Well it's Hump day....
And still Hot-Hot....
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♥
A politician was walking home from the county
courthouse the evening of Election Day when he
came upon a young boy sitting on the curb,
bawling his eyes out.
"Why are you crying?" the politician asked.
"My dad died," the boy replied.
"That's terrible, when did it happen"?
"Five years ago," the boy said.
"Five years ago? And you are still this upset"?
"It's not that," the boy said.
"It's just that my dad voted today, but he didn't
come to see me."
courthouse the evening of Election Day when he
came upon a young boy sitting on the curb,
bawling his eyes out.
"Why are you crying?" the politician asked.
"My dad died," the boy replied.
"That's terrible, when did it happen"?
"Five years ago," the boy said.
"Five years ago? And you are still this upset"?
"It's not that," the boy said.
"It's just that my dad voted today, but he didn't
come to see me."
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A pal of mine was telling me last night that his wife had
told him to go to the doctor's and get some of those tablets
that "help" men get an erection.
You should have seen her face when he came back and
tossed her some diet pills!
told him to go to the doctor's and get some of those tablets
that "help" men get an erection.
You should have seen her face when he came back and
tossed her some diet pills!
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Anybody go to the big gay pride parade over the weekend?
I like the gay pride parade.
Everybody dresses up.
Where else can you see a 300-pound guy in a cocktail dress?
I like the gay pride parade.
Everybody dresses up.
Where else can you see a 300-pound guy in a cocktail dress?
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You have done so much, with so little for so long, that you
are now qualified to do anything with nothing.
are now qualified to do anything with nothing.
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The other day I went to Office Max to get some supplies.
While there I bought a new ink cartridge for my printer.
It came in a fairly large box mounted on a card and
wrapped in plastic.
When I took it apart, which took an unnecessarily long time,
I found that the printer cartridge itself was actually quite
small.
It seems they made the packaging large to make it harder to
steal and to make the customer feel better about the high
price.
So I pointed this out to my wife and mentioned how my
weight gain over the years of our marriage should have the
same effect... It made me seem more valuable and also
made me harder for other women to steal.
She's still laughing......
While there I bought a new ink cartridge for my printer.
It came in a fairly large box mounted on a card and
wrapped in plastic.
When I took it apart, which took an unnecessarily long time,
I found that the printer cartridge itself was actually quite
small.
It seems they made the packaging large to make it harder to
steal and to make the customer feel better about the high
price.
So I pointed this out to my wife and mentioned how my
weight gain over the years of our marriage should have the
same effect... It made me seem more valuable and also
made me harder for other women to steal.
She's still laughing......
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Took a class on Cost Benefit Analysis and the book for
the class cost $400.
When I refused to buy it, the professor gave me an "A".
the class cost $400.
When I refused to buy it, the professor gave me an "A".
••
A new study says that people who snore have a higher
risk of cancer.
But the good news is: Hey, at least they're not losing any
sleep over it.
A new study says that people who snore have a higher
risk of cancer.
But the good news is: Hey, at least they're not losing any
sleep over it.
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A father found his small son looking very unhappy.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
The boy said, "I can't get along with your wife."
"What's wrong?" he asked.
The boy said, "I can't get along with your wife."
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This ugly woman came up to me at the bar last
night: "Hey lover" she cooed.
"Wow, you must be the hottest thing I've ever
seen" I said.
"Mmmm, nice" she whispered, "what makes you
think I'm so hot?"
"It looks like your face has melted."
night: "Hey lover" she cooed.
"Wow, you must be the hottest thing I've ever
seen" I said.
"Mmmm, nice" she whispered, "what makes you
think I'm so hot?"
"It looks like your face has melted."
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