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My Mama thinks I'm cute.....................
Well, I don't.......But I an't messing with "Mama".
Gotta have "Maxine" for Missy...................................
Play time.........................................................
I bet it's Hell on the curves or turn offs...........................
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Why is there a smart woman behind every successful man and a vacant space beside every successful woman?
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Paige was telling little sister Cassidy a movie was too scary to watch when middle sister Katie added with horror, "Especially when they kiss!"
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A minister who was very fond of pure, hot horseradish always kept a bottle of it on his dining room table.
He offered some to a guest, who took a big spoonful.
When the guest finally was able to speak, he gasped, "I've heard many ministers preach hellfire, but you are the first one I've met who passed out a sample of it."
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It’s Hetty’s birthday and her husband Howard tells her that he has decided to buy her a new car.
Hetty is thrilled and can’t thank Howard enough.
Later that morning they go car hunting.
After visiting half a dozen car dealers, Hetty finds a car she likes the look of.
Howard calls over the salesman to prepare papers for his signing whilst Hetty goes back to the car to look at it one more time.
Suddenly she sees something she doesn’t like.
She goes back to Howard and says, "I’ve changed my mind.
I don’t want it." "But why, darling?" asks Howard, looking quite sad.
"You loved it 5 minutes ago."
"I don’t want to talk about it," says Hetty.
"Just take me home." Later, she tells Howard what caused her to change her mind.
"I suddenly realized that it was an ‘extra luxury’ model and so it had XL on its boot lid.
I just couldn’t own a car with XL on it.
It’s bad enough having XL on my underwear."
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If you don't want anyone to get your goat, don't let them know where you have it tied.
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