In the pasture of life, don't be a cowpie.

Now....that would tickle!!!

The pilot was sitting in his seat and pulled out a .38 revolver.
He placed it on top of the instrument panel, and then asked the navigator,
"Do you know what I use this for?"
The navigator replied timidly, "No, what's it for?"
The pilot responded, "I use this on navigators who get me lost!"
The navigator proceeded to pull out a .45 and place it on his chart table.
The pilot asked, "What's that for?"
"To be honest sir," the navigator replied, "I'll know we're lost before you will."

Old woman sitting alone at a table in a truckers's cafeteria...three tough, very road-weary drivers come in, see the only space to sit is at the table she's at.
They get their trays, sit down with her, and wanting to talk trucker stuff, decide to gross her out.
"Damn", says the first one, giving his armpits a delicate sniff..."I stink...haven't had a bath in three days..."
"Me neither," says his buddy..."In fact, it's been two weeks...."
"Hell, I haven't even been rained on in a month," says the third.
"I tried to change my drawers yesterday, but they fought me!"
The old woman smiles and says, "Would one of you smelly bastards please pass the salt?"

Chance of rain all week.

This barn is at the end of our road.. I see people taking pictures quite often..

A man parked his car in Washington, DC. A policeman rushed to him, shouting, "Are you crazy? Here is where the government is!"
"No problem," the man answered, "I've good locks in my car."

Life goes on..

Hard to remember days like this, when it's 90-100 degrees out..

YOU KNOW YOU'RE A FATHER WHEN...
You know you're a Father when, your famous last words are, "Ask your Mother."
It use to be wine, women and song! Now it's kool-aid, Mom and Barney!
You know what "Honey Do's" are.
You Favorite Football Team is in the Little Leagues!
Everything starts with, "Well, when I was a kid." !
You can't understand how your six year old, turned sixteen over night!
You can recite the entire McDonald's Menu by heart!
You look at your children's sleeping little faces, and tears come to your eyes!

A nice clear day......Hot.

"We've had huge rain storms all the way from Minnesota to New York.
Or as Al Gore calls it, global leaking."

Dial-up sure is slow...............

One day, President Bush was sitting in the Oval Office when all of a sudden one of his secret service agents burst through the door with a long bull whip in his hand.
The president tried to ignore him, thinking it's some kind of gag.
The secret service man then took the bull whip repeatedly "cracking" it while circling the president's desk.
The president looked up and asked him what he was doing, but the secret service agent ignored him and kept cracking the whip.
The president finally had had enough and yelled at the secret service agent,
"By executive order, I demand you tell me what you're doing!"
The secret service agent sheepishly looked up at the president and said, "Sir, I'm just beating around the Bush!"

Hot..Hot..Hot.................

These things came from Pete's Pond......Must have lots cat fish there..

Say what you will about healthy eating and all, but I've always found it awfully difficult to explain to my son (who's 6'4" to my 6' 1 in height), why junk food is bad for you.

Silence is golden, but duct tape is silver.

Party time.....
My friend "Pete"


A women's lib speaker was addressing a large group and said, "Where would man be today if it were not for woman?"
She paused a moment and looked around the room.
"I repeat, where would man be today if it were not for woman?"
From the back of the room came a voice,
"He'd be in the Garden of Eden eating strawberries." ~~~

"Weather forecast for tonight: dark."

Cool.................
"Some politicians in Florida are trying to ban the use of the term 'illegal alien' because they think it is offensive.
The Florida officials say, 'We prefer the term good swimmer.'" --Conan O'Brien

A nice rain....

A Farmer goes to the Vet and says, "My horse is constipated.
"The vet says, "Take one of these pills, put it in a long tube, stick the other end in the horse's ass, and blow the pill up there."
The Farmer comes back the next day, and he looks very sick.
The Vet says, "What happened?"
The Farmer says, "The horse blew first."
(I'm going no farther with this one)

Some local pics....

Flooded out.....
Sunset.....
Doe up on the mountain.......................

A nice summer Day.....

Bugatti Veyron W16

"In Virginia, lawmakers are considering a law banning people from wearing pants that reveal their underwear in a lewd way.

Of course you could get by this law by just not wearing any underwear."

Memorial Day...2007

This Memorial Day, I will remember that even as the free nations of the world could have lost World War II, without the will to be victorious, America could still lose the worldwide war on terror.
As always, this year I will commemorate the sacrifice of my father, who served in World Wars I and II, respectively.

He is now buried with to his beloved wife in Arlington on a hilltop surrounded by other Heros.

I will remember his service, and the noble lives they led after returning home.

I will remember that they helped to preserve a legacy of freedom and opportunity for those of us who came after them.
This Memorial Day, I will remember those who sacrificed to protect my God-given rights.

You're God's Best, Dad.......

Local pics...

