Down Hummingbird Lane

Good Morning, Friends....
Today it will be  Sunny.
Highs in the upper 60s.
I'm reading 34º now...
Can't wait to get down to Florida
to check out the weather....
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~ Petewete consulted a foot doctor, who advised him to
put on a clean pair of socks each day for a week and then
come back. 
Petewete returned walking awkwardly. 
"Where are your shoes?" the doctor asked.
Complained Petewete, "I just couldn't get them on over
all these socks.

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~  During a pause in the service the elder leaned over
and whispered to the minister:
" Remember you were going to say something about the
high cost of living."
"I haven't forgotten it, " said the minister. 
"I'll speak of that as soon as the collection has been
taken up."

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~  Gus orders a cup of coffee and the waitress asked
"How do you like your coffee"?
he says..."I like my coffee just how I like my woman"
"She says awe how nice hot and creamy?" ...
"No...he replies...quiet"

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~  US tourists, a man and his wife are traveling in
the Middle East.
An Arab approaches the husband, saying, “I’ll give you
100 camels for your woman.”
 After a long silence, the husband says,
“She’s not for sale.”
The indignant wife says, “What took you so long to
answer?”
The husband replied, “I was trying to figure out how to
get 100 camels back home.”

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 ~  Why is Turtle Wax so expensive?
Because turtles have such tiny ears.

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~  New warning to drinkers from FDA
When you drink Vodka over ice, it can give you kidney
failure,
When you drink Rum over ice, it can give you liver failure,
When you drink whiskey over ice, it can give you heart
problems,
When you drink Gin over ice, it can give you brain
 problems.
Apparently, ice is really bad for you.

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~  Taz,... a blondes radio suddenly stops working .....
so she opens it up and finds a dead cockroach in it.....
she yells ...OMG the singer is dead....!

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~  A Sunday School teacher of preschoolers told her
students that she wanted each of them to have learned
one fact about Jesus by the next Sunday.
 The following week she asked each child in turn what
they had learned.
Susie said, "He was born in a manger."
Bobby said, "He threw the money changers out of the
temple."
Little Johnny said, "He has a red pickup truck but he
doesn't know how to drive it."
 Curious, the teacher asked, "And where did you learn
that, Johnny?"
"From my Daddy," said Johnny.
"Yesterday we were driving down the highway, and this
red pickup truck pulled out in front of us and Daddy
yelled at him, 'Jesus Christ!..... Why don't you learn how
to drive?"

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~  An obviously overweight member of the health club
was asked to detail his daily routine. 
"I eat moderately, I exercise moderately,
and I drink moderately." he explained.
"Is there anything else you'd care to add,"
asked the manager. 
"Yes," he answered........ "I lie extensively."

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Todays Thought:

* Don't rule out working with your hands.
 It does not preclude using your head.  - Andy Rooney

Rae's Trivia.....

Abraham Lincoln married Mary Todd in 1842. 
Mary came from a distinguished Kentucky family. 
She met Lincoln, then a country lawyer, when she
moved from Kentucky to Springfield, Illinois to live with
her oldest sister, Elizabeth. 
Mary was a lively woman, oftentimes volatile, while
Lincoln was more reserved and lacked the social graces
that Mary had. 
They bore fours sons, but only Robert lived into
adulthood.

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