☺☺
♥
A customer pulled up to my drive-through window
at the fast-food restaurant where I work and
requested something from the lunch menu.
"I’m sorry, but it’s 10:15," I told her.
"We’re only serving breakfast now."
After thinking it over, she asked,
"Do you have anything on your breakfast menu
that tastes like lunch?"
at the fast-food restaurant where I work and
requested something from the lunch menu.
"I’m sorry, but it’s 10:15," I told her.
"We’re only serving breakfast now."
After thinking it over, she asked,
"Do you have anything on your breakfast menu
that tastes like lunch?"
☺☺
The guy leered at the babe at the yacht-club,
"Hey, baby, would you help me 'raise my mast'?"
"No thanks," she said sweetly.
"I heard about you from your ex and she included
a 'small craft' warning."
"Hey, baby, would you help me 'raise my mast'?"
"No thanks," she said sweetly.
"I heard about you from your ex and she included
a 'small craft' warning."
☺☺
I was looking at the pies offered by a nearby café.
They had cherry, apple, berry, peach, and Herman’s.
"What type of pie is Herman’s?" I asked the waiter.
"Apple," he said.
"Then why is it called Herman’s pie?"
"Because Herman called in to reserve it."
They had cherry, apple, berry, peach, and Herman’s.
"What type of pie is Herman’s?" I asked the waiter.
"Apple," he said.
"Then why is it called Herman’s pie?"
"Because Herman called in to reserve it."
☺☺
Boss to employee: "Young man, you have risen very
fast in this company.
Two years ago, you began as an office boy.
In a couple of months, you were a clerk.
Then, you became a salesman, after that assistant
manager, then manager.
Now you are the vice president of the company.
What have you to say about all this?"
Employee: "Thanks, Dad".
fast in this company.
Two years ago, you began as an office boy.
In a couple of months, you were a clerk.
Then, you became a salesman, after that assistant
manager, then manager.
Now you are the vice president of the company.
What have you to say about all this?"
Employee: "Thanks, Dad".
☺☺
The Food Stamp Program, administered by the
U.S. Department of Agriculture, is proud to be
distributing this year the greatest amount of free
Meals and Food Stamps ever, to 46 million people.
Meanwhile, the National Park Service, administered
by the U.S. Department of the Interior, asks us
“Please Do Not Feed the Animals.”
Their stated reason for the policy is because
“The animals will grow dependent on handouts and
will not learn to take care of themselves.”
Thus ends today’s lesson in irony.
U.S. Department of Agriculture, is proud to be
distributing this year the greatest amount of free
Meals and Food Stamps ever, to 46 million people.
Meanwhile, the National Park Service, administered
by the U.S. Department of the Interior, asks us
“Please Do Not Feed the Animals.”
Their stated reason for the policy is because
“The animals will grow dependent on handouts and
will not learn to take care of themselves.”
Thus ends today’s lesson in irony.
☺☺
What is the best thing you got for christmas?
A mouthorgan, its the best present I've ever had.
Why?
My mum gives me extra pocket money every week
not to play it!
A mouthorgan, its the best present I've ever had.
Why?
My mum gives me extra pocket money every week
not to play it!
☺☺
Doctor, Doctor I feel like an apple."
"You will eventually get to the core of it!"
"You will eventually get to the core of it!"
☺☺
A grandfather was delivering his grandchildren to
their home one day, when a fire truck zoomed past.
Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a
Dalmatian dog.
The children started discussing the dog's duties.
"They use him to keep crowds back," said one child.
"No," said another..... "He's just for good luck.."
A third child brought the argument to a close.
"They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire
hydrants."
their home one day, when a fire truck zoomed past.
Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a
Dalmatian dog.
The children started discussing the dog's duties.
"They use him to keep crowds back," said one child.
"No," said another..... "He's just for good luck.."
A third child brought the argument to a close.
"They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire
hydrants."
☺☺
Two strands of DNA were walking down the street.
One says to the other, "Do these genes make me look
fat?
One says to the other, "Do these genes make me look
fat?
☺☺☺
