Alot going on in town.......Hope it don't rain them out......
☺
These guys waiting for breakfast......
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High fives??
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It's gotta be hard......
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Maybe give them a massage??
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Ya gotta watch them penguins.....
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Wow....you look like the dog worked you over....
or did you drink too much?
☺
You didn't drink all of granny's stash, did you??
She's gunning for ya.....
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Poop too.......
What can you say??
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Looks cold too.....dummys.......
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I thought I smelled somthin......gotta go.....
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♥♥♥
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~~ Sam was telling his friend Gus,about the cruise he had taken.
He said that the cabin on the ship was nice,
but the washing machine on the wall was terrible.
"That was a porthole," his friend explained to him.
"I see," said Sam.
"No wonder I never got my clothes back."
☺
~~ An agriculture student said to Pete: “Your methods are too old
fashioned.
I won’t be surprised if this tree will give you less than twenty pounds of
apples.”
“I won’t be surprised either,” said Pete, “this is an Plum tree”.
☺
~~ How do you fix a broken pizza?
With tomato paste................
String cheese works well, too.
☺
~~ If you've travelled Ryan Air...
Let’s spare a thought for Michael O’Leary, Chief Executive of Ryanair.
Arriving in a hotel in Dublin he went to the bar and asked for a pint of
Guinness.
The barman nodded and said “that will be one Euro please,
Mr. O’Leary,”
to which Michael replied “that’s a very competitive price”
and handed over his money.
“Will you be wanting a glass with your Guinness, sir?”
enquired the barman...
☺
~~ On a drive in the country, a city slicker noticed Pete the farmer lifting
a pig up to an apple tree and holding the pig there as it ate one apple
after another.
“Maybe I don’t know what I’m talking about,” said the city slicker,
“but if you just shook the tree so the apples fell to the ground,
wouldn’t it save a lot of time?”
“Time?” said Pete......... “What does time matter to a pig?”
☺
~~ Faced with hard times, the company offered a bonus of one hundred
dollars to any employee who could come up with a way of saving money.
The bonus went to the young woman in accounting who suggested
limiting future bonuses to ten dollars.
☺
~~ The election isn't very far off when a candidate can recognize
you across the street.
☺
~~ The tiresome jury selection process continued, each side hotly
contesting and dismissing potential jurors.
John was called for his question session.
"Property holder?"
"Yes, I am, Your Honor."
"Married or single?"
"Married for years, Your Honor."
"Formed or expressed an opinion?"
"Not in many years, Your Honor."
☺
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Todays Thought: "The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in
moments of comfort and convenience,
but where he stands at times of challenge
and controversy." - Martin Luther King Jr.
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