Welcome to my little bit of the world....
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A nice Sunrise I took one year ago....
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Come on now you gotta eat your broccoli...
It's good for you.....
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Broccoli has alot of haters...
Gus is one......
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ME! ME1...give it to me.....
I love it......
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No. looks like he's doing it right...
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Ok.. But she's going to kick your butt...
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Just go out the open back, Dummy!!
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You look like a Psycho..... nah!
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Come on! there is plenty room....
Move to the back of the car...please!
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Kick some butts with these shoes and I bet
they will move....
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I bet, Me and Pete wouldn't get far before we would be on
our BUTTS..........
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♥♥♥
~~ Gus: "My dog tried to eat my newspaper."
Pete: "What did you do?"
Gus: "I took the words right out of his mouth."
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~~ An aching back sent me stumbling to the
pharmacy for relief.
After a search I found what I was looking for:
a selection of heating pads specifically for people
with back pain...all on the lowest shelf.
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~~ Judge: "Do you wish to challenge any of the jury?"
Gus: "Well, I think I can lick that little fellow on this end."
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~~ A workman engaged in blasting dallied too long
and went up with the charge.
As the man went upwards,the foreman drew out his
notebook.
When the workman received his week's pay a sum
corresponding to the time he had spent in the air was
deducted from his wage.
( Damn, I worked at the same place..... )
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~~ The boss did not find it amusing when one of his
employees said,
"I always take my paycheck to the bank.
It's too little to go by itself."
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~~ A Five Year Old Child's Funny View Of Weddings
Hilary, a grandmother, overhears her 5-year-old
granddaughter, Mo, playing "weddings."
As the little girl, Mo, marches the bride down the aisle,
the wedding vows went something like this:
'You have the right to remain silent, anything you say
may be held against you, you have the right to have
an attorney present.
You may now kiss the bride.'
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~~ A frustrated golfer said,
"I'm giving up on this game.
Maybe bowling is more my speed.
In bowling, I bet I will almost never lose the ball!"
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~~ Vicky, young single lady visits the local dating
agency and explains, 'I'm looking for a husband.
Can you please help me to find a suitable one?'
The dating receptionist needs to find out some details
so she asks, 'What are your requirements, please?'
'Well, let me see.' Vicky says, 'He needs to be fine
looking, polite, humorous, sporty, knowledgeable,
good at singing and dancing.
Willing accompany me the whole day at home during
my leisure hours, if I don't go out.
Telling me interesting stories when I need companion
for conversation and be silent when I want to rest.'
The receptionist listens politely and carefully and
responds, 'I understand..... You need a television.'
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~~ "If you work on a lobster boat,
sneaking up behind someone and pinching him is
probably a joke that gets old real fast."
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~~ 'The thrill, the excitement is gone from my marriage,'
George complains to his mate, Tony.
'Why not add some intrigue to your life and have an
affair?' suggests Tony naughtily.
But what if my wife finds out?' frowns George.
'Lummee, George,' explains Tony,
'this is the 21st century we live in, mate.
Go ahead and tell her about it.'
So George returns home and says, 'Poppet,
I think an affair will bring us closer together.'
'Forget it,' replies his wife.
'I've tried that - it didn't work.'
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~~ Two Yanks touring London in a taxi.
What is that ? asked one of the Yanks.
Why that is Buckingham Palace...
answered the taxi driver.
Well you should see the states.
We have much bigger houses over there.
And what is that?
That is the Post Office Tower, replied the taxi driver.
Oh, our towers are much bigger countered the Yanks.
This went on for much of the day until they went past
another building.
Our buildings are much bigger than that one too.
I thought it might be said the taxi driver.....
That is the mental institute.
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~~ Gus sez....Do you know the punishment for bigamy?
Two mother-in-law's!
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Todays thought: A parking place is a space that suddenly disappears while you are making a U-turn.
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