as the readership went down, way down.....
Oh, Well Life goes on........Bobbie likes it, I know.
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Have a bad cold this morning, but I did get up
and get the sunrise......
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Oh, My, you stinker....
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Alisons egg cat....meoww.......
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He likes the egg cat.......
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Bubba, here likes the food....can't you tell?
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Okay.....sent $49.00....
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Oh, noes.....not again......
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Okay......will do.....
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My favorite toon.....He's cool....
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I guess I'll leave on this pic......
Goat taxi??
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♥♥♥
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~~ The orthopaedic surgeon I work for was moving to a new office,
and his staff was helping transport many of the items.
I sat the display skeleton in the front of my car,
and had fastened the seatbelt around it to stop it falling over.
I hadn’t considered the drive across town.
At one traffic light, the stares of the people in the car beside me
became obvious, and I looked across and explained,
“I’m delivering him to my doctor’s office.”
The other driver leaned out of his window.
“I hate to tell you, man,” he said, “but I think it’s too late!”
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~~ A retired Linsay who volunteers to entertain patients in nursing
homes and hospitals went to one local hospital in Hopwell and took
his portable keyboard along.
He told some jokes and sang some funny songs at patients’ bedsides.
When he finished he said, in farewell, “I hope you get better.”
One elderly gentleman replied, “I hope you get better, too.”
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~~ A old woman took a package to the post office to mail and was
told it would cost $3.95 for fast delivery or $2.30 for slower service.
“There is no hurry,” she told the clerk,
“just so the package is delivered in my lifetime.”
He glanced at her and said, “That will be $3.95, please.”
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~~ The drunk was floundering down the alley carrying a box with holes
on the side.
He bumped into a friend who asked, “What do you have in there, pal?”
“A mongoose.”
“What for?”
“Well, you know how drunk I can get.
When I get drunk I see snakes,
and I’m scared to death of snakes.
That’s why I got this mongoose, for protection.”
“But,” the friend said, “you idiot!
Those are imaginary snakes.”
“That’s okay,” said the drunk, showing his friend the interior of the box,
“So is the mongoose.”
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~~ Q: What kind of flying school doesn't anyone want to go to?
A: One that has a crash course.
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~~ His philandering wife was constantly going about in the skimpiest of
outfits, and Mr. Shepherd had had enough.
Deciding he's like to see her in something long and flowing, he pushed
her in the Mississippi River.
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~~ Gus: What three letters make a man of a boy?
Felix: I don't have the foggiest.
Gus: A-G-E.
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~~ After cashing a cheque at the bank, the woman in front of me
stood staring at her money.
"Did I give you enough back?" asked the teller.
Yes" she said, "But barely."
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~~ "Can she cook like I can?" the distraught woman asked between
sobs.
"Not on her best day," he replied.
"Can she buy you expensive gifts like I do?" she asked.
"No, she's broke," he said.
"Well, then, is it sex?" she inquired.
"Nobody does it like you, babe!" he replied.
"Then what can she do that I can't?" the woman tearfully asked.
"Sue me for child support!!"
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~~ Bobbie said:
With time, women gain weight because we accumulate so much
information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room,
it distributes out to the rest of our bodies.
So we aren't heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy.
Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think,
Good grief, look how smart I am!
Must be where 'Smart Ass' came from!
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Today's Thought; If life is a flower,love is the honey and that is the reason
I call my love ‘honey’! .....
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Bobbie's clever. Thank her for me please, I'm proud to be cultured and educated LOL
ReplyDeleteRae