••
♥
When monkeys get mad, they crap in their hand and they
throw it.
How cool is that?
Whos going to fight a guy with a lump of crap in his hand?
throw it.
How cool is that?
Whos going to fight a guy with a lump of crap in his hand?
••
Gus's Observation On Utopia: If everyone believed in Peace,
they would immediately begin fighting over the best way to
achieve it.
they would immediately begin fighting over the best way to
achieve it.
••
Gus's Law Of Computer Support:
Troubleshooting a computer over the telephone is like having
sex through a hole in a board fence.
It can be done, but it is neither easy nor pleasant.
Troubleshooting a computer over the telephone is like having
sex through a hole in a board fence.
It can be done, but it is neither easy nor pleasant.
••
A Native American takes a trip to New York.
He gets lost and asks a traffic cop for directions.
The cop points him the way then says, ‘
And how are you enjoying our fine city?’
The Native American says, ‘It’s great.
And how are you enjoying our fine country?’
He gets lost and asks a traffic cop for directions.
The cop points him the way then says, ‘
And how are you enjoying our fine city?’
The Native American says, ‘It’s great.
And how are you enjoying our fine country?’
••
Legendary singer Dionne Warwick filed for bankruptcy,
claiming she has only $25,000 in assets but owes more than
$10 million in unpaid taxes.
She owes 400 times what she has.
She could end up serving three years........
as the White House budget director.
claiming she has only $25,000 in assets but owes more than
$10 million in unpaid taxes.
She owes 400 times what she has.
She could end up serving three years........
as the White House budget director.
••
I was late coming into work again, and the boss was furious.
She called me into her office and said, "What's your excuse
this time?"
"I'm sorry, but I overslept," I said.
"For goodness sake, at least tell me something I've not heard
before!"
I replied, "You're looking lovely today."
She called me into her office and said, "What's your excuse
this time?"
"I'm sorry, but I overslept," I said.
"For goodness sake, at least tell me something I've not heard
before!"
I replied, "You're looking lovely today."
••
Good Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Easter.
Bad Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Xmas.
Bad Idea: Finding Easter eggs on Xmas.
Granny and her grandson was shopping at Walmart when
she saw he had a toy that he shouldn't have,
she yelled at him "Hey Degree" put that back,
another lady shopping said to her, Degree is that his real name?
she said yes, she sent her daughter to the university and this is
what she came home with.
she saw he had a toy that he shouldn't have,
she yelled at him "Hey Degree" put that back,
another lady shopping said to her, Degree is that his real name?
she said yes, she sent her daughter to the university and this is
what she came home with.
••
Why is Easter an Alzheimer patient's favourite holiday?
They get to hide their own eggs.
They get to hide their own eggs.
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