Mostly cloudy today.....
A chance of showers in the morning...
then showers and thunderstorms likely in the afternoon.
Highs in the mid 80s.
South winds 5 to 10 mph. Chance of rain 70 percent.
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Yep!...It's Caturday alright....
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This one reminds me of "Pete" before he has his
Coffee.....
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They got burgers on they mind.....
Wouldn't make good Mousers....
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Well, I don't know about that......
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Yep, this is what kittens smell like....
Now you know........
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You gotta wear Armor??
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I don't blame ya...
Now you know why I won't ride with Her...
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Cute now, but you just wait......
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Don't you hurt that baby.....
I don't care if it is a pig.....
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Yeah, you did a good job, too......
Somebody is going to be tied outside...
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Yep, Men are Cruel...
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Well, time to go, if I can call a cab......
I have a hard time punching the number in...
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♥♥♥
~ Collection Of Insults .....
Traveling faster than light, but left his sneakers behind.Traveling without a passport.
Trips over cordless phones.
Truck can't haul a full load.
Two bits shy of a word/dollar.
Two chapters short of a novel.
Two degrees off square.
Two saucers short of a tea-service.
Two sheep short of a sweater.
Types 120 words a minute but her keyboard isn't
plugged in.
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~ A man is at work one day when he notices that his
co-worker is wearing an earring. This man knows his co-worker to be a normally,
conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden
change in fashion sense.
The man walks up to him and says, I didn't know you
were into earring.
Don't make a big deal, it's only an earring, he replies
sheepishly.
His friend falls silent for a few minutes, but then his
curiosity prods him to say, So, how long have you been
wearing one?
Ever since my wife found it in my truck.
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~ "Ever since we got married, my wife has tried to
change me. She got me to stop drinking, smoking and running
around until all hours of the night.
She taught me how to dress well, enjoy the fine arts,
gourmet cooking, classical music, even how to invest
in the stock market."
"Sounds like you may be bitter because she changed
you so drastically," remarked his friend.
"I'm not bitter. Now that I'm so improved,
she just isn't good enough for me."
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~ A gentleman entered a busy florist shop that
displayed a large sign that read "Say It With Flowers.""Wrap up one rose," he told the florist.
"Only one?" the florist asked.
"Just one," the customer replied......
"I'm a man of few words."
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~ It was a terrible night, blowing cold and rain in a
most frightful manner. The streets were deserted and the local baker was just
about to close up shop when a little man slipped through
the door.
He carried an umbrella, blown inside out, and was
bundled in two sweaters and a thick coat.
But even so he still looked wet and bedraggled.
As he unwound his scarf he said to the baker,
"May I have two bagels to go, please?"
The baker in astonishment, "Two bagels?
Nothing more?"
"That's right," answered the little man.
"One for me and one for Gladys."
"Gladys is your wife?" asked the baker.
"What do you think, " snapped the little man,
"my mother would send me out on a night like this?"
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~ Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot!"
Sam : "It's a family tradition". Teacher : "What do you mean?"
Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker,
my father is a teacher".
Teacher : "What about your mother?"
Sam : "She's a woman".
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~ A 3rd-grade girl came home from school.
She was very happy, and her Mom noticed this. Mom asked, "What makes you so happy today?"
The girl said, "Mom, we learned how to make babies in
school today!"
Thinking that 3rd grade was a bit early for that,
she asked her daughter to tell her how.
"It's easy, Mom... you just drop the 'Y', and add 'I-E-S',
" the daughter said.
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~ Why is it when people ask you "what three things
would you bring with you on a deserted island?" , no one ever replies, "A BOAT...?
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* The children had all been photographed, and the
teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy
of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are
all grown up and say,
'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael,
He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the classroom rang out,
"And there's the teacher, she's dead."
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* If you suffered from kleptomania,
should you take something for it?
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Today's Thought;
In life, all good things come hard, but wisdom is the
hardest to come by. - Lucille Ball
( Today is Lucille's 100Th's birthday.)
Happy Birthday!!
Thanks for the years of entainment....
Rae's Trivia.....
In France, Napoleon instituted a scale of fines for sex
offenses that included 35 francs for a man guilty of lifting a woman’s skirt to the knee and 75 francs if he
lifted it to the thigh.
(How much to take it off?)
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