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♥
A taxpayer received a strongly worded "second notice"
that his taxes were overdue.
Hastening to the collector's office, he paid his bill, saying
apologetically that he had overlooked the first notice.
"Oh," confided the collector with a smile, "we don't send
out first notices.
We have found that the second notices are more effective."
that his taxes were overdue.
Hastening to the collector's office, he paid his bill, saying
apologetically that he had overlooked the first notice.
"Oh," confided the collector with a smile, "we don't send
out first notices.
We have found that the second notices are more effective."
••
Driving through Oklahoma, my husband and I went out
of our way to stop at what was billed as the largest
McDonald's in the world.
However, we were less than thrilled when an employee
addressed everyone over the intercom:
"Attention, world's largest McDonald's customers."
Driving through Oklahoma, my husband and I went out
of our way to stop at what was billed as the largest
McDonald's in the world.
However, we were less than thrilled when an employee
addressed everyone over the intercom:
"Attention, world's largest McDonald's customers."
••
The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on
mental health and had proceeded to give an oral quiz to
the freshman class.
Speaking specifically about manic depression, the
instructor asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who
walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one
minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the
next?"
A young man in the rear of the room raised his hand and
answered, "A basketball coach?"
••
My parents were divorced when I was about 8 yrs old.
It was a terrible thing to go through but divorce court was
fun...
It was kind of like a game show:
My mom won a house and a car...
and Dad won luggage..
It was a terrible thing to go through but divorce court was
fun...
It was kind of like a game show:
My mom won a house and a car...
and Dad won luggage..
••
Saving is a fine thing.
Especially when your parents have done it for you.
Especially when your parents have done it for you.
••
After months of political infighting, both sides on
Capitol Hill have come to an agreement on immigration
reform.
Republicans have agreed to stop calling them illegal aliens
if Democrats will stop calling them undocumented workers.
The newly agreed upon term is Undocumented Democrats.
Capitol Hill have come to an agreement on immigration
reform.
Republicans have agreed to stop calling them illegal aliens
if Democrats will stop calling them undocumented workers.
The newly agreed upon term is Undocumented Democrats.
••
I was driving trough the small town of Paridise, California
the other day and, as I hit the city limits there was a speed
trap set up and I got a ticket for speeding.
Needless to say, I was mad....I was so mad, I didnt see the
red light I ran a bit later.
Pulled over AGAIN!!!
I guess you could say.....
Sing it with me
I got...Two tickets in Paridise!
the other day and, as I hit the city limits there was a speed
trap set up and I got a ticket for speeding.
Needless to say, I was mad....I was so mad, I didnt see the
red light I ran a bit later.
Pulled over AGAIN!!!
I guess you could say.....
Sing it with me
I got...Two tickets in Paridise!
••
When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror,
he sees no reflection.
There can be only one Chuck Norris.
he sees no reflection.
There can be only one Chuck Norris.
