Hope every one has a great one.....
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This is Milo...A special kitty!.... picture by Alison..
The ball is to big for his mouth, but he tries......another picture by Alison....
He's ready to run from that dog........
Gotta watch this one....he'll lick you to death......
The "Good Humor" ice cream trucks never looked like this when they camearound......
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Ready to take off too.......
Fell in did you??? got to be more careful.....
I an't going there..........................
Fell in did you??? got to be more careful......
I an't going there...........................
♥♥♥
~~~ Flip Wilson used to say, "never order a drink for the road because the road is already laid out".
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~~~ Saying Grace at mealtime was a tradition at Grandma's house.
At breakfast, lunch and supper, all who gathered around the table would bow their heads to give blessing for the food they were about to eat.
Much to Grandma's sadness, this tradition was not brought to our home by my mother, so as a three-year-old, the practice of saying Grace was very confusing to me.
Mother embarrassingly recalls that once, while Grandma rambled through one of her lengthy mealtime thanks to God, I asked in a rather loud voice, "Why is Grandma talking to her plate?"
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~~~ My sight-impaired friend was in a grocery store with her guide dog when the manager asked, "Is that a blind dog?"
My friend said, "I hope not, or we're both in trouble."
.
~~~ A college junior takes his new girlfriend to a football game.
The young couple found seats in the crowded stadium and were watching the action.
A substitute was put into the game.
He ran onto the field to take his position.
The boy said to his girfriend, "Take a good look at that fellow.
I expect him to be our best man next year.
"His girfriend snuggled closer and said to the surprised young man, "That's the strangest way I ever heard of for a fellow to propose to a girl.
But regardless of how you said it, I accept!"
.
~~~ The dinners's honored guest was introduced as follows: "We're very pleased to have as our guest speaker a woman who has to catch a plane in twenty minutes."
.
~~~ An art gallery was hosting an exhibition of an artist who specialized in painting pictures of plates of food.
A couple approached one oil painting which depicted a huge bowl of soup.
"Ins't that picture magnificent?" said the woman.
"Needs salt!" replied her husband.
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~~~ When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
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~~~ Take a lesson from the legend of Demosthenes, Greek statesman and orator.
Fill your mouth with marbles and make a speech.
Every time you give a speech thereafter, put one less marble in your mouth.
By the time you lose all your marbles, you'll be a great orator.
.
~~~ My husband, a computer-systems troubleshooter, rode with me in my new car one afternoon.
He had been working on a customer's computer all morning and was still tense from the session. When I stopped for a traffic light, I made sure to leave a safe distance from the stop line to keep oncoming drivers from hitting the car.
I couldn't help but laugh when my husband impatiently waved at me to move the car forward while saying, "Scroll up, honey."
.
~~~ Shrink Problem ; Did you hear about the guy who died from non drug-related psychiatric treatment?
Turns out that he had been overmeditated!
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~~~ YOU: I bet I can jump across the street.
(When your friend says that you can't, walk across the street and jump.)
.
~~~ The geography teacher was upset when her least-motivated pupil failed another test.
"You never study" she chided.
"What are you waiting for?"
The pupil replied "Grandpa says the world is changing, I'm waiting for it to settle down."
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~~~ SHERIFF JONES: The outlaw got away, eh?
Didn't you guard the exits like I told you?
DEPUTY SMITH: Yes, I did, Sheriff.
But the outlaw tricked me....... He went out through the entrance.
.
.
Todays thought: Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie.
.
.
~~~ Saying Grace at mealtime was a tradition at Grandma's house.
At breakfast, lunch and supper, all who gathered around the table would bow their heads to give blessing for the food they were about to eat.
Much to Grandma's sadness, this tradition was not brought to our home by my mother, so as a three-year-old, the practice of saying Grace was very confusing to me.
Mother embarrassingly recalls that once, while Grandma rambled through one of her lengthy mealtime thanks to God, I asked in a rather loud voice, "Why is Grandma talking to her plate?"
.
~~~ My sight-impaired friend was in a grocery store with her guide dog when the manager asked, "Is that a blind dog?"
My friend said, "I hope not, or we're both in trouble."
.
~~~ A college junior takes his new girlfriend to a football game.
The young couple found seats in the crowded stadium and were watching the action.
A substitute was put into the game.
He ran onto the field to take his position.
The boy said to his girfriend, "Take a good look at that fellow.
I expect him to be our best man next year.
"His girfriend snuggled closer and said to the surprised young man, "That's the strangest way I ever heard of for a fellow to propose to a girl.
But regardless of how you said it, I accept!"
.
~~~ The dinners's honored guest was introduced as follows: "We're very pleased to have as our guest speaker a woman who has to catch a plane in twenty minutes."
.
~~~ An art gallery was hosting an exhibition of an artist who specialized in painting pictures of plates of food.
A couple approached one oil painting which depicted a huge bowl of soup.
"Ins't that picture magnificent?" said the woman.
"Needs salt!" replied her husband.
.
~~~ When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
.
~~~ Take a lesson from the legend of Demosthenes, Greek statesman and orator.
Fill your mouth with marbles and make a speech.
Every time you give a speech thereafter, put one less marble in your mouth.
By the time you lose all your marbles, you'll be a great orator.
.
~~~ My husband, a computer-systems troubleshooter, rode with me in my new car one afternoon.
He had been working on a customer's computer all morning and was still tense from the session. When I stopped for a traffic light, I made sure to leave a safe distance from the stop line to keep oncoming drivers from hitting the car.
I couldn't help but laugh when my husband impatiently waved at me to move the car forward while saying, "Scroll up, honey."
.
~~~ Shrink Problem ; Did you hear about the guy who died from non drug-related psychiatric treatment?
Turns out that he had been overmeditated!
.
~~~ YOU: I bet I can jump across the street.
(When your friend says that you can't, walk across the street and jump.)
.
~~~ The geography teacher was upset when her least-motivated pupil failed another test.
"You never study" she chided.
"What are you waiting for?"
The pupil replied "Grandpa says the world is changing, I'm waiting for it to settle down."
.
~~~ SHERIFF JONES: The outlaw got away, eh?
Didn't you guard the exits like I told you?
DEPUTY SMITH: Yes, I did, Sheriff.
But the outlaw tricked me....... He went out through the entrance.
.
.
Todays thought: Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie.
.
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