Down Hummingbird Lane

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Hand: A singular instrument worn at the end of the
human arm and commonly thrust into somebody's
 pocket.

 

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Male Rat Experiment.....
The professor showed a large cage with a

male rat in it.
The rat was in the middle of the cage.
Then, the professor kept a piece of cake on one side
and kept a female rat on the other side.
The male rat ran towards the cake and ate it.
Then, the professor changed the cake and kept some
bread.
The male rat ran towards the bread.
 This experiment went on with the professor changing
the food every time.
And, every time, the male rat ran towards the food
item and never towards the female rat.
Professor said: This experiment shows that food is
the greatest strength and attraction.
 Then, one of the students from the back row said:
"Sir, why don't you change the female rat?
She may be his wife!

 

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Ruger is coming out with a new pistol in honor of
the United States Senate And House of Representatives.
It will be named the "Congressman."
It doesn't work and you can't fire it.

 

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I once wanted to become an atheist,
but I gave up - they have no holidays.

 

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TEACHER: Now, Simon , tell me frankly,
do you say prayers before eating?
Simon: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good
cook.

 

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Make crime pay. Become a Lawyer. ~Will Rogers

 

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Q: What is a duck's favorite TV show?
 A: The feather forecast!

 

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A fat, ugly, cross-eyed, girl came dancing up next to
me at a party.
"So, where are you from, handsome?" she smiled.
I said, "Earth, what about you?"

 

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The last place you'll find powder....is the powder
room.
Such wild illogic is to be expected from women.

 

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Passenger to air hostess:
What's your name honey?
Air hostess: Mercedes, Sir.
Passenger: Lovely name. Any relation with
Mercedes-Benz?
Air hostess: Yes sir... Same price!

 

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