Might not get on later.......dial up is bad, but thats all we can get.....
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Hey! that's what you get when you live in the boonies.....
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Woops.........bad landing on the ice.........
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Now....talking about a bad landing !! this has gotta hurt.....
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He's singing the blues, for his "Sweety"......like someone I know.....
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Buddies..........................................
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♥♥♥
~~~ Telephone solicitors are one of Gus's pet peeves.
He is especially annoyed by those who offer "free gifts" as part of their sales pitch.
Late one night, Gus was in bed when the phone rang.
The voice on the end of the line said: "Congratulations, you've just won a free burial plot!"
"Great!"..... Gus replied...... "Send it over."
Then he hung up.
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~~~ Our newer, high-speed computer was in the shop for repair, and my son was forced to work on our old model with the black-and-white printer.
"Dad," he complained to me one day, "this is like we're living back in the twentieth century."
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~~~ I always thought that my cat family tended to view me as the funny-looking two-legged cat who runs the can opener.
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~~~ Rock concerts are a little different now than when I was younger.
Recently, I went to a concert with some friends.
As the band started to play a ballad, we instinctively raised our cigarette lighters, like all good rock fans I grew up with.
But looking around me, I noticed that times had indeed changed.
The mostly under 25 crowd was swaying to the upraised glow of their cellphones.
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~~~ My sister-in-law, a truck driver, had decided to get a dog for protection.
As she inspected a likely candidate, the trainer told her, "He doesn't like men."
Perfect, my sister-in-law thought, and took the dog.
Then one day she was approached by two men in a parking lot, and she watched to see how her canine bodyguard would react.
Soon it became clear that the trainer wasn't kidding.
As the men got closer, the dog ran under the nearest car.
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~~~ Next time you wave, use all your fingers.
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~~~ Gus was sent to court for drunk and disorderly conduct.
The judge inquired where the defendant worked.
"Here and there," he replied.
"And what do you do for a living?"
"This and that," came the answer.
The judge turned to a policeman and instructed him to take the man straight to jail.
"Wait," implored the accused, "When will I come out?"
"Sooner or later....."
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~~~ The two mountain climbers had reached the end of their exhausting journey.
Though at the point of collapse, they made it to the top.
"It almost cost us our lives to climb this mountain," the first climber said, "but it will be worth it to plant our country's flag on the top.
This is the proudest moment of my life.
Please--"hand me the flag."
The second mountain climber stared at him in surprise and said, "I thought you brought it!"
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~~~ The presiding judge in a case involving a man charged with tax evasion, as the defendant stood before him alone, the Judge asked if he had counsel.
Looking toward the ceiling, the man replied, "Jesus Christ is my counsellor and defender.
"The judge nodded slowly while naming his next question, which was, "Do you have local counsel?"
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~~~ The vet prescribed daily tablets for his geriatric cat, Tigger, and after several battles ,
Pete devised a way to give her the medication.
It involved wrapping Tigger in a towel, trapping her between his knees, forcing her mouth open and deposition the pill on the back of her tongue.
Pete was proud of his resourcefulness until one hectic session when he lost control of both cat and medicine.
Tigger leaped out of his grasp, paused to inspect the tablet, which had rolled across the floor, and then ate it.
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"Witchy's" Thought: While we can't always control the music we hear in this world we can always control the songs that we sing.
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