Today, Mostly cloudy.
A slight chance of showers
Highs in the mid 60s.
East winds 5 to 10 mph.
Chance of rain 20 percent.
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Story of my life.....
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Don't worry...I want my fingers.........
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So thats why my grocery bill is so high.
I wondered where that chicken breast went to....
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He's cool, Huh..
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A crabby banana??
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Run, Run.....
He's right behind you.....
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Play it again, Sam.....
I can't figure them out......
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Get your Lazy butt up......
There is mouses to catch.....
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Gotta go... Got someone waiting for me...
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♥♥♥
~ Top Ten Things A Cat Thinks About...
I could have sworn I heard a can opener.
Is there something I'm not getting when humans make
noise with their mouths?
Why doesn't the government do something about dogs?
I wonder if Morris really liked 9-lives, or did he have
ULTERIOR motives?
Hmmmm.... If dogs serve humans, and humans serve
cats, why can't we ever get those STUPID dogs to do
anything for us?
This looks like a good spot for a nap.Hey - no kidding,
I'm sure that's the can opener.
Would humans have built a vast and complex civilisation
of their own if we cats hadn't given them a reason to
invent sofas and can openers in the first place.
If there's a God, how can He allow neutering?
If that really was the can opener, I'll play finicky just to
let THEM know who's boss !!
I could have sworn I heard a can opener.
Is there something I'm not getting when humans make
noise with their mouths?
Why doesn't the government do something about dogs?
I wonder if Morris really liked 9-lives, or did he have
ULTERIOR motives?
Hmmmm.... If dogs serve humans, and humans serve
cats, why can't we ever get those STUPID dogs to do
anything for us?
This looks like a good spot for a nap.Hey - no kidding,
I'm sure that's the can opener.
Would humans have built a vast and complex civilisation
of their own if we cats hadn't given them a reason to
invent sofas and can openers in the first place.
If there's a God, how can He allow neutering?
If that really was the can opener, I'll play finicky just to
let THEM know who's boss !!
☼
~ 3 men were in a bar when one said
"I once ate a dodgy curry in India and was sick for 3
months".
The 2nd man said "That's nothing... I ate some rice in
Africa and was sick for 9 months".
The 3rd man laughs at them and says "I ate something
35 years ago and i'm still suffering now!".
The first 2 men asked what it was.....
To which he replied "Wedding cake".
"I once ate a dodgy curry in India and was sick for 3
months".
The 2nd man said "That's nothing... I ate some rice in
Africa and was sick for 9 months".
The 3rd man laughs at them and says "I ate something
35 years ago and i'm still suffering now!".
The first 2 men asked what it was.....
To which he replied "Wedding cake".
☼
~ Two male flies are buzzing around, cruising for good
looking females.
One spots a real cutie sitting on a pile of cow dung and
dives down toward her.
"Pardon me" he asks, turning on his best charm, "
...but is this stool taken?"
looking females.
One spots a real cutie sitting on a pile of cow dung and
dives down toward her.
"Pardon me" he asks, turning on his best charm, "
...but is this stool taken?"
☼
~ "It was just a simple misunderstanding, your Honor," testified the man charged with indecent exposure.
"Explain that statement!" demanded the Judge.
"Well, you see, this girl and I were drinking in a bar and
she asked me what I wanted most in a woman --
so I showed her."
"Explain that statement!" demanded the Judge.
"Well, you see, this girl and I were drinking in a bar and
she asked me what I wanted most in a woman --
so I showed her."
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~ Mother: "Why are you home from school so early?"
Son: "I was the only one who could answer a question."
Mother: "Oh, really? What was the question?"
Son: "Who threw the eraser at the principal?"
~ Mother: "Why are you home from school so early?"
Son: "I was the only one who could answer a question."
Mother: "Oh, really? What was the question?"
Son: "Who threw the eraser at the principal?"
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~ Have faith...
A climber fell off a cliff, and as he tumbled down,
he caught hold of a small branch wedged in the rock.
"HELP! IS THERE ANYBODY UP THERE?" he shouted.
A majestic voice boomed through the gorge:
"I will help you, my son, but first you must have faith in
me."
"Yes, yes, I trust you!" cried the man.
"Let go of the branch," boomed the voice.
There was a long pause, and the man shouted up again,
"IS THERE ANYONE ELSE UP THERE I COULD TALK TO?"
A climber fell off a cliff, and as he tumbled down,
he caught hold of a small branch wedged in the rock.
"HELP! IS THERE ANYBODY UP THERE?" he shouted.
A majestic voice boomed through the gorge:
"I will help you, my son, but first you must have faith in
me."
"Yes, yes, I trust you!" cried the man.
"Let go of the branch," boomed the voice.
There was a long pause, and the man shouted up again,
"IS THERE ANYONE ELSE UP THERE I COULD TALK TO?"
☼
~ After being nicked twice by his barber's razor,
a man asked for a glass of water.
"Sorry, sir," said the barber.
"Did I get hair in your mouth?"
" No, I want to see if my neck leaks!"
~ After being nicked twice by his barber's razor,
a man asked for a glass of water.
"Sorry, sir," said the barber.
"Did I get hair in your mouth?"
" No, I want to see if my neck leaks!"
☼
~ Lunching with a friend in a fast-food restaurant,
I was telling her about a teenager who had rear-ended
my car.
The teen blamed me for the accident.
“She even called me every dirty name in the book!”
I said.
Just then I looked over to the next table where two
nine-year-old boys had apparently been paying close
attention to my story.
One said to the other, “There’s a book?”
I was telling her about a teenager who had rear-ended
my car.
The teen blamed me for the accident.
“She even called me every dirty name in the book!”
I said.
Just then I looked over to the next table where two
nine-year-old boys had apparently been paying close
attention to my story.
One said to the other, “There’s a book?”
☼
* One night after dinner my family decided to go for a
walk, and I asked my husband if I looked okay.
He replied, "You look great, honey.
Besides, it's going to be dark soon."
walk, and I asked my husband if I looked okay.
He replied, "You look great, honey.
Besides, it's going to be dark soon."
☼
~ A New York City yuppie moved to the country and
bought a piece of land.
He went to the local feed and livestock store and talked
to the proprietor about how he was going to take up
chicken farming.
He then asked to buy 100 chicks.
"That's a lot of chicks," commented the proprietor.
"I mean business," the city slicker replied.
A week later the yuppie was back again.
"I need another 100 chicks," he said. "
Boy, you are serious about this chicken farming,"
the man told him.
"Yeah," the yuppie replied.
"If I can iron out a few problems."
"Problems?" asked the proprietor.
"Yeah," replied the yuppie, "I think I planted that last
batch too close together."
bought a piece of land.
He went to the local feed and livestock store and talked
to the proprietor about how he was going to take up
chicken farming.
He then asked to buy 100 chicks.
"That's a lot of chicks," commented the proprietor.
"I mean business," the city slicker replied.
A week later the yuppie was back again.
"I need another 100 chicks," he said. "
Boy, you are serious about this chicken farming,"
the man told him.
"Yeah," the yuppie replied.
"If I can iron out a few problems."
"Problems?" asked the proprietor.
"Yeah," replied the yuppie, "I think I planted that last
batch too close together."
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Todays Thought:
"We don't see things as they are, we see them as we
are." - Anais Nin
are." - Anais Nin
Rae's Trivia......
The lungs of an average adult, unfolded and flattened
out, would cover an area the size of a tennis court.
out, would cover an area the size of a tennis court.
And
Rod Stewart worked as a coffin polisher before his
incredible recording career took off.
incredible recording career took off.
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