Down Hummingbird Lane

Good Morning, friends and neighbors...
One more week until I take off on
my vacation.. 3 weeks in Fla.
So the blog will be down for that length.
Any way today we're having a  Sunny day.....
Highs in the lower 50s. Northeast winds 5 to 10 mph.
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Well, I tried to pst the pictures this morning...
But Blogger won't post pics this morning....
I tried for 45 minutes.... but no pictures...
Maybe later....
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♥♥♥

~  It was recently reported in the news that the President
 had been accidentally locked out of the White House.
For that one panicked moment Obama thought that they
must have found his real birth certificate.

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 ~ President Obama was interviewing for new accountants
 to handle the books for his Obamacare scheme.
Barack asked the first applicant, "What does one plus
one equal?"
The accountant was escorted out of the White House
after answering, "Two."
Barack then asked the next applicant,
"What does one plus one equal?"
That one answered, "What do you want it to equal?"
Obama promptly replied, "You've got the job."

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~  Cop stops woman for speeding.....
The woman trys to get out of the ticket by saying,
Officer I thought you don't write pretty women tickets.
He starts to write the ticket and says,.... We don't.

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~  I'm the kind of guy who stops the microwave
at 1 second just to feel like a bomb defuser.

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~  When questioned about the chief qualification for a
politician, Winston Churchillanswered:
" It's the ability to foretell what will happen tomorrow,
next month, and  next year, and to explain afterward
why it didn't happen."

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~  After five years of toil at a Wall Street law firm,
an associate was burning the midnight oil at his office.
 Suddenly, there was a flash of light, and a tower of
smoke burst from the floor.
Satan stepped out of the smoke, and addressed the
lawyer.
"I understand you'd give absolutely anything to make
partner," said the devil, "So I've come here to make
you an offer.
I'll make you a partner, but in return I will take the souls
of your wife, your parents, your children, your
grandchildren, and all of your friends."
 The lawyer looked strangely puzzled, and thought hard
for several minutes.
Finally, he turned to Satan and asked,
"What's the catch?"

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 ~  Only 64 more cartons and I get my FREE Marlboro
casket!

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~  A car's dashboard got it’s name from the fact that
in horse and buggy days, dashing horses kicked up mud
 on the passengers.
The dashboard was designed to protect everyone from
getting dirty.

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~  The safest way to knock a chip off someone's
shoulder is with a pat on the back.

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~  Did I tell you about the big commotion that happened
about a week before Thanksgiving?
I was in Wal-Mart and these old ladies were fumbling
through the frozen turkeys.
One woman looked at me and said “do these turkeys
get any bigger” ????
I said “ No Ma'am………… their dead”.
This covey of cackling old bats started smacking me with
their purses!

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Todays Thought:
*  Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the
freedom to make mistakes. - Mahatma Gandhi


Rae's Trivia......
In the mid 1880s, until about 1910, undertakers sold
Grave Alarm devices.
These were elaborate rope-and-bell/pulley
arrangements allowing those buried alive to summon
help.
The rope was placed into the hand of the (supposed)
deceased, and it wound through a series of tubes to the
bell outside the grave.

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