Maybe some rain later in the week...
Pete....has the snow melted up there, yet???
☼
He's found a great breakfest...
☼
Well, he's had breakfast....now he's looking for something to drink...
☼
Good Boy.....he's your drink...."Bubba" ^^^^
☼
I guess their taking a trip.....
☼
He sez; Were is my breakfast??
☼
Rich peoples cat......
☼
Dancing? looks more like a fight, to me.....
☼
I do- I do......
Do you..?
☼
I like Eno...I think he's very funny....
☼
I'm gonna leave....if I can find the door....
☼
☼
♥♥♥
~~ As the passengers settled in on a West Coast commuter flight, a flight attendant announced,
"We'd like you folks to help us welcome our new co-pilot. He'll be performing his first commercial landing for us today,
so be sure to give him a big round of applause when
we come to a stop."
The plane made an extremely bumpy landing,
bouncing hard a few times times before smoothing out.
Still, the passengers applauded.
Then the attendant's voice came over the intercom,
"Thanks for flying with us.
And don't forget to let our co-pilot know which of his
four landings you liked best."
☼
~~ French visitors to the American republic,
even those who spoke English found they must
acquire a new indigenous and colorful vocabulary,
with words such as "eggplant and lightning bug"
It was impossible to spell this polyglot,
very pittoresque American language!"
☼
~~ Sign: In a sporting store: "Sale on tennis balls -
first come, first serve."
☼
~~ Aware that he wasn't hearing too well,
Pete went to an ear doctor.
After giving him a thorough examination,
the doctor told him that he'd have to give up
drinking or risk total deafness.
Pete left, seemingly inspired by the doctor's
admonition.
Some months passed.
The doctor happened to come out of a shop next
to a bar.
He stopped as Pete staggered out of the bar.
The doctor said, "You'll be as deaf as a post if
you don't cut this out."
Pete said, "Tell you the truth,
Doc, what I'm drinking is a heck of a lot better than
what I'm hearing!"
☼
~~ Over dinner one evening, a wife says to her husband,
"I met this horrible and rude man downtown this morning,
and right away I knew he was a troublemaker.
He started to insult me.
He used really bad language.
He even threatened me!"
"How did you meet this fellow?" her husband asked,
very concerned.
"Well," she says, "we met by accident....
I hit him with the car."
☼
~~ The young man ahead of my father at the flower shop
was taking an unusually long time to place his order.
When the clerk asked how she could help, he explained that
his girlfriend was turning 19 and he couldn't decide whether
to give her a dozen roses or 19 roses...
one for each year of her life.
The woman put aside her business judgment and advised,
"She may be your 19-year-old girlfriend now, but someday
she could be your 50-year-old wife."
The young man bought a dozen roses.
☼
~~ My Mom wants me to name my kids after people in our family.
So I'm naming my firstborn Uncle Karl.
☼
~~ Such was his distaste for extravagance that the Duke of Westminster
often had his shoes resoled long after the uppers had worn out.
Exasperated by her friend's parsimonious nature,
Coco Chanel once secretly ordered twelve pairs of shoes and had
them hidden in his wardrobe.
Some time later, she observed the duke wearing a pair of his new shoes...
and was astonished to see him (quite unaware that he was being watched)
deliberately jump into a dirty puddle to remove their offensively
extravagant shine.
☼
~~ (Asked shortly before a tour to Vietnam if he was worth
50 million dollars)
"If I had $50 million, I wouldn't go to Vietnam;
I'd send for it." (Bob Hope)
☼
~~ Two kids are talking to each other.
One says, "I'm really worried.
My dad works twelve hours a day to give me a nice home and good food.
My mom spends the whole day cleaning and cooking for me.
I'm worried sick!"
The other kid says, "What have you got to worry about?
Sounds to me like you've got it made!"
The first kid says, "What if they try to escape?"
☼
☼
Todays Thoughts; "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
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