Down Hummingbird Lane

Good morning, friends and neighbors...
Well, today will be Sunny.
Highs in the mid 60s.
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~  Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Luck.
Luck who?
Luck through the keyhole and you'll find out!

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~  The worst thing about Halloween is, of course,
candy corn.
Candy corn is the only candy in the history of America
thats never been advertised.

And theres a reason --
all of the candy corn that was ever made was made
 in 1911.

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~  I am having a terrible time.. convincing my wife that
the smoke detector is not a cooking timer!

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 ~  After a very trying day at the office, a husband was
relaxing in his recliner reading the paper. 
Suddenly his wife, who was working on a crossword
puzzle, called out, "Hey, what is a female sheep called?"
"Ewe," replied her husband. 
And that is how the argument started.

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~  As a young woman approached her car in a crowded
parking lot, a policeman stopped her. 
"Your license plates are on upside down!" he said.
 "I know," she explained brightly. 
"It saves me a lot of time. 
Now I don't have to wander over the whole lot looking
for my car." 

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 ~   A man took a ride in a stunt plane. 
The pilot dove and spun, putting the plane through its
entire repertoire. 
When they landed the passenger gasped,
"Thank you for the rides!"
"That was only one ride," said the pilot. 
"I'll call it two," said the man. 
"My first and my last!"

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~  A stingy old lawyer who had been diagnosed with a
terminal illness was determined to prove wrong the
saying, "You can't take it with you."
 After much thought and consideration, the old
ambulance-chaser finally figured out how to take at
least some of his money with him when he died.
 He instructed his wife to go to the bank and withdraw
enough money to fill two pillow cases.
He then directed her to take the bags of money to the
attic and leave them directly above his bed.
His plan: When he passed away, he would reach out and
grab the bags on his way to heaven.
 Several weeks after the funeral, the deceased lawyer's
wife, up in the attic cleaning, came upon the two
forgotten pillow cases stuffed with cash.
"Oh, that darned old fool," she exclaimed.
"I knew he should have had me put the money in
the basement."

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~  When our last child moved out, my wife encouraged
me to join Big Brothers. 
I was matched with a 13-year-old named Alex.
At our first outing, we ran into his friend at the library. 
"Who's he" the friend asked Alex, pointing to me. 
"My Big Brother, Randall."
The boy looked at me, then back at Alex,
"Dude, how old is your mother?"

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 ~  A golfer was having a terrible game. 
First he sliced the ball into bushes, then into a trap,
and finally deep into the woods.
 He searched for the ball but couldn't find it. 
His caddy suggested that he give up looking. 
The golfer replied, "No way!  That's my lucky ball."

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Todays Thought:

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living;
 the world owes you nothing; it was here first.- Mark Twain

Rae's Trivia.....

In 1919, Henry Ford sued the Chicago Tribune for
libeling him in an editorial headlined,
'Ford is an Anarchist'; the jury found in his favor and
awarded him 6 cents plus trial costs.

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