Good morning...
A cool 32º degrees this morning...
Hope you all are comfy...
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Alright, get out of the sink, I gotta get breakfast going....
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Yeah, I waiting for my coffee...get outta there....
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Little one, your gonna be sorry.....
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Going trick or treating, are you??
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I don't want to hear it............
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Why do you always wanna take over my boxes..
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Debate away......
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A Panda Dog?? That's odd.....
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Said he's tired of all the drama, he's leaving.....
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Newest cell phone??
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Pete....wanna buy a used car...?
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♥♥♥
~~ University of Chicago researchers have found that sleeping more can help you lose weight.
How many guys are going to jump on this one? “Honey, I'm not sitting on the couch all weekend,.......
I'm dieting.”
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~~ Scene: My checkout line at the supermarket.
Me: Would you like paper or plastic?
Customer: I'd like double-bagged paper,
and I'd like you to make each bag as heavy as possible.
Me: Okay.
Customer: In case you're wondering, I had a fight with my wife,
and it's my turn to pick up the groceries.
Me: Uh-huh.
Customer: It's also her turn to unload the car.
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~~ Before I could enroll in my company's medical insurance
plan, I needed to fill out a questionnaire.
As expected, the form was very thorough, leaving nothing to
chance.
One question asked, "Do you think you may need to go to the
emergency room within the next three months?"
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~~ My wife is a by-the-recipe baker.
But that attention to detail still hasn't made her chocolate
chip cookies taste any better.
One day, after the cookies had been in the oven awhile,
I smelled a familiar odor.
"They're burning," I shouted.
"I know," she said nonchalantly.
"Aren't you going to take them out?"
"No. They still have six minutes."
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~~ In 1938, Orson Welles broadcast a radio reproduction
of H. G. Wells's War of the Worlds (which depicts a Martian
invasion).
So persuasive was Welles's delivery that the broadcast
caused a minor nation-wide panic.
Actor John Barrymore...convinced that Martians had in fact
landed...remained silent until Welles reported that the
invaders were marching down Madison Avenue.
At this point, he rushed to his kennel
(in which he kept twenty St. Bernards), flung open the gate,
released the dogs, and cried, "Fend for yourselves!"
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~~ There she stood in the line at the post office,
a line that wound its way almost out the front door.
A fellow customer spoke to the elderly lady waiting to buy
some stamps.
"Ma'am, you must be very tired.
Did you know there's a stamp machine over there in the
corner?"..... He pointed to the machine built into the wall.
"Why yes, thank you," the lady replied,
"but I'll just wait here a little while longer.
I'm getting close to the window."
The customer became insistent.
"But it would be so much easier for you to avoid this long line
and buy your stamps from the machine."
The woman patted him on the arm and answered,
"Oh, I know......
But that old machine would never ask me how my
grandchildren are doing."
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~~ My techie husband and I were walking in the high desert
when he stopped to photograph one stunning vista after
another.
Overcome by the sheer beauty, he paid it his ultimate
compliment: "Everywhere I look is a screen saver!"
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~~ After a long flight a traveler discovered his luggage was
missing, so he went to the service desk and explained that
he had arrived and his bags were not on the baggage carousel.
"To help," said the person at the desk,
"I need to know if your plane has landed yet."
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~~ During peek season the beach is covered with hundreds
of bikini- clad beauties.
☼~~ BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group discussing
why a deadline was missed or a project failed,
and who was responsible.
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~~ John: My girlfriend reminds me of a Greek statue.
Dave: You mean she's very beautiful?
John: Yeah, beautiful, but not all there.
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Todays Thought: “Words that soak into your ears are whispered…....not yelled.
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