mountain....ha-ha...
partly sunny with some rain... today.
☼
Care for a BLT??
Pete... Buffet this morning......
I'm gonna eat all the biscuit and gravy.......
☼
Oh, No, are you gonna eat all the Beacon??
☼
What are you doing?
Hiding from your bath??
no beacon for you......
☼
I don't know, what tiz.......
☼
Loud and clear.......
You sceared the kitty......
☼
Man, thats some set of brakes....
☼
Ready to go swimming in the pond??
You gotta waint until after feeding time......
☼
Yes, I see plenty yellowjackets..
around the Hummers feeders....
☼
What you want me to walk that far??
☼
Well, I gotta go and have my
Strawberry pie......and I'm not sharing....
☼
☼
♥♥♥
~ Sue said; I had trouble with the idea of turning 50
and was oversensitive to any signs of advancing age.
When I found a prominent gray hair in my bangs,
I pointed to my forehead and asked my husband,
“Oh no, have you seen this?”
“What?” he asked. “The wrinkles?”
and was oversensitive to any signs of advancing age.
When I found a prominent gray hair in my bangs,
I pointed to my forehead and asked my husband,
“Oh no, have you seen this?”
“What?” he asked. “The wrinkles?”
☼
~ A Mormon acquaintance once pushed Mark Twain
into an argument on the issue of polygamy.
After long and tedious expositions justifying the practice,
the Mormon demanded that Twain cite any passage of
scripture expressly forbidding polygamy.
"Nothing easier," Twain replied.
"No man can serve two masters."
into an argument on the issue of polygamy.
After long and tedious expositions justifying the practice,
the Mormon demanded that Twain cite any passage of
scripture expressly forbidding polygamy.
"Nothing easier," Twain replied.
"No man can serve two masters."
☼
~ Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a
magnifying glass........
At night.
magnifying glass........
At night.
☼
~ My dad is retired now, and he moved to Florida.
And its really great to be able to finally go down and
visit him now that hes finally able to do those things in
life that hes always wanted to do, which apparently is
start drinking at noon and then head on out to buy me
ugly shirts.
And its really great to be able to finally go down and
visit him now that hes finally able to do those things in
life that hes always wanted to do, which apparently is
start drinking at noon and then head on out to buy me
ugly shirts.
☼
~ The manager of a large office noticed a new man one
day and told him to come into his office.
"What is your name?" was the first thing the manager
asked the new guy.
"John," the new guy replied.
The manager scowled, "Look, I don't know what kind of
a namby-pamby place you worked at before, but I don't
call anyone by his first name.
It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in
authority.
I refer to my employees by their last name only - Smith,
Jones, Baker - that's all.
I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson.
Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?"
The new guy sighed and said, "Darling.
My name is John Darling."
"Okay, John, the next thing I want to tell you is..."
day and told him to come into his office.
"What is your name?" was the first thing the manager
asked the new guy.
"John," the new guy replied.
The manager scowled, "Look, I don't know what kind of
a namby-pamby place you worked at before, but I don't
call anyone by his first name.
It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in
authority.
I refer to my employees by their last name only - Smith,
Jones, Baker - that's all.
I am to be referred to only as Mr. Robertson.
Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?"
The new guy sighed and said, "Darling.
My name is John Darling."
"Okay, John, the next thing I want to tell you is..."
☼
~ A number of new Air-Force recruits were being taken
on their first training flight.
The plane had just leveled out after taking off when one
of the engines seized up, and another began smoking
badly.
Adjusting his parachute, the instructor strove for
nonchalance as he made his way to the hatch door.
"Now I want you men to keep perfectly calm," he said,
"while I go for help."
on their first training flight.
The plane had just leveled out after taking off when one
of the engines seized up, and another began smoking
badly.
Adjusting his parachute, the instructor strove for
nonchalance as he made his way to the hatch door.
"Now I want you men to keep perfectly calm," he said,
"while I go for help."
☼
~ Why I'm A Couch Potato......
1. If walking/cycling is good for your health, the postman
would be immortal.
2. A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water
and is fat.
3. A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years.
4. A tortoise doesn't run, barely walks & does
nothing...yet lives for 450 years.
And you want me to Exercise!!
1. If walking/cycling is good for your health, the postman
would be immortal.
2. A whale swims all day, only eats fish, drinks water
and is fat.
3. A rabbit runs and hops and only lives 15 years.
4. A tortoise doesn't run, barely walks & does
nothing...yet lives for 450 years.
And you want me to Exercise!!
☼
~ "It's no good," Tom said to his English teacher.
"I try to learn, but everything you say goes in both ears
and out the other."
"Goes in both ears and out the other?" the teacher
asked..... "But you only have two ears, boy!"
"Guess I'm no good at math, either!"
"I try to learn, but everything you say goes in both ears
and out the other."
"Goes in both ears and out the other?" the teacher
asked..... "But you only have two ears, boy!"
"Guess I'm no good at math, either!"
☼
~ Life is filled with momentary pleasures;
the sting of a good shower waking us up;
the transient scent of a flower.
Let us never get too busy to notice the simple pleasures
in our lives.
the sting of a good shower waking us up;
the transient scent of a flower.
Let us never get too busy to notice the simple pleasures
in our lives.
☼
~ Coroners refer to dead people as "ABC's".
Already Been Chucked.
Already Been Chucked.
☼
☼
Todays Thought;
"You are never too old to set another goal or to dream
a new dream." - C.S. Lewis
a new dream." - C.S. Lewis
Rae's Trivia....
The typical woman living in seventeenth-century
America gave birth to 13 youngsters.
Benjamin Franklin, born in 1706, was his mom’s
16th kid.
America gave birth to 13 youngsters.
Benjamin Franklin, born in 1706, was his mom’s
16th kid.
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