Good morning, Readers... Chilly Morning here....
I'm reading 30º... And calling for cold rain tomorrow..
and 50% on Tuesday and Friday....
What Happened to Spring....Pete??
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Carol's latest painting....
It's a great painting...some talent there!!
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"Granny's' Tulip Poplar tree....
Was pretty until the cold got to it....
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Steak for breakfast...this morning.... Pete...??
No eggs?
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He wants just the Stake......
I think he heard wrong.....!
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My yard is full of these critters...
They love to tease the cats....
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And steal my coffee......
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Ground squirrel spider??
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Your lucky...could be a damn Squirrel...
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"Can you Hear me Now??
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Well, I gotta go....my programs on.....
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♥♥♥
~~ One Sunday morning a priest wakes up and decides to go golfing.
He calls his boss and says that he feels very sick, and won't be able to go to work. Way up in heaven, Saint Peter sees all this and asks God, "Are you really going to let him get away with this?" "No, I guess not," says God. The priest drives about five to six hours away, so he doesn't bump into anyone he knows. The golf course is empty when he gets there. So he takes his first swing, drives the ball 495 yards away and gets a hole in one. Saint Peter watches in disbelief and asks,
"Why did you let him do that?" To this God says, "Who's he going to tell?"
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~~ As a group of soldiers stood in formation at an Army
Base, the Drill Sergeant said, "All right! All you idiots fall out."
As the rest of the squad wandered away, one soldier
remained at attention.
The Drill Instructor walked over until he was eye-to-eye
with him, and then raised a single eyebrow.
The soldier smiled and said, "Sure was a lot of 'em, huh, sir?"
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~~ Two passenger planes landed in Washington, D.C.
with no assistance from a sleeping air traffic controller.
Luckily, the pilots were too drunk to notice.
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~~ A guy is out around town when his cell phone rings,
and the caller ID says "Home".
He is confused, being a bachelor, as to who is in his home
calling him.
He answers, and it is his pet cat on the other line.
The cat says, "Can you hear meow?"
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~~ As a volunteer in my son's second grade class,
I was listening to one young fellow read.
The book he had chosen had several sentences with colons,
and he read those lines twice.
Finally I explained that he only had to read them once.
"You see those dots there?" he said.
"They're repeat dots, and my music teacher says you have
to do the line twice."
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~~ A family was having dinner, which included some
Swiss Cheese.
The little boy said, "Dad I don't like the holes in the
cheese!"
"Well son, eat the cheese and leave the holes on the
side of the plate."
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~~ In the summer of 2002, a six-man team led by
Cornell University ornithologist John Fitzpatrick went
on a month-long trek through marshland in Louisiana
to make a recording of what was thought to be one of
the world's rarest woodpeckers tapping in a distant
tree trunk.
(A pair of the birds had apparently been spotted by a
university student while he was turkey hunting in a
Louisiana swamp.)
When the team did not see any first-hand evidence of
the bird, they passed their tapes on to another team of
sound experts.
The verdict?.....
"Sadly," they reported, "analysis proved the sounds
were distant gunshots, with reverberations that sounded
to human ears like drumming on a hollow snag."
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~~ Helping me sort clothes into "save" and
"give away" piles, my six- year-old daughter came
across a garter belt. "What’s this?" she asked.
"It’s a garter belt," I said.
Seeing that meant nothing to her, I added,
"It’s for holding up stockings."
"Ah," she said, carefully placing it in the "save" pile,
"we’ll use it Christmas Eve."
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~~ Frustrated at my attempts to find something
suitable for my diminutive daughter to wear that didn't
look like something for a child,
I approached a rather harried-looking saleswoman.
"What do you have for a petite woman about five feet tall,
around 95 to 100 pounds?" I asked.
The short, pleasantly plump clerk looked at me with
a rueful smile... "Nothing but contempt," she said.
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~~ A girl looked calmly at a caller one evening and
remarked:
"George, as it is leap year—"
The caller turned pale.
"As it is leap year," she continued, "and you've been
calling regularly now four nights a week for a long,
Long time, George, I propose—"
"I'm not in a position to marry on my salary Grace"
George interrupted hurriedly.
"I know that, George," the girl pursued, "and so, as it is
leap year, I thought I'd propose that you lay off and give
some of the more eligible fellows a chance."
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Todays Thought: "When you feel good about yourself, others will feel good about you, too."
Rae's Trivia..... Where is Stonewall buried?
Civil War General Thomas Jonathan "Stonewall" Jackson has two separate burial sites.
His left arm, which was amputated after the battle of Chancellorsville, was buried on a nearby farm.
A week later, Jackson died and was buried in Lexington, Virginia. (His own men Shot him by
mistake....)
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