Down Hummingbird Lane

Good Morning, everyone...

Were having some great weather....I'm reading 60º

In the 80's today.....Partly cloudy....

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The cook is getting breakfast ready...

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Not breakfast, but looks good....

this morning....

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I hate to tell you this...

Not my beer... I no gots any....

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I don't know....you look serious, but I don't think you are....

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What! your not going to let me play wif it....

I'm going home.....

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Just won the title of "worlds Ugliest dog"...

I think there were some more uglier..

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Another contestant and his dog.....

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No, I'm not playing Basket ball wif a frog...

They jump around too much....

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Still looks like a kitty......

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Yes, I know....

plenty naps, plenty to eat......

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Well, time to get outt here, I see a unicorn crossing the street....

I'll get him.........

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♥♥♥

*  A man being mugged by two thugs put up a

tremendous fight!
Finally, the thugs subdued him and took his wallet.
Upon finding only two dollars in the wallet, the surprised
 thug said "Why did you put up such a fight?"
To which the man promptly replied
"I was afraid that you would find the $200 hidden in
my shoe!"

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*  A bar owner locked up his place at 2 AM and went

home to sleep.
He had been in bed only a few minutes when the phone
rang.
What time do you open up in the morning?
He heard an obviously inebriated man inquire.
 The owner was so furious, he slammed down the
receiver and went back to bed.
A few minutes later there was another call and he heard
the same voice ask the same question.
Listen, the owner shouted, there's no sense in asking
me what time I open because I wouldn't let a person in
your condition in....
"I don't want to get in, the caller interjected.
I want to get out".

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*  Some kids play Kick the can.

Chuck Norris played Kick the keg.

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*  These two guys were approaching the first tee.

The first guy goes into his golf bag to get a ball and says
 to his friend, "Hey, why don't you try this ball?"
 He draws a green golf ball out of his bag.
"You can't lose it."
His friend replies, "What do you mean you can't lose it?!"
The first man replies, "I'm serious, you can't lose it.
If you hit it into the woods, it makes a beeping sound,
if you hit it into the water it produces bubbles, and if
you hit it on the fairway, smoke comes up in order for
you to find it."
 Obviously, his friend doesn't believe him, but he shows
him all the possibilities until he is convinced.
The friend says, "Wow! That's incredible!
Where did you get that ball?!"
 The man replies, "I found it."

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*  I quit drinking and took up showering:

I’m clean and soapier.

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*  Jan said:  I was at a party, and this guy was hitting on

me, and he's hitting on me with the most boring
questions.
One of them was, If you could go anywhere in the world,
where would you go?
And I was like, Anywhere?
He was like, Anywhere.
I was like, Uh -- to the other side of the room.
Now, please, get out of the way of a woman and her
dream.

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* Application to college....

Please answer these Questions as accurate as you can...
1. Are your parents rich?
2. Do you hate the Fox News Network?
3. If you are only 17, do you have have a really cool fake
I.D.?
4. Do you have a problem with long haired Balding
Professors that want to hump you?
 5. Do you like "Extra credit!!!"
6. Isnt Keith Oberman the coolest!!!
7. If you want to graduate early,
The networks are hiring anchors..
And in closing..

trust all older men if they got a bow tie....

They got money, and will save you the effort

of you having to go down and vote.

Hell, They will help your dog vote,

if he is incapapacited, or dead...

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*  There was once a snail who was sick and tired of his

reputation for being so slow.
He decided to get some fast wheels to make up the
difference.
 After shopping around a while, he decided that the
Datson 240-Z was the car to get.
So the snail goes to the nearest Datsun dealer and says
he wants to buy the 240-Z, but he wants it repainted
"240-S".
 The dealer asks, "Why 'S'?"
The snail replies, "'S' stands for snail.
 I want everybody who sees me roaring past to know
who's driving."
 Well, the dealer doesn't want to lose the unique
opportunity to sell a car to a snail, so he agrees to have
the car repainted for a small fee.
 The snail gets his new car and spent the rest of his days
roaring happily down the highway at top speed.
And whenever anyone would see him zooming by,
they'd say "Wow! Look at that S-car go!"

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 ~ What a night.
Dude: I wasn't that drunk!
Friend: Dude, you were walking around with a bucket
on head saying "LUKE... I am your father..."

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~ shot my first deer today!!!

the petting zoo owner was pissed!

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Todays thought:

 "Sometimes our flame goes out, but is blown again

into instant flame by an encounter with another human
being." - Albert Schweitzer

Rae's Trivia.....

The word trivia derives from the Latin tri + via,

which translates as "three streets."
As a major public service in Roman times, at the
intersection of three streets, there was a kind of kiosk
where further info was posted for travelers.
Apparently these data were so useless that citizens
often ignored them entirely: thus, they were truly bits
of "trivia."