••
♥
A little Italian grandfather comes up to
Customs.
The Customs official says, "Have you got
anything to declare?"
He thinks a second and he says,
"It's a nice-a day!"
••
Japanese couple in an argument over ways of
highly erotic sex....
Husband: Sukitaki.
Wife replies: Kowanini!
Husband says: Toka a anji rodi roumi yakoo!
Wife on her knees literally begging:
Mimi nakoundinda tinkouji!
Husband replies angrily:
Na miaou kina tim kouji!.
>>And you sit here reading this shit as if you
understand Japanese!
You are really unbelievable!
I always knew that anything on SEX would
grab your attention!
highly erotic sex....
Husband: Sukitaki.
Wife replies: Kowanini!
Husband says: Toka a anji rodi roumi yakoo!
Wife on her knees literally begging:
Mimi nakoundinda tinkouji!
Husband replies angrily:
Na miaou kina tim kouji!.
>>And you sit here reading this shit as if you
understand Japanese!
You are really unbelievable!
I always knew that anything on SEX would
grab your attention!
••
I was sitting on a bus with a friend and he told
me the following joke:
Q: What do you do if you see an Epileptic
having a fit in the bath?
A: Throw in your laundry.
The guy behind us leaned over and said,
"I think that's disgusting.
My son died in the bath while having a fit."
We both went white and apologized.
The guy got up to get off and said,
"He choked on a sock."
me the following joke:
Q: What do you do if you see an Epileptic
having a fit in the bath?
A: Throw in your laundry.
The guy behind us leaned over and said,
"I think that's disgusting.
My son died in the bath while having a fit."
We both went white and apologized.
The guy got up to get off and said,
"He choked on a sock."
••
I went to the Canary Islands on vacation this
year, didn't see one canary.
Going to the Virgin Islands next year, can't
wait.
year, didn't see one canary.
Going to the Virgin Islands next year, can't
wait.
••
I have a great diet.
You're allowed to eat anything you want, but
you must eat it with naked fat people.
You're allowed to eat anything you want, but
you must eat it with naked fat people.
••
William B. Singleton, 24, just released from jail
in Belton, Mo., on a larceny charge, allegedly
broke into a vending machine in the lobby of
the police station and stole a 60-cent Strawberry
Twisteroo while he waited for his ride to arrive.
in Belton, Mo., on a larceny charge, allegedly
broke into a vending machine in the lobby of
the police station and stole a 60-cent Strawberry
Twisteroo while he waited for his ride to arrive.
••
As the elevator car left our floor,
Big Sue caught her tits in the door;
She yelled a good deal,
But had they been real,
She'd have yelled considerably more.
Big Sue caught her tits in the door;
She yelled a good deal,
But had they been real,
She'd have yelled considerably more.
••
A minister told his congregation, "Next week
I plan to preach about the sin of lying.
To help you understand my sermon, I want
you all to read Mark 17."
The following Sunday, as he prepared to
deliver his sermon, the minister asked for a
show of hands.
He wanted to know how many had read
Mark 17.
Every hand went up.
The minister smiled and said, "Mark has only
sixteen chapters.
I will now proceed with my sermon on the sin
of lying."
I plan to preach about the sin of lying.
To help you understand my sermon, I want
you all to read Mark 17."
The following Sunday, as he prepared to
deliver his sermon, the minister asked for a
show of hands.
He wanted to know how many had read
Mark 17.
Every hand went up.
The minister smiled and said, "Mark has only
sixteen chapters.
I will now proceed with my sermon on the sin
of lying."
••
A little boy was excited about his first day at
school.
So excited in fact, that only a few minutes after
class started, he realized that he desperately
needed to go to the bathroom.
So he raised his hand politely to ask if
he could be excused.
Of course the teacher said yes, but asked him
to be quick.
Five minutes later he returned, looking more
desperate and embarrassed.
"I can't find it", he admitted.
The teacher sat him down and drew him a
little diagram to where he should go and
asked him if he will be able to find it now.
The boy looked at the diagram, said "yes"
and goes on his way.
Five minutes later he returned to the class
room and says to the teacher "I can't find it".
Frustrated, the teacher asked Jon, a boy who
has been at the school for awhile, to help him
find the bathroom.
So two fellas go together and five minutes
later they both return and sit down at their
seats.
The teacher asks Jon, "Well, did you find it?"
Jon is quick with his reply: "Oh sure, he just
had his boxer shorts on backwards"
school.
So excited in fact, that only a few minutes after
class started, he realized that he desperately
needed to go to the bathroom.
So he raised his hand politely to ask if
he could be excused.
Of course the teacher said yes, but asked him
to be quick.
Five minutes later he returned, looking more
desperate and embarrassed.
"I can't find it", he admitted.
The teacher sat him down and drew him a
little diagram to where he should go and
asked him if he will be able to find it now.
The boy looked at the diagram, said "yes"
and goes on his way.
Five minutes later he returned to the class
room and says to the teacher "I can't find it".
Frustrated, the teacher asked Jon, a boy who
has been at the school for awhile, to help him
find the bathroom.
So two fellas go together and five minutes
later they both return and sit down at their
seats.
The teacher asks Jon, "Well, did you find it?"
Jon is quick with his reply: "Oh sure, he just
had his boxer shorts on backwards"
••
I broke my arm trying to fold a bed.
It wasn't the kind that folds.....
It wasn't the kind that folds.....
••••
