Down Hummingbird Lane

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Useless knowledge;
A shrewdness of apes
A troop of baboons
A shoal of bass
A sleuth or sloth of bears
A sounder of boars
An army of caterpillars
A clowder or clutter of cats
A brood or peep of chickens
A clutch or chattering of chicks

 

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I just got a new pair of pajama pants that have
pockets; which is great, because I used to have to
hold stuff while I slept.

 

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I went to a fight the other night and a hockey
game broke out.

 

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I went to my dentist and said "Doc, my teeth are
turning yellox.
What should I do?"
He said "Wear a brown tie."

 

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BILL GATES in a restaurant.
After eating, he gave 5$ to the waiter as a tip.
The... waiter had a strange look on his face after
the tip.
Gates realized & asked.What happened?
Waiter: I'm just amazed Bcoz on the same table ur
son gave Tip Of... 500$...& u his Father, richest man
in the world Only Gave 5$...?
Gates Smiled & Replied With Meaningful words:
"He is Son of the world's richest man,
but i am the son of a wood cutter..."

 

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What do you call a fat psychic?
 A four chin teller.

 

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A couple, both bona fide rednecks, had 9 children.
They went to the doctor to see about getting the
husband 'fixed'.
The doctor gladly started the required procedure
and asked them what finally made them make the
decision.
Why after nine children would they choose to do this.
The husband replied that they had read in a recent
article that one out of every ten children being born
in the United States was Mexican, and they didn't
want to take a chance on have a Mexican baby
because neither of them could speak Spanish.

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Did you hear about the guy who found out the
secret to making women happy?
 No, neither did I.

 

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