Down Hummingbird Lane

Good mornong....friends....and all other readers....
Note, to the spammers.....all the comments goes
through me before their posted....So there will
will not be spam on here!.... Good day!
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I think I've see it all now..A valentine watermelon....

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Great....I don't like watermelons...

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3 hotdogs pleese!....

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Oh...Oh...Run....

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I'm getting tha mouses.....

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Just what I need, anice camper to head to warm Fla......

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Now, this is pretty neat.....

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This one is tired.....

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If I can find a seat....see you later.....

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♥♥♥

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~~ "Do not forget the hands of the aged; they have touched

much of life and have become sensitive and sympathetic."

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~~ A stewardess was getting very annoyed by 3 little children on
the plane.
They had been bugging her since take-off, complaining that they
were hungry or bored or tired or thirsty or needed to go to the
bathroom and whatever else you could imagine a small child
commenting and complaining about.
Well, the stewardess had had enough.
The next time the children said that they were bored,
the stewardess told them to go play outside.

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~~ Being Scottish Means,
* A lot of ethic groups are known for being tight with money.
Other groups are known to drink too much.
Some groups are even known for being people of few words.
Only the Scots however have combined all these traits and
thrown in a kilt and bagpipes for good measure.

* The Scot told his wife, "Be sure now to take off your new eye
glasses if you're not looking at anything."

* A Scotsman's last daughter got married and the old man was
just thrilled to death -- the confetti was getting dirty.

* The jet plane started to rattle.
Quickly, the pilot turned northward.
As soon as they crossed the border into Scotland,
everything tightened up.

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~~ Telephone conversation:
“I want a box for two, please.”
Clerk: “We have no boxes for two!”
Customer: “Come, come.
You mean to tell me that tickets for the show are sold out?”
Clerk: “I think you have the wrong number.
This is a funeral parlor!”

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~~ New to teaching, I was finishing up our Grade 4 class's unit
on genetics when Robert raised his hand.
"I understand how a mother gives the baby her genes," he said,
"But how does the father do it?"
Unprepared for his question, I told him to ask his parents.
"They won't know," he said.
"They'll know," I assured him.
"No they won't, he persisted.
"How can you be so sure?" I asked.
"They didn't even know what a parallelogram was," he said.

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~~ Supposedly true story:
An editor met Sir James Barrie, author of Peter Pan.
“Sir James, I suppose some of your plays are better successes
than others.”
Sir James: “True, some Peter out, and some Pan out.”

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~~ My sister Laura, a travel agent, often travels to different
countries, exploring new locations for her clients.
She heard about a beautiful hotel on top of a mountain on the
Greek island of Ikaria and rented a moped to find it.
Searching for hours, Laura stopped at a small restaurant with
tables on a porch and ordered a cup of coffee.
A half hour later, she was ready to set out again and asked for
her bill, but the proprietor said there was no charge.
"That is very kind of you, Laura said, "but I insist you let me pay."
"Ma'am," the man said, "There is no charge for the coffee
because this is my house."

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~~ On our first trip to Britain, my wife was determined to visit the
home of writer Beatrix Potter in the Lake District.
We had a terrible time finding our way, though.
Driving on narrow roads full of hairpin turns, there was nary a
sign to help us.
When we finally arrived, the famous author's little home was
jammed with tourists.
Later, as we were about to leave, I approached a man who
worked at the attraction, mentioning how difficult it was to find.
"But look at all these visitors!" he said.
"Think what would happen if we helped people get here!"

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~~ The conductor turned to the viola student and said:
"You should have taken up the viola earlier."
"Why" asked the student.
"Do you think the practice would have made me really good?"
"No" said the conductor.
"But you might have given up by now."

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~~ A draftee was being questioned by an army psychiatrist.
"What do you think of the army?"
"I love it," the young man said.
"I want to wear the uniform proudly and learn all about soldiering.
Write that down."
The psychiatrist went on, "Will you be a capable soldier?"
"Sir, give me a gun and I'll show you.
I'll shoot until the gun melts.
If I can't get another weapon, I'll pickup a stick and go at the
enemy with that.
Then I'll go at them barehanded.
I'll bite them if I have to.
Write that down."
The psychiatrist said, "You sound a little crazy"
"Write that down!"
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Todays thought:  You can pick your friends,and you can pick your nose,

but you can not pick your friends nose!

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