.
Too much breakfast??..............he looks stuffed.....
A winning dog??.
Cooling off with the pigs......
Cooling off with the pigs.......
Roof leak??....
Roof leak??.....
They thought this was a funny blog.......
He's hungry....wants food.....
They thought this was a funny blog........
He's hungry....wants food......
They were the largest trees......Wow!
He's just hanging on........
This is the 5 legged dog in the news......
They were the largest trees......Wow!.
He's just hanging on.........
This is the 5 legged dog in the news.......
.
♥♥♥
~~~ Phil's hair kept falling out and he complained to his barber.
"That stuff you gave me," he cried, "is terrible!
You said two bottles of it would make my hair grow, but nothing's happened."
"I don't understand it," said the barber......
"That's the best hair restorer made."
"Well," said Phil, "I don't mind *drinking* another bottle, but it had better work!"
.
~~~ REASONS NOT TO TRAIN A DOG:
1. Like to see the paw prints on my visitors clothes..
2. The house is too orderly..
3. Love the sound of barking in the morning, noon, afternoon, evening, and night..
4. Want the Vet to get a new BMW..
5. Garden and backyard need renovation, don't want to pay a gardener..
6. Furniture looks too nice..
7. Neighbors don't complain enough..
.
~~~ Paul got off the elevator on the 40th floor and nervously knocked on his blind date's door. She opened it and was as beautiful and charming as everyone had said.
"I'll be ready in a few minutes," she said.
"Why don't you play with Rollo while you're waiting?"
He does wonderful tricks....
He rolls over, shakes hands, sits up and if you make a hoop with your arms, he'll jump through."
The dog followed Paul onto the balcony and started rolling over.
Paul made a hoop with his arms and Rollo jumped through -- and over the balcony railing.
Just then Paul's date walked out.
"Isn't Rollo the cutest, happiest dog you've ever seen?"
"To tell the truth, " he replied, "Rollo seemed a little depressed to me!"
.
~~~ Q: What American city has been judged as being the most humorless?
A: Hallmark Cards says that El Paso, Texas, is the city with the worst sense of humor.
They base that on polls in which very few people there said they considered themselves funny. The city also has a very low sales of Hallmark's humorous cards.
.
~~~ "The saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have."
.
~~~ Back when I was working as a graphic designer, I often grabbed lunch at a Chinese restaurant.
I'll never forget a bit of wisdom from a fortune cookie I received one day.
"In case of fire, keep calm, pay bill, then run!"
.
~~~ I just got my bill for my stay in the hospital.
Now I know why surgeons wear masks.
.
~~~ In August 2004, fifty English soccer fans on their way home over Caerphilly Mountain after watching Cardiff play Coventry were stranded for several hours...because they were too heavy for their bus to climb a steep mountain road.
"I didn't think we were that heavy," one passenger said, "although we do like the pies they sell at the match...
.
~~~ Two old ladies sat on a bench talking.
One said to the other, "Good heavens!
Who did your hair?.... It looks like a wig!"
The second lady replied, "It is a wig."
"Really?" exclaimed the first lady, "You could never tell!"
.
~~~ Snowboarding is an activity that is popular with people who do not feel that regular skiing is lethal enough.
.
~~~ Church members are either pillars or caterpillars...the pillars hold up the church, and the caterpillars just crawl in and out.
.
~~~ Ree bought a bottle of Fountain of Youth.
She turns to her husband, and says, "I can't get the childproof cap off."
.
.
Todays Thought; "If you want to know how old a woman is...ask her sister-in-law."
Which brings to mind, another one......Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm..
.
"That stuff you gave me," he cried, "is terrible!
You said two bottles of it would make my hair grow, but nothing's happened."
"I don't understand it," said the barber......
"That's the best hair restorer made."
"Well," said Phil, "I don't mind *drinking* another bottle, but it had better work!"
.
~~~ REASONS NOT TO TRAIN A DOG:
1. Like to see the paw prints on my visitors clothes..
2. The house is too orderly..
3. Love the sound of barking in the morning, noon, afternoon, evening, and night..
4. Want the Vet to get a new BMW..
5. Garden and backyard need renovation, don't want to pay a gardener..
6. Furniture looks too nice..
7. Neighbors don't complain enough..
.
~~~ Paul got off the elevator on the 40th floor and nervously knocked on his blind date's door. She opened it and was as beautiful and charming as everyone had said.
"I'll be ready in a few minutes," she said.
"Why don't you play with Rollo while you're waiting?"
He does wonderful tricks....
He rolls over, shakes hands, sits up and if you make a hoop with your arms, he'll jump through."
The dog followed Paul onto the balcony and started rolling over.
Paul made a hoop with his arms and Rollo jumped through -- and over the balcony railing.
Just then Paul's date walked out.
"Isn't Rollo the cutest, happiest dog you've ever seen?"
"To tell the truth, " he replied, "Rollo seemed a little depressed to me!"
.
~~~ Q: What American city has been judged as being the most humorless?
A: Hallmark Cards says that El Paso, Texas, is the city with the worst sense of humor.
They base that on polls in which very few people there said they considered themselves funny. The city also has a very low sales of Hallmark's humorous cards.
.
~~~ "The saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have."
.
~~~ Back when I was working as a graphic designer, I often grabbed lunch at a Chinese restaurant.
I'll never forget a bit of wisdom from a fortune cookie I received one day.
"In case of fire, keep calm, pay bill, then run!"
.
~~~ I just got my bill for my stay in the hospital.
Now I know why surgeons wear masks.
.
~~~ In August 2004, fifty English soccer fans on their way home over Caerphilly Mountain after watching Cardiff play Coventry were stranded for several hours...because they were too heavy for their bus to climb a steep mountain road.
"I didn't think we were that heavy," one passenger said, "although we do like the pies they sell at the match...
.
~~~ Two old ladies sat on a bench talking.
One said to the other, "Good heavens!
Who did your hair?.... It looks like a wig!"
The second lady replied, "It is a wig."
"Really?" exclaimed the first lady, "You could never tell!"
.
~~~ Snowboarding is an activity that is popular with people who do not feel that regular skiing is lethal enough.
.
~~~ Church members are either pillars or caterpillars...the pillars hold up the church, and the caterpillars just crawl in and out.
.
~~~ Ree bought a bottle of Fountain of Youth.
She turns to her husband, and says, "I can't get the childproof cap off."
.
.
Todays Thought; "If you want to know how old a woman is...ask her sister-in-law."
Which brings to mind, another one......Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm..
.
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