Down Hummingbird Lane

Good Morning, Friends.....
My temperature gouge must be broke...
36º degrees this morning....only in the 40's
today... seems the storms are lined up... to hit us.
☼

Somebody feed the dog.....

☼

Trip to the paint store ended in disaster 

☼

Must be dreaming....

☼

I don't know....he's having fun......

☼

My what a big baby...

☼

Wahooo a flying dog?

☺

Sez he smells something...and it's rotten....

☼

So that's what it were.......

Somebody ain't right.....

☺

Yep, cought you red handed....

☼

No...it's bad for your teeth...

You wanna look like grampaw??

☼

And I thought I get alot.....

☼

Well, I fixed It...now I can take a nap.....

☼

☼

♥♥♥

~~ A boy came home from school and told his mom he hadbeen given a part in the school play.

"Wonderful," his mom says, "What part is it?"
The boy says "I play the part of the husband!"
The mother scowls and says "Go back and tell your teacher
you want a speaking part."

☼

~~ The Government has issued a travel warning due to the
cold weather.
They suggest that anyone travelling in the current icy
conditions should make sure they have the following:
Shovel
Blankets or sleeping bag
Extra clothing including hat and gloves
24 hours worth of food
De-Icer
Rock Salt
Flashlight with spare batteries
Road Flares or Reflective Triangles
Empty gas Can
First Aid Kit
Booster cables .........
I looked like an idiot on the bus this morning!

☼
~~ Worried woman: 'Doctor, I think I'm pregnant.'
Doctor: 'But I gave you the Pill.'
Worried woman: 'Yes, I know. But it keeps falling out.'

☼

~~ Philadelphia 76ers star Charles Barkley was once asked
why he had chosen to play college basketball at Auburn.
"When I was recruited at Auburn," he explained,
"they took me to a strip joint.
When I saw those breasts on Buffy, I knew that Auburn met
my academic requirements!"

☼

~~ I was the substitute teacher for a second-grade math
class that was learning about groups.
In one exercise, pupils were asked to label a group of items
according to their common characteristics.
Pictured were onion rings, doughnuts, a bundt cake,
and ring cookies.
The correct answer would have been that all the items
have holes in the center.
But one health-conscious girls's response was,
"All of those things contain too much cholesterol."

☼

~~ Sherlock Holmes turned to Dr. Watson and announced.
"The murderer lives in the house with the yellow door."
"Good grief Holmes, said Watson.
"How on earth did you figure that out?"
"It's a lemon-entry, my dear Watson."

☼

~~  Over the years, my husband and I have usually managed
to decode the cute but confusing gender signs sometimes put
on restaurant restroom doors (Buoys and Gulls, Laddies and Lassies,
etc.), but every so often we get stumped.
Recently my husband wandered off in search of the men's room
and found himself confronted by two marked doors.
One was labeled "Bronco," and the other was designated "Cactus."
Completely baffled, he stopped a restaurant employee passing by.
"Excuse me.
I need to use the restroom," he said.
Gesturing toward the doors, he asked, "Which one should I use?"
"Actually, we would prefer you to go there," the employee said,
pointing to a door down the hall marked "Men."
"Bronco and Cactus are private dining rooms."

☼

~~ Nurse: "Doctor, the man you just gave a clean bill of
health to dropped dead right as he was leaving the office".
Doctor: "Turn him around, make it look like he was walking
in."

☼
~~ At his 103rd birthday party, my grandfather was asked
if he planned to be around for his 104th.
"I certainly do," he replied.
"Statistics show that very few people die between the
ages of 103 and 104."

☼
~~ Jim was just out of Navy boot camp, and was on his
first ship.
About two hours out of port, he began to get a bit ill from
the motion of the ship.
He approached an ensign, also just out of training and on
his first cruise.
He saluted and said, "Excuse me sir, I am feeling seasick,
and I wondered if I may have permission to go downstairs
to the dispensary."
The ensign returned his salute and replied, "Sailor, you
are in the Navy now.
You don't go downstairs, you go below!
There is no dispensary on this ship, there is sickbay.
Not only that, that is not the floor, it is a deck, that is
not the ceiling, it is the overhead, that is not a pillar,
it is a stanchion, that is not a water fountain,
it is a scuttle- butt.
If I ever hear you using civilian words
instead of Naval jargon, I will throw you out of that
little round window over there!"

☼
~~ MARY: I've been asked to get married lots of times.
RHONDA: Who asked you?
MARY: Mom and Dad. Lots of times.

☼
☼
Todays Thought: "Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter.--Martin Luther King, Jr.
 
 
Rae's Trivia:  How much can a guy bench-press?

The average male adult can bench-press 88 percent of his
body weight, having 70 to 80 pounds of muscle.