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Quick, Declare the U.S. borders a Federal Park...
I think Congress should start immediately to
declare the United States borders a federal park....
Obama will declare the park be shut down right
away, there will be a hiring boom to the
barricade manufactures, and the border would
be finally be fenced....it’s a win win win.
••
President Obama has got the government
purring like A kitten and is bored to death.
He has now joined the plight of re-Naming the
Washington Redskins Cause for Political
correctness.
Please help in this important cause and help
Mr Obama with your suggestions for A new
Name for Americas' Team... I will start...
THE WASHINGTON WAGON BURNERS
purring like A kitten and is bored to death.
He has now joined the plight of re-Naming the
Washington Redskins Cause for Political
correctness.
Please help in this important cause and help
Mr Obama with your suggestions for A new
Name for Americas' Team... I will start...
THE WASHINGTON WAGON BURNERS
••
At a recent interview, it seems that Bill Clinton
broke out in rage after being asked a line of
questions about him being controlled.
Interviewer: "Who pulls your strings, Bill?
What special interests control you?"
Clinton (visibly upset):
"You leave Hillary out of this!"
broke out in rage after being asked a line of
questions about him being controlled.
Interviewer: "Who pulls your strings, Bill?
What special interests control you?"
Clinton (visibly upset):
"You leave Hillary out of this!"
••
"The reason there are two senators for each
state is so that one can be designated driver."
state is so that one can be designated driver."
••
Before I left army basic training in Louisiana,
for my next duty station in Texas, my drill
sergeant asked me:
"Son, you know how to find Texas?"
I said "I'm not sure, drill sergeant."
"Well" he says, "you go west till you smell shit."
"Thats Oklahoma"
"Then you turn south 'til you step in it."
"That's Texas."
for my next duty station in Texas, my drill
sergeant asked me:
"Son, you know how to find Texas?"
I said "I'm not sure, drill sergeant."
"Well" he says, "you go west till you smell shit."
"Thats Oklahoma"
"Then you turn south 'til you step in it."
"That's Texas."
••
When my sister teased her four-year-old
daughter by suggesting she liked a boy in her
kindergarten class, the little girl was quite
indignant.
"No mummy, I don't" she replied, "because he's
only interested in one thing."
Shocked, my sister cautiously asked what that
might be.
"Power Rangers, of course," said the toddler.
daughter by suggesting she liked a boy in her
kindergarten class, the little girl was quite
indignant.
"No mummy, I don't" she replied, "because he's
only interested in one thing."
Shocked, my sister cautiously asked what that
might be.
"Power Rangers, of course," said the toddler.
••
"Come upstairs, son, like a good boy."
"No, Mommy, you'll only throw me down again."
"No, Mommy, you'll only throw me down again."
••
Chuck Norris once wrestled a bear, an alligator,
and a mountain lion all at once.
He won by tying them together with an anaconda.
and a mountain lion all at once.
He won by tying them together with an anaconda.
••
They say if your palm is itching you'll get money,
if your toes are itching you'll get new shoes,
if your lips are itching you'll get a kiss.
So if your private parts are itching...don't fool
yourself...go take a bath...
They say if your palm is itching you'll get money,
if your toes are itching you'll get new shoes,
if your lips are itching you'll get a kiss.
So if your private parts are itching...don't fool
yourself...go take a bath...
••
James Bond actor Daniel Craig was involved in
a minor cycling accident yesterday morning.
He was shaken ....
.... but not stirred!
a minor cycling accident yesterday morning.
He was shaken ....
.... but not stirred!
••
The owner of a small crossroads store in South
Carolina was appointed postmaster.
Over six months went by and not one piece of
mail left town.
Deeply concerned, postal authorities in
Washington wrote the postmaster to inquire why.
They received this short and simple explantion:
"The bag ain't full yet."
Carolina was appointed postmaster.
Over six months went by and not one piece of
mail left town.
Deeply concerned, postal authorities in
Washington wrote the postmaster to inquire why.
They received this short and simple explantion:
"The bag ain't full yet."
••
"What is it with men and boobs, anyway" asked
my lady friend...
"Biological, we can't help it" I said.
"But doesn't it bother you that they are so
obviously not real?"
I replied, "Santa's not real.
We still love opening his presents!"
my lady friend...
"Biological, we can't help it" I said.
"But doesn't it bother you that they are so
obviously not real?"
I replied, "Santa's not real.
We still love opening his presents!"
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