Down Hummingbird Lane

Good Morning.......peoples..........................................
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I can't wait........I'm so hungry.

I want some too......................................................

WE've already ate,.............thanks....................

Never fall asleep in the barbra's chair................

I've ate......nows nap time................................

I'm coming....I'm coming.............

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CUSTOMER: Waiter, do you serve crabs?

WAITER: Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.

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The phone bill was exceptionally high and the man of the house called a family meeting.

Dad: People this is unacceptable.

You have to limit the use of the phone.

I do not use this phone, I use the one at the office.
Mum: Same here, I hardly use this home telephone as I use my work telephone.

Son: Me too, I never use the home phone.

I always use my company mobile.

Maid: So what is the problem?

We all use our work telephones.

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A fellow was rummaging through the attic of a house he had inherited from a recently deceased grandparent when he came across a painting that looked like it had been done by one of the 18th Century great masters.

He also discovered a dusty violin that looked as though it might have been handmade.

Not being an authority on paintings nor on musical instruments of any kind, he decided to take the items to a professional appraiser.

After studying the finds for a little while, the appraiser put down his magnifying glass and said, "What you have here, young man, is a genuine Rembrandt and an authentic Stradivarius."

"Wow!" was all the fellow could say as his eyes widened and his heart began to pound.

"Unfortuneatly," added the appraiser, "Stradivarius was a lousy painter, and Rembrandt couldn't build a decent violin to save his life."

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A man walks into a meat market and says to the butcher, "I'd like a pound of kiddlies."

"Excuse me?" asked the meat cutter. "You'd like what?"

"A pound of kiddlies."

The butcher scratched his head and said, "By any chance, do you mean 'kidneys?'"

"Well," snorted the customer, "diddle I say kiddlies?"

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Driving downtown, I had to put on the brakes suddenly at an intersection when a vehicle cut us off.

I said loudly: "What a jerk!"

A couple of seconds later, my four-year-old daughter, Emma, shouted from the back: "Oh,Daddy, Momma was behind that guy yesterday!"