and that guy over the mountain.......
Happy Birthday this week? (39 and holding?)
We had some rain from a storm,
but not enough to do any good...
☼
Well, the hummers were going at it hot and heavy.
They are fighting over the feeders.
It's dangerous to set on the deck....
They whiz by your head...
☼
This guy partied to much again....
☼
This one must have a cold.......
calling for a cough drop......
☼
Yeh, your mothers fat.....and your Daddy is ugly...
☼
This is the uglies Sponge Bob.........
☼
What in the heck is that? ^^^
☼
I'm sorry..... Sponge Bob is scary!
☼
Wow, talk about taking your life in your hands...
I'll leave on this one.....
☼
☼
♥♥♥
~~ Apple will now offer a free iPhone case for all iPhone users.
It’s not going to help reception, but it protects the iPhone after you throw it against the wall. ☼
~~ Pete is from the old school, where you keep your money under the mattress—only he kept his in the underwear drawer.
One day Shelly bought dad an unusual personal safe—a can of spray paint with a false bottom—so he could keep his money in the workshop.
Later she asked her Mom if he was using it.
"Oh, yes," she replied, "he put his money in it the same day."
"No burglar would think to look on the work shelf!"...I gloated.
"They won't have to," her mom replied.
"He keeps the paint can in his underwear drawer."
☼
~~ Gus and Pete were gazing at the window of a wig shop in which were displayed two small identical wigs on their stands.
"They're alike as toupees in a pod." sez Pete!"
☼
~~ Husband: I never see you overreact when we get into arguments. How do you do it?
Wife: I clean the toilet.
Husband: (laughs) You clean the toilet? how does that help?
Wife: I use your toothbrush....
☼
~~ I had just about decided to buy the television set whose attributes the young salesman had been extolling.
He concluded by saying it carried only a one-year warranty but that I could buy a five-year warranty at an additional cost.
I won’t buy anything that doesn’t carry a five-year warranty and so turned to leave.
The salesman asked me to please stay while he consulted with his boss.
"By the way," he continued, "may I ask how old you are?"
"seventy five," I replied.
He returned a moment later smiling.
"We’ll give you a lifetime warranty."
☼
~~ A skeleton walked into a bar and asked for a beer and a mop.
☼
~~ One doctor to another: "It's called an experimental drug because they don't know
whether they'll make a bundle on it yet."
☼
~~ Taz did you hear about the blond chicken farmer?
They all died when she planted them.
☼
~~ At a dinner party, a shy young fellow kept trying to think of something nice to say to the hostess,
who was sitting beside him.
At last he saw his chance when the lovely hostess turned
to him and said "What a small appetite you seem to have, Mr. Brown."
Sitting next to you," he remarked, "would cause anybody to lose his appetite."
☼
~~ How do you drown a blond?
Put a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool. ( Taz likes blond jokes..)
☼
☼
Todays Thought; "if your vision is for a year, plant wheat.
If your vision is for ten years, plant trees.
If your vision is for a lifetime, plant people."
- Chinese Proverb
◄~~~~~~~~~~~~~~^~~~~~~~~~~~~~►
2 comments:
You're wrong there Gus I don't like blonde jokes... I love them LOL
'...toupees in a pod' GROOOOOOOOOOAN
Taz x
Gus did your bday go by and we not know? Happy happy 39th. Looking good....;)Hope you had lots of cake!!Birthday Hugzs Carol
Post a Comment