••
♥
Just had our rally against apathy...
...small crowd showed up.
...small crowd showed up.
••
When our daughter was born, we named her Myles,
after my beloved late father, despite family warning
that the name was too masculine.
Years later, when I felt she was old enough to
understand, I explained to Myles, Your name is very
special.
I named you after my own father because I loved
him very much.
I know he would be proud of you.
Myles thought carefully about this and then said,
I know all that, Mom.
But I don't understand why my grandfather had
a girl's name.
after my beloved late father, despite family warning
that the name was too masculine.
Years later, when I felt she was old enough to
understand, I explained to Myles, Your name is very
special.
I named you after my own father because I loved
him very much.
I know he would be proud of you.
Myles thought carefully about this and then said,
I know all that, Mom.
But I don't understand why my grandfather had
a girl's name.
••
If you get an email telling you that you can catch
swine 'flu from tins of ham then delete it.....
It's spam.
swine 'flu from tins of ham then delete it.....
It's spam.
••
A skinhead and his girlfriend were walking down
main street when she spotted a beautiful diamond
ring in a jewelry store window.
"Wow, I'd sure love to have that!" she said.
"No problem, baby," the skinhead said, throwing a
brick through the glass and grabbing the ring.
A few blocks later, his girlfriend was admiring a
black leather jacket in another shop window.
"What I'd give to own that!" she said.
"Sure thing, darling," the skinhead said, throwing
another brick through the window and snatching
the coat.
Finally, turning for home, they pass a Mercedes car
dealership.
"Boy, I'd do anything for one of those!" she said to
her boyfriend.
"Damn, baby!" the skinhead cried.
"Do you think I'm made of bricks?"
main street when she spotted a beautiful diamond
ring in a jewelry store window.
"Wow, I'd sure love to have that!" she said.
"No problem, baby," the skinhead said, throwing a
brick through the glass and grabbing the ring.
A few blocks later, his girlfriend was admiring a
black leather jacket in another shop window.
"What I'd give to own that!" she said.
"Sure thing, darling," the skinhead said, throwing
another brick through the window and snatching
the coat.
Finally, turning for home, they pass a Mercedes car
dealership.
"Boy, I'd do anything for one of those!" she said to
her boyfriend.
"Damn, baby!" the skinhead cried.
"Do you think I'm made of bricks?"
••
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without
holding on. - Dean Martin
holding on. - Dean Martin
••
A psychiatrist was testing the mentality of a patient.
"Do you ever hear voices without being able to tell
who is speaking or where the voices are coming from?"
asked the psychiatrist.
"As a matter of fact, I do," said the patient.
"And when does this happen?" asked the psychiatrist.
"Oh," said the patient, "when I answer the telephone."
"Do you ever hear voices without being able to tell
who is speaking or where the voices are coming from?"
asked the psychiatrist.
"As a matter of fact, I do," said the patient.
"And when does this happen?" asked the psychiatrist.
"Oh," said the patient, "when I answer the telephone."
••
Q: What's red, black and blue and lies in the gutter?
A: A brunette who's told one too many blonde jokes...
A: A brunette who's told one too many blonde jokes...
••
A blonde was summoned to court to appear as a
witness in a lawsuit.
The prosecutor opened his questioning with,
"Where were you the night of August 24th?"
"Objection!" said the defense attorney.... "Irrelevant!"
"Oh, that's okay," said the blonde from the witness
stand.
"I don't mind answering the question."
"I object!" the defense said again.
"No, really," said the blonde....... "I'll answer."
The judge ruled: "If the witness insists on answering,
there is no reason for the defense to object."
So the prosecutor repeated the question:
"Where were you the night of August 24th?"
The blonde replied brightly, "I don't know."
witness in a lawsuit.
The prosecutor opened his questioning with,
"Where were you the night of August 24th?"
"Objection!" said the defense attorney.... "Irrelevant!"
"Oh, that's okay," said the blonde from the witness
stand.
"I don't mind answering the question."
"I object!" the defense said again.
"No, really," said the blonde....... "I'll answer."
The judge ruled: "If the witness insists on answering,
there is no reason for the defense to object."
So the prosecutor repeated the question:
"Where were you the night of August 24th?"
The blonde replied brightly, "I don't know."
••