Pete was telling a friend about his first junket to Las Vegas and how hard it was to get any sleep. "I was awakened at one, two and four in the morning by a drunk chorus girl banging on the door and screaming," he recalled.

"That's terrible," the friend said." How'd you ever get any sleep?"

"At five o'clock I finally unlocked the door and let her out," Pete laughed.

A pretty nice picture.....
Jappanese dump truck........bring it to Luck stone
and see how long it lasts.....



McDonalds....
If I wanted to buy 12 Chicken McNuggets from my local McDonald's,
I could simply buy 3 4-packs at $1 each...... That's $3.

OR, I could order 2 6-packs at $2.29 each.
That's $4.58, for the exact same product.
Is it any wonder that we're screwed up as a nation?

Slow now....Wait till the weekend...Party time!

Water on Mars..........
Help ! I've fallen in.......

Two flies were walking on Gus's bald head.
One turns to the other and says,
"When I was your age, this was only a footpath...

some local pixs

"You know you're old when your walker has an air bag."

An attractive young girl, chaperoned by an ugly old lady, entered the doctor's office.
"We have come for an examination," said the young girl.
"Alright," said the doctor. "Go behind that curtain and take your clothes off."
"No, not me," said the girl. "it's my old aunt here."
"Very well," said the doctor. "Madam, stick out your tongue."

Way to go Amanda....

All reports are in; life is now officially unfair.

Global warming ??
The Queen came by and wished us a happy 52ad Anniversary........
Wasn't that neat!

Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb, and Quasimodo were all talking one day.
Sleeping Beauty said, "I believe myself to be the most beautiful girl in the world."
Tom Thumb said, "I must be the smallest person in the world."
Quasimodo said, "I absolutely have to be the most disgusting person in the world."
So they all decided to go to the Guinness Book of World Records to have their claims verified.
Sleeping Beauty went in first and came out looking deliriously happy. "It's official, I AM the most beautiful girl in the world."
Tom Thumb went next and emerged triumphant, "I am now officially the smallest person in the world."
Sometime later, Quasimodo comes out looking utterly confused and says. "Who the hell is Rosie O'Donnell ?

Happy Mothers day !!

2007
1955

Couple Questions ??

Q: Why did the bull elephant paint his balls red?

A: So he could hide in the cherry tree.

Q: How did Tarzan die?

A: Picking cherries.

Energizer Bunny arrested... charged with battery

TRemember ........ The Gong Show.
The original, grand daddy of all reality shows, which will forever, have a place in my wicked heart.

Summer time....riding time...

Want a ride ?? How about this one??

Now the funny.....

John was grocery shopping with Jill, and he tossed a bag of chips into the cart.

"You don't need those!" Jill chided.
"What about those twenty chocolate bars you have in there?" John asked.
"IT'S THAT TIME OF THE MONTH!" screamed Jill.
"Oh, OK. Are you sure twenty will be enough?" asked John. ~~~

Kinda slow today..

Sunrize..

Mrs. Rosen is having her house painted, and her husband Comes home from work
and leans against the freshlyPainted wall.
The next day, she says to the painter, "You want to see Where my husband put his hand last night?"
He sighs and says, "Look, lady, I got a tough day's work ahead of me.
Why don't you just make us a cup of tea?"

What Can I Say.......

My first car.......1936 Chev. Age 16
Bingo with the Queen......

On a recent tour of the Capitol Building in Washington, D.C., our guide pointed out a tall, benevolent-looking gentleman and informed us that he was the Congressional Chaplain.
One of the ladies in our group asked, "What does the Chaplain do? Does he pray for both the House and the Senate?"
"No, ma'am," replied the tour guide. "He gets up in the morning, looks at the assembled Congress, and prays for the country!"

Bad to tha BONE !

A few Virginia boys were up in the Blue Ridge hang gliding one day when a couple of yankees came along.
"What are youse guys doing," they asked.
"Hang gliding," replied one of the Southern boys.
"Want to give it a try."
"Well maybe... but I've never done it before," volunteered one of the yankees.
The Virginians assured the yank that there was nothing to it. So they hooked him up, waited on the right wind, and off he went, sailing over the valley just as pretty as you please.
About this time a couple of good ole boys are in the valley hunting.
One of them looks up and exclaims, "Bubba, look up yonder at that thing!"
Squinting against the sunlight Bubba sees it and then lets go with a couple rounds.
"Did you get em?" asks the first hunter.
Bubba squirts out a stream of tobacco juice.
"Naw, but I made it drop that damn yankee."

Celebrateing this weekend....

Congratulations...Mark and Sherry..
Congratulations....graduation day Amanda (granddaughter)
Also her Prom .....Hope you have a great one.

Today, We get to WELCOME a new family member.

"How can you not love America?

It has all you could ever want, except a big ass fence around the border, and we're working on that."