to be the high today..... Anyway.... It's gonna get colder..
this week......
You think the critter likes Bacon??
Mom sez; Don't feed the animals at the table...
☼
My breakfast?? you kidding me??
☼
"You get the ants outta my house??
we'll shake on it.....
☼
Walls taste good.....??
☼
Get back here, I'm not finished with your bath.....
☼
Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello, Hello and Hello......
☼
Looks more like someone cried "Bath Time !!!"
☼
Look Out!! hes dangrous......
☼
My Man Eno........
☼
My old car has the latest gadgets.......
☼
Well time to train surf......
See you tomorrow....
☼
☼
♥♥♥
~~ In the coming new year, both Groundhog Day and the State of the Union address will occur on the same day.
It is an ironic juxtaposition of events: one involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to an
insignificant creature of little intelligence for prognostication,
while the other involves a groundhog.
☼
~~ Pete has gotten that dreaded furniture disease...
that's when your chest is falling into your drawers.
☼
~~ WalMart is now considering selling wine from vending
machines.
As a precaution, the machine requires that you swipe your
drivers license first.
If you're buying wine from a vending machine,
what are the odds you still have a drivers license?
☼
~~ I went to the doctor's the other day and I said,
'Have you got anything for wind?'
So he gave me a kite.
☼
~~ Tony was a smooth operator, and at the Golf Club's
annual dance he attached himself to the prettiest lady golfer
in the room and began boasting to her.'You know,' said Tony, 'they're all afraid to play me.
What do you think my handicap is?'
'Well, where do you want me to start, Tony?' Came her quick
response.
☼
~~ I'm on a whiskey diet..... I've lost three days already.
~~ Peteweet always slept with his gun under his pillow.
Hearing a noise at the foot of the bed, he shot off his big toe.
'Thank the Lord I wasn't sleeping at the other end of the bed,'
Peteweet said to his friends at the beer joint.
'I would have blown my head off.'
☼
~~ Don't run over Holiday shoppers in your Mall parking lot
while looking for parking space.
The economy is already bad and we cannot afford to lose
any shoppers.
☼
~~ I was talking to one beautiful, brown-eyed five-year- old..
I noticed she was missing one of her front teeth.
I asked what had happened to the tooth.
She told me the dentist had pulled it out.
When I asked if she got any money for it,
her excited reply was, "Yes, the tooth fairy gave me $20."
I told her that when I lost my first tooth, I got only 50 cents.
She looked very concerned, and after some thought,
she offered this explanation for the discrepancy:
"Well...I'm from Beverly Hills, and maybe that makes a
difference."
☼
~~ Q: What do chefs call "Baked Alaska" in Alaska?
A: "Baked Here"
☼
~~ A fifteen-year-old boy came bounding into the house
and found his mom in bed.
He asked if she were sick or something.
He was truly concerned.
Mom replied that, as a matter of fact, she didn't feel too well.
The son replied, "Well, don't worry a bit about dinner.
I'll be happy to carry you down to the stove."
☼
☼
Todays Thought: "Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons." -- General Douglas MacArthur
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