Good Morning...everyone...
I can't believe the weather...
rain this morning, then warm and windy this afternoon.
I have 40º now, but they say 60º this afternoon..
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Carol..as soon as I open my door in the morning,
"Sadie" takes over....
She wants to be boss....
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The fishies are ready for breakfast in the
Froggy pond....
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He wants the real thing.....
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Now, we're talking....I'm ready for a couple...
Petewete...want a couple¿
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This guy looks like he's had too many hot dogs already...
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This guy is smelling them hot dogs....
Lookin for a way in...
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Staring each other down.....
Who will win..¿¿
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I guess there learn about them mouses...
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Don't seem right... But I guss you shouldn't take a parking space.
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Eno, gets me to laffing...
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Well, my rides here...See you tomorrow...
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♥♥♥
~~ Sherry said:Recently, my husband put his car in reverse and
accidentally drove it into a wall. He took it to his mechanic, who replaced the dented bumper.
A few days later, he did it again.
"I'm so embarrassed," he moaned, reaching for the phone.
"Why not tell him it was me this time?" I suggested.
"Maybe I will," he said while dialing.
"It worked the last time."
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~~ What lies on the ground 100ft in the air?
A dead Centipede.
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~~ How do you know if an Irishman is present at a cock
fight?
He's the one that enters a Duck.
How do you know if a Polack is present at a cock fight?
He's the one that bets money on a duck.
How do you know if an Italian is present at a cock fight?
The Duck wins.
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~~ Why do they always get pissed
when I order a ham sammich at the Mid-Eastern Deli?
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~~ During a shortage of eligible men, a bear, a pig and a
rabbit are called up for national service.
While waiting for the medical examinations, they all admit
they're terrified of being killed.
‘I'm ungainly and pink,’ says the pig, truthfully.
‘The enemy will see me a mile off – so I decided to chop
my tail off.
’ The rabbit nods sagely – and the bear realizes the bunny's
ears have been removed.
‘I just hope it works,’ says the rabbit.
Mystified, the bear watches as both animals enter the
examination room – then return, smiling.
‘We're free to go,’ says the rabbit.
‘They said a rabbit without ears is not a proper rabbit,
and a pig without a curly tail is not a proper pig!’
He's about to leave with the pig when the bear pipes up.
‘Hang on a minute!’ he cries.
‘I'm massive and slow – I'd not last a day.’
The other two look at the bear.
‘Well,’ says the rabbit, ‘Your sharp teeth could be useful in
combat.
You might want them removed …’ Nodding miserably,
the bear lies down – and the other animals start kicking his
fangs out.
Eventually the dazed bear, blood pouring from his mouth,
stumbles through the door.
A moment later he returns.
‘Did you get let off?’ says the pig.
‘Yesh,’ splutters the bear....... ‘Apparently I'm too fat.’
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~~ Today, I was amazed when I found out the hard way
how police now stop criminals.
I was stunned.
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~~ Two life-long friends were enjoying
a few beers down their local bar, when one said to the other,
"If I ask you a question, will you promise to answer me
honestly?"
"Yeah, sure thing," replied his friend, "Fire away."
"Well," said the first guy, "Why do you think all the guys
around here find my wife so attractive?"
"It's probably because of her speech impediment,"
replied the second guy.
"What do you mean her speech impediment?"
inquired the first fellow, "My wife doesn't have a speech
impediment!"
"Well," replied his friend, "You must be the only guy who
hasn't noticed that she can't say NO!"
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~~ I had to take my pet lizard to the vet........
He had a Reptile dis function.
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~~ A first-grader came to the ophthalmology office where
I work to have his vision checked.
He sat down and I turned off the lights.
Then I switched on a projector that flashed the letters
F, Z, and B on a screen.
I asked the boy what he saw.
Without hesitation he replied, "Consonants"
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~~ Customer to Waiter...
"Waiter!, What's this fly doing in my soup?"
"It appears to be doing the back stroke sir."
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~~ Customer to waiter: Everyday you charge me money
for a cup of coffee.
How wonderful it would be if you serve me coffee free of
cost today.
Waiter: Sir, everyday you drink coffee from a filled cup.
How wonderful it would be if you drink from an empty
cup today !!!
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Todays Thought: "Be always at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let each new year find you a better person."
Raes Trivia: Golf legend Ben Hogan (1912-1997), told he might never walk again after shattering his legs in a car accident in 1949 (his car was hit by a Greyhound bus),
struggled back... and won six of his nine major championships after the accident.
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Hahaha Got news for you Gus she is the BOSS! Hate to burst your bubble friend!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDelete'a Reptile dis function' Grooooooan :-)
ReplyDeleteThat was one determined golfer
Rae x