Down Hummingbird Lane

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♥

 

Seen on a bumper sticker...
Cover me.
I'm changing lanes.

 

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So my sister, a natural blond graduating from
the University of North Carolina Law School,
is job hunting.
I suggested that since Microsoft is building up
their legal team, she should send them a
resume and become a southern blond
Microsoft lawyer
-- and be the butt of any joke on the internet.

 

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One of the life's mysteries is how a two pound
box of candy can make a woman gain five
pounds.

 

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My wife.....
I told she should learn how to embrace her
mistakes.
She cried and gave me a hug.

 

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My wife says that we can't use the same
babysitter again.
"Why?" I asked. "Is it because I paid her too
much?"
"No, it was the right amount" she replied,
"but you didn't have to stick the money in
her cleavage."

 

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The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda
Square, until Chuck Norris Roundhouse
kicked one of the corners off.

 

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Jury: Twelve people who determine which
client has the better lawyer.

 

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Bob had just finished his course in journalism
and joined a newspaper agency.
His boss sent him out on field to get some
exciting news.
At one place, he saw a mob gathered in a tight
circle.
He learnt that there was a fatal accident.
Bob tried to get inside the circle but could not.
He had a bright idea and shouted: “Move over,
move over, I am related to the victim.”
Immediately, the crowd made space for him.
Pleased with his own quick wit, Bob proceeded
and reached the spot and guess what?
He saw a donkey lying dead.

 

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a
trampoline?
You should take your work boots off before
you jump on a trampoline.

 

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My wife's so ugly that the local Peeping Tom
phoned her last week and asked her to shut
the curtains.

 

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