Down Hummingbird Lane

Good morning....people....
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This mornings Sunrise......
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Do you think we could do that here on the Lane???

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He's looking for his girlfriend....she's took off.....

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Good, I'll meet you there......

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12 years old and cought this whopper......

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She wants some of that fish.......

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We had one that liked to do the same...but he wasn't around long.....

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She's cool.......................................

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Oh, well....I stay there.....

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~~~ Pointing to the passenger's water bottle, an airport screener said, "Sorry, you can't bring liquids on board.
"The passenger became irate....
"It's not a liquid," he snapped..... "It's a beverage."

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~~~ Printed sign near door: Door Alarmed.
Handwritten sign nearby: Window Frightened.

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~~~ Whenever George Washington felt a telltale tickle in his throat or sniffle sneaking up, he tucked in to a particularly pungent bedtime snack: an onion.
As the popular tale goes, Washington would eat a cooked onion in order to ward off colds.
The Founding Father's homeopathic regimen makes nutritional sense.
Pearly white onions are chock-full of vitamins C, B1 and B6, along with a healthy dose of potassium, phosphorus and fiber.
Though onions aren't universally appealing to the human palate, they have the potential to lower bad cholesterol, relieve hypertension and minimize blood clotting.

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~~~ Driving my three-year-old daughter to day care before work, I noticed a family of dead raccoons on the road.
I quickly sped past, hoping she wouldn't spot them.
No such luck."Daddy, what was that?"
"Some wood must have fallen from a truck," I fibbed.
"Oh," she said..... "Is that what killed all those raccoons?"

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~~~ As an elementary-school teacher, I have conferences with parents about their children.
At one meeting a mother asked, "Is there some way that the teachers can have my son do his homework at school?
He doesn't like to do it at home."

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~~~ Man: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans.
Is it a boy or a girl?....
Bystander: It's a girl..... She's my daughter.
Man: Oh, please forgive me, sir..... I had no idea you were her father.
Bystander: I'm not...... I'm her mother.

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~~~ There is an OLD story about the data center of the future.
This data center runs 24/7 with only a man and a dog.
The man's job is to feed the dog.
The dog's job is to make sure the man does not touch the computer.

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~~~ My Mom bought my Dad a piano for his birthday.
A few weeks later, I asked how he was doing with it."
Oh," said my Mom, "I persuaded him to switch to a tuba."
"How come?" I asked.
"Well," she answered, "because with a tuba, he can't sing."

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~~~ My 7-year-old daughter, Ree, was selling Girl Guide cookies door to door.
After hearing her sales pitch, one lady said she couldn't buy any because she had no money on her.
Ree's innocent reply was, "If you want, I could wait here while you go and check your purse."

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~~~ As they entered the store where I work, a mother issued stern warnings to her son about looking but not touching.
But after several minutes of browsing curiously among the myriad of oh-so- touchable items, the boy reached out to feel a colorful stone.
"What did I just tell you about touching things?" his mother asked.
"But Mom," he said, "the sign says... 'Touch Stones."

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~~~ My daughter's family like a lot of busy families, eats out often.
When I was visiting them, I decided to make a special home-cooked dinner and asked my five-year-old grandson.
"What's your favorite thing to have for supper, Wyatt?"
"At what restaurant, Grandma? he asked.
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Todays Thought; TELEVISION: A commercial delivery system.
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