Butter or no butter,, Eat them...
Looking for waffles......
••
♥
A prominent surgeon, who was a member of
operating teams at both St. Francis Hospital and
Christ Hospital in the Chicago area, would operate
in the morning, then field calls about his patients in
the evening.
One night, a few dinner guests were quite shocked
as the good doctor was on the phone talking to a
resident at Christ Hospital, when the other phone
rang.
His wife answered, then whispered to her husband,
"It's St. Francis calling."
He whispered back, "Tell St. Francis I'll have to call
back........ I'm talking to Christ."
operating teams at both St. Francis Hospital and
Christ Hospital in the Chicago area, would operate
in the morning, then field calls about his patients in
the evening.
One night, a few dinner guests were quite shocked
as the good doctor was on the phone talking to a
resident at Christ Hospital, when the other phone
rang.
His wife answered, then whispered to her husband,
"It's St. Francis calling."
He whispered back, "Tell St. Francis I'll have to call
back........ I'm talking to Christ."
••
Apparently, I offended my optician last week.
She saw me out in town and waved at me,
but I didn't notice her.
Well, whose fault is that?
She saw me out in town and waved at me,
but I didn't notice her.
Well, whose fault is that?
••
For Sale.....
"Nice 2-bedroom home.
The owner has noted that there are termites that
have done some damage.
Selling house 'as is.'
Don't Wait.
This Wonderful Property Will Not Last Long."
"Nice 2-bedroom home.
The owner has noted that there are termites that
have done some damage.
Selling house 'as is.'
Don't Wait.
This Wonderful Property Will Not Last Long."
••
Useless knowledge:
Crocodile eggs that are incubated below 850
Fahrenheit (29.50 Celsius) hatch into females,
while those incubated above 950 Fahrenheit
(350 Celsius) hatch into males.
Crocodile eggs that are incubated below 850
Fahrenheit (29.50 Celsius) hatch into females,
while those incubated above 950 Fahrenheit
(350 Celsius) hatch into males.
••
"People ask me where all my money went,
I tell them half of it I spent on gambling,
fast women and liquor, the other half I wasted!"
- W.C.
I tell them half of it I spent on gambling,
fast women and liquor, the other half I wasted!"
- W.C.
••
Some people are going to leave a mark on this world...
I'll probably leave a stain.
I'll probably leave a stain.
••
"Terrible day," said the Great Dane as he complained
to his master.
"Work was bad, but then I got on the bus and it was
completely packed with small dogs."
"Well," replied the master, "that's what you get for
riding during peke hours."
to his master.
"Work was bad, but then I got on the bus and it was
completely packed with small dogs."
"Well," replied the master, "that's what you get for
riding during peke hours."
••
The children were gathered on the front pew one
Sunday morning for the Children's Sermon.
The minister asked, "Does anyone know what the
resurrection is?"
One little boy blurted out, "I'm not quite sure but I
do know that if you have a resurrection that lasts
longer than four hours, you have to see a doctor."
It took about ten minutes for the congregation
to settle down enough to continue with the worship
service.
••••
Sunday morning for the Children's Sermon.
The minister asked, "Does anyone know what the
resurrection is?"
One little boy blurted out, "I'm not quite sure but I
do know that if you have a resurrection that lasts
longer than four hours, you have to see a doctor."
It took about ten minutes for the congregation
to settle down enough to continue with the worship
service.
••••
