A little chilly this morning..
Got the heat on..... the soap box....
Petewete....got you a new weather thingee..check it out..
☼
Yesterday's Sunrise....
☼
A new great painting from "CAROL"
Boy! she is GOOD....
☼
Yeah, their yours now.. you done bit it...
You an't right!!
☼
He said: "It is a bed, right?"
Yeah, but not a Dogs bed...a flower bed....Bubba.
☼
I believe Cats can sleep anywere....
Super Man?? you wanna fight HUH!
☼
Instead of fighting... lets watch the race??
☼
Cat's Like Boxes...any kind!
☼
Now... You know that's gotta leave a mark...
I hurts just looking at it......
☼
What can you say??
Still spending.......
☼
I'll leave with this one.....
☼
☼
♥♥♥
~~ Two grandmas talking about teenage grandsons.
What does your grandson wants to become?
Veterinarian, and yours?
I am not sure , a doctor or a pilot.
How come?
Well, every time I enter his room I see
syringes around and he says to me:
"Look granma, I am flying"
☼
~~ We know you’d never do it, but some people concoct
crazy stories so they can skip work.
Here are a few, collected by hiring managers:
• Employee said a chicken attacked his mom.
• Employee had a hair transplant that went bad.
• Employee called in sick from a bar at 5 p.m. the night
before.
• Employee had to mow the lawn to avoid a lawsuit from
the homeowners’ association.
• Employee’s finger was stuck in a bowling ball.
• Employee fell asleep at his desk while at work and hit
his head, causing a neck injury.
☼
~~ When a Middletown, New Jersey, police officer retired,
he cited low morale.
But he didn’t leave quietly.
While walking the beat on his last day, he wrote 14 tickets
for expired inspection stickers … all to police patrol cars.
☼
~~ Congress is debating a kill switch that would allow
President Obama to freeze all activity on the internet if
there was a national emergency.
The kill switch goes by the top-secret code name
'Microsoft Windows'.
☼
~~ A couple of young tourists are pulled over by a highway
patrolman.
The officer walks up, asks for the driver's license and
registration, and when he doesn't get it quickly enough,
whacks the driver in the head.
"That's for not having your driver's license ready," he snaps.
"I ain't got all day."
After he issues the driver a ticket, the patrolman walks
around to the other side of the car and whacks the
passenger in the head.
"Owwww!" hollers the passenger.
"What'd you do that for?"
"That's to make your dream come true," replied the cop.
"I know that when you'd gotten a half-mile down the road,
you were gonna say to your friend here,
'Wish he'd tried that with me!'"
☼
~~ A man was recently flying to New York.
He decided to strike up a conversation with his seat mate.
"I've got a great policeman joke.
Would you like to hear it?"
"I should let you know first that I am a policeman."
"That's OK. I'll tell it really slow!"
☼
~~ The Los Angeles Police Department (LAPD),
The FBI, and the CIA are all trying to prove that they are the
best at apprehending criminals.
The President decides to give them a test.
He releases a rabbit into a forest and each of them has to
catch it.
The CIA goes in.
They place animal informants throughout the forest.
They question all plant and mineral witnesses.
After three months of extensive investigations they conclude
that rabbits do not exist.
The FBI goes in.
After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest,
killing everything in it, including the rabbit,
and they make no apologies.
The rabbit had it coming.
The LAPD goes in.
They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear.
The bear is yelling: "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!"
☼
~~ "When I saw you driving down the road, I guessed 55
at least."
"You're wrong, officer, it's only my hat that makes me look
that old."
☼
~~ A policeman stops a lady and asks for her license.
He says "Lady, it says here that you should be wearing
glasses."
The woman answered "Well, I have contacts."
The policeman replied "I don't care who you know!
You're getting a ticket!"
☼
~~ My father, an Air Force Academy graduate, still retains
a strict military code of ethics as well as a quick wit.
One day I mentioned that I was thinking about getting my
bellybutton pierced.
"No way!" my father fired back.
"This is an Air Force family --
no navel destroyers are allowed!"
☼
☼
Todays Thought: They must find it difficult ...Those who have taken authority as the truth,Rather than truth as the authority.
Rae's Trivia: Abraham Lincoln was the first president to ever be photographed at his inauguration.
In the photo, he is standing near John Wilkes Booth, his future assassin. -
▼~~~~~~~~~~~~<(º¿º)>~~~~~~~~~~~▼
No comments:
Post a Comment