Well, we're in a heat wave here,...105ºdegrees today...
110º degrees tomorrow.......
Keep cool....every one!
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The cows are down by the creek waiting
for breakfast........
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Breakfast ready for the birds.....
Also got the Hummingbird feeders full.....
They will need it for the next few days....
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Cheetos anyone??
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Pole dancing??
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What can I say......??
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Play time.......
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Oh, NO! Not that........
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Looks like "SUPER CHICKEN"
(my old radio handle)
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Maybe this picture will cool you off "Witchy"!
I know it's hot down there....
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♥♥♥
~~ Q: What do you give a man who has everything?
A: Antibiotics.... ( had my share of them last week)
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~~ Pete....I can never remember.
When making homemade meatloaf, do you wash your hands
before or after mixing the meatloaf?
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~~ Bobbie was at the beauty parlor when she overheard
another woman rattle on to the manicurist about the sad state
of her marriage.
"Things have gotten so bad," she said, "I think I might ask for
a divorce. What do you think?"
"That's a serious matter," came the reply.
"I think you should consult another manicurist."
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~~ Q: Did you hear about the alligators that joined the FBI?
A: They became investi-gators.
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~~ Every day a resident in the senior-citizens home where I
work told me, a Protestant, that she, a Catholic, had prayed to
St. Jude for me.
I would thank her and leave feeling that I was special to her in
some way.
But one day, curious, I asked her who St. Jude was.
To my chagrin she replied, "He's the patron saint of lost
causes."
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~~ To promote recycling on base, five large dumpsters by the
mess tent had signs stating what type of garbage was to be
placed in each.
It took several days and many reminders, but eventually the
soldiers were complying.
One day as the regiment lined up for the noon meal, a civilian
garbage truck arrived.
In full view of the soldiers, the contents of all five containers
were dumped in the one truck.
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~~ On the way to our children's school spring performance,
our six- year-old son was uncharacteristically quiet.
As we approached the school, he announced:
"I don't really know my lines, so you might want to watch
another kid."
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~~ I got mugged by a magician............
It's not funny: He took my wallet, my watch, and every silver
dollar I had behind my ear.
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~~ There was a poor old Irish cobbler whose shop was next
door to a very upscale French restaurant.
Every day at lunch time, Mike, the Irish gent, would go out the
back of his shop and eat his soda bread and maybe a kipper or
piece of Irish blue cheese while smelling the wonderful odors
coming from the restaurant's kitchen.
One morning, the Irishman was surprised to receive an invoice
in the mail from the adjoining restaurant for "enjoyment of
food"
Mystified, he marched right over to the restaurant to point out
that he had not bought a thing from them.
The manager said, "You're enjoying our food, so you should pay
us for it."
The Irishman refused to pay and the restaurant took him to
court.
At the hearing, the judge asked the restaurant to present their
side of the case.
The manager said, "Every day, this man comes and sits outside
our kitchen and smells our food while eating his.
It is clear that we are providing added value to his poor food
and we deserve to be compensated for it."
The judge turned to Mike and said, "What do you have to say
to that?"
The old Irishman didn't say a thing but smiled and stuck his
hand in his pocket and rattled the few coins he had inside.
The judge asked him, "What is the meaning of that?"
The Irishman replied with a mile wide grin, - "I'm paying for
the smell of his food with the sound of my money."
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~~ A good friend can tell you what is the matter with you in
a minute.
He may not seem such a good friend after telling.
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~~ While I was waiting at the airline ticket counter,
I watched passengers' luggage ride the conveyor belt,
disappearing after the bags hit the rubber strips hanging in
front of the luggage exit.
I noticed the strips all bore portions of stickers which had
rubbed off the luggage as it passed through.
As I studied them, it was obvious what message most of the
stickers bore: FRAGILE.
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~~ I was teaching my kindergarten class a difficult concept:
the period.
I explained that you don't use a period after every word,
only after a complete thought.
Later, a little boy who loves to talk put up his hand and
launched into a winding tale about his father.
I was just about to say he would have to save the rest of the
story for another time when a little girl beside him leaned over
and said in an annoyed tone, "You need a period!"
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Todays Thought; Gardening and laughing are two of the best things in life you
can do to promote good health and a sense of well being."
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