Calling for a good Weekend...
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The White House softball team played the
pro-marijuana lobbyists' team and lost 25-3.
Still no word yet on which side President Obama
played for.
pro-marijuana lobbyists' team and lost 25-3.
Still no word yet on which side President Obama
played for.
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Once I saw this wino who was eating grapes,
and I said, "Dude, you have to wait".
and I said, "Dude, you have to wait".
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A very thirsty man goes into a bar.
As he waits to get the bartender's attention, a regular
sitting next to him calls out, "I'll have another
waterloo."
The bartender gives the regular a tall ice cold drink
and asks the newcomer what he would like.
The thirsty man points to the man next to him and
says, "I guess I'll have what he's having, a waterloo."
So the bartender brings the newcomer a tall ice cold
drink.
The man takes a long deep drink and calls out,
"HEY! This isn't any good. It tastes just like water!"
The regular bar patron sitting next to him says,
"It is water.
That's all I drink," He turns to the bartender and
says, "Right Lou?"
As he waits to get the bartender's attention, a regular
sitting next to him calls out, "I'll have another
waterloo."
The bartender gives the regular a tall ice cold drink
and asks the newcomer what he would like.
The thirsty man points to the man next to him and
says, "I guess I'll have what he's having, a waterloo."
So the bartender brings the newcomer a tall ice cold
drink.
The man takes a long deep drink and calls out,
"HEY! This isn't any good. It tastes just like water!"
The regular bar patron sitting next to him says,
"It is water.
That's all I drink," He turns to the bartender and
says, "Right Lou?"
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A definition of age:
Young age:
When you smoke, drink, and do heck knows what all
night through, and on the next morning still look like
you haven't been doing any of that.
Middle age:
When you smoke, drink, and do heck knows what all
night through, and on the next morning look like you
have been smoking, drinking and doing heck knows
what all night through.
Old age:
When at night you neither smoke nor drink, nor do
heck knows what, but on the next morning
nevertheless look like you have been smoking, drinking
and doing heck knows what all night through.
Young age:
When you smoke, drink, and do heck knows what all
night through, and on the next morning still look like
you haven't been doing any of that.
Middle age:
When you smoke, drink, and do heck knows what all
night through, and on the next morning look like you
have been smoking, drinking and doing heck knows
what all night through.
Old age:
When at night you neither smoke nor drink, nor do
heck knows what, but on the next morning
nevertheless look like you have been smoking, drinking
and doing heck knows what all night through.
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what is a supervisor?
a type of hat superman wears.....
a type of hat superman wears.....
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Two animals met in the forest.
One said to the other, "I'm blind what kind of animal
are you?"
The other replied "I don't know, I'm blind too."
The first animal suggested they take turns feeling and
describing each other to try to work out what they
were.
First animal: "Let's see now, you have long ears,
a fluffy tail, nice fur all over."
Second animal: "Fur, long ears, fluffy tail - why, I'm a
rabbit.
At last I know what I am.
Now it's your turn. Hmm, you're long, smooth,
slippery, and covered in diamond shapes."
First animal: "Smooth, slippery, covered in diamonds?
Oh no, I'm a televangelist!"
One said to the other, "I'm blind what kind of animal
are you?"
The other replied "I don't know, I'm blind too."
The first animal suggested they take turns feeling and
describing each other to try to work out what they
were.
First animal: "Let's see now, you have long ears,
a fluffy tail, nice fur all over."
Second animal: "Fur, long ears, fluffy tail - why, I'm a
rabbit.
At last I know what I am.
Now it's your turn. Hmm, you're long, smooth,
slippery, and covered in diamond shapes."
First animal: "Smooth, slippery, covered in diamonds?
Oh no, I'm a televangelist!"
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China is preparing to send their first woman into
outer space — which at first seems like a feminist
breakthrough until you realize she doesn't want to go.
outer space — which at first seems like a feminist
breakthrough until you realize she doesn't want to go.
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