh shit...take a cab."
instructed him to meet all incoming trains and
announce at the depot in a very loud voice,
"Free bus to the hotel Astor!"
On the way to the station on his first trip he
kept repeating to himself, "Free bus to the hotel
Astor, Free bus to the hotel Astor," until he
memorized it letter perfect.
Upon his arrival at the station, however, he
became confused at all the noise and hub bub
and started shouting as follows.
"Free hotel at the bust your Astor, I mean, Free
ass at the Hotel Bastard, I mean, Freeze your
ass at the Hotel Buster, I mean Squeeze your
bust at the Hotel Faster, I mean, Bust your ass
at the Hotel Freezer, Oh shit...take a cab."
••
When Joe's wife ran away with his car, his
money and his best friend, he got so depressed
that his doctor sent him to see a psychiatrist.
Joe told the psychiatrist his troubles and said,
"Life isn't worth living.
I think I'm gonna top myself."
"Don't be stupid, Joe," said the psychiatrist.
"My wife ran off and left me too, yet I'm happy."
"How?" asked Joe.
"Easy," replied the quack.
"I threw myself into my work.
I totally submerged myself in my job and soon
forgot her.
By the way, Joe, what work do you do?"
"I clean out septic tanks." Joe replied.
money and his best friend, he got so depressed
that his doctor sent him to see a psychiatrist.
Joe told the psychiatrist his troubles and said,
"Life isn't worth living.
I think I'm gonna top myself."
"Don't be stupid, Joe," said the psychiatrist.
"My wife ran off and left me too, yet I'm happy."
"How?" asked Joe.
"Easy," replied the quack.
"I threw myself into my work.
I totally submerged myself in my job and soon
forgot her.
By the way, Joe, what work do you do?"
"I clean out septic tanks." Joe replied.
••
My neighbor took me on my first fishing trip
yesterday, we got all the tackle set up on the
riverbank and he said,
"Can you open me a can of worms?"
I said "Well, I see the milkman go into your
house most mornings just after you go to work."
Turns out he was talking about bait or
something......
yesterday, we got all the tackle set up on the
riverbank and he said,
"Can you open me a can of worms?"
I said "Well, I see the milkman go into your
house most mornings just after you go to work."
Turns out he was talking about bait or
something......
••
The Pope met with President Obama.
After the meeting, the press asked the Pope.
"Do you pray for Mr. Obama?"
The Pope replied, "No, after meeting the man,
I pray for the people."
After the meeting, the press asked the Pope.
"Do you pray for Mr. Obama?"
The Pope replied, "No, after meeting the man,
I pray for the people."
••
Did you hear about the disaster at a major U.S.
University?
The scientists were cloning monkeys and one of
them blew up.
The scientist are trying to determine what went
wrong by sifting through the Rhesus' pieces.
University?
The scientists were cloning monkeys and one of
them blew up.
The scientist are trying to determine what went
wrong by sifting through the Rhesus' pieces.
••
Paul Carthy, 25, pleaded guilty in Exeter,
England, in September to theft subsequent to
his original charge of shoplifting from a liquor
store.
In the second theft, he had stolen the magnetic
letters off the name board that was held up to
his face when his mug shot was taken.
England, in September to theft subsequent to
his original charge of shoplifting from a liquor
store.
In the second theft, he had stolen the magnetic
letters off the name board that was held up to
his face when his mug shot was taken.
••
I just came back from Wal-Mart......
I was shopping for Halloween costumes.
Problem was that every time I found a display
of a really wild costume I wanted to buy,
it turned out to be another customer...
I was shopping for Halloween costumes.
Problem was that every time I found a display
of a really wild costume I wanted to buy,
it turned out to be another customer...
••
What kind of clothes are there?
women: clean & dirty.......
Men: Clean,
women: clean & dirty.......
Men: Clean,
almost clean, sorta clean, not bad,
dirty, really dirty ,nasty , biohazard.
(Men will voluntarily wear all but the last
classification of these clothes).
dirty, really dirty ,nasty , biohazard.
(Men will voluntarily wear all but the last
classification of these clothes).
••
This Halloween I'm going to dress up as
Maury Povich and visit the hospital delivery
room telling a guy he is not the father.
Maury Povich and visit the hospital delivery
room telling a guy he is not the father.
••••
