I'm showing 24º right now, but it will be around 22º
before it starts getting warmer this morning....
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Yesterday morning out the window....
The little snow we got is going....
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The Cats are eating, and got bird seed in the feeder...
It was cold and windy.......
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They created in 1973??
I guess they never heard of The famous "Gus Burger"
on the corner.....
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I don't know about this guy.....
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Yes, Sir, right away....
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Someones gonna be in a heap of trouble.....
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I smell someones feet...
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I don't know about this.....
Sneakers cost to much now......
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Yep, Eno's the man.....
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I'll leave on this one....
I don't think you can go far with this bike.....
Your arms would give out.....
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♥♥♥
~~ Just put a deposit down on a brand new Porsche.....
I mentioned it on FaceBook too.
I said, "I can't wait for the new 911 to arrive!"
Next thing I know 4,000 Muslims have added me as a friend.
☼
~~ Mother Teresa died and went to heaven.
God greeted her at the Pearly Gates.
"Be thou hungry, Mother Teresa?" asked God.
"I could eat," Mother Teresa replied.
So God opened a can of tuna and reached for a chunk of rye
bread and they began to share it.
While eating this humble meal, Mother Teresa looked down
into Hell and saw the inhabitants devouring huge steaks,
lobsters, pheasants, and pastries.
Curious, but deeply trusting, she remained quiet.
The next day God again invited her to join him for a meal.
Again, it was tuna and rye bread.
Once again, Mother Teresa could see the denizens of Hell
enjoying lamb, turkey, venison, and delicious desserts.
Still she said nothing.
The following day, mealtime arrived and another can of tuna
was opened.
She couldn't contain herself any longer.
Meekly, she asked, "God, I am grateful to be in heaven with
you as a reward for the pious, obedient life I led.
But here in heaven all I get to eat is tuna and a piece of rye
bread and in the Other Place they eat like emperors and kings!
I just don't understand it..."
God sighed. "Let's be honest Teresa,"
He said, ". . . for just two people, it doesn't pay to cook."
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~~ One burp says to another.....
"Let's be stinkers and sneak out the back door"
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~~ A couple had been debating the purchase of a new auto
for weeks.
He wanted a new truck.
She wanted a fast little sports-like car so she could zip through
traffic around town.
He would probably have settled on any beat up old truck,
but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price
range.
"Look!" she said.....
"I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in 4 seconds or
less.
And my birthday is coming up..... You could surprise me."
Well, for her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom
scale.
Services will be at Downing Funeral Home on Monday the 12th.
Due to the condition of the body, this will be a closed casket
service.
Please send your donations to the
"Think Before You Say Things To Your Wife Foundation.
☼
~~ What goes sis-BOOM-baa?
Exploding sheep.
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~~ Two flies sitting on the toilet seat.
One got pissed off.....
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~~ A fifth-grader asked her mother the age-old question,
"How did I get here?"
Her mother told her, "God sent you."
"Did God send you, too?" asked the child.
"Yes, Dear," the mother replied.
"What about Grandma and Grandpa?" the child persisted.
"He sent them also," the mother said.
"Did he send their parents, too?" asked the child.
"Yes, Dear, He did," said the mother patiently.
"So you're telling me that there has been NO sex in this
family for 200 years?
No wonder everyone's so grouchy around here!"
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~~ What kind of car does a proctologist drive?
A brown probe.
☼
~~ Interviewer to Millionaire:
"To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire to?"
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman.
What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: "A Billionaire!"
☼
~~ There's a new Muslim clothing shop opened in
R-ville.
but I've been banned from it after asking to look at some
bomber jackets.
☼
~~ Q: What's the difference between a walrus and a banana?
A: You'd better find out,
because if you ever try to peel a walrus...
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Todays Thought: "You are not just a drop in the ocean........ You are the mighty ocean in the drop"
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Rae, some Triva: Before he settled on the name Mark Twain, Samuel Clemens published work under the names of: Thomas Jefferson Snodgrass, Sergeant Fathom, and W. Apaminondas Adrastus Blab.
1 comment:
Hmmmm I wonder why he decided to change his name? LOL x
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