Got a good weekend's coming.....
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I wouldn't have that... that would kill me....
But I bet my friend "Flex" could finish it off....
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Sounds familiar......
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Watch out for the "Ninja Cat".....
he's a bad Dude!
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And the fight's started........
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He won't be there all the time......
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Mom's calling us for din-din.......
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Let's go to Florida........
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Clamp down on it....
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Plane hitting the water at 200 miles an hour......
I also heard the driver got a ticket for littering in a public water way.....
not from the debris of the plane, but from the feces from his underwear
after the accident.
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Yep...a bad sign ....alright!
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♥♥♥
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~~ : Why did President Obama cross the road?
A: So he could tax the folks on the other side.
☺
~~ A dentist, after completing work on a patient, came to him begging.
Dentist: Could you help me?
Could you give out a few of your loudest, most painful screams?
Patient: Why?.... Doctor, it wasn’t all that bad this time.
Dentist: There are so many people in the waiting room right now,
and I don’t want to miss the four o clock ball game.
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~~ Q. “Gus,” asked the druggist, “did that mudpack I gave you improve
your wife’s appearance?”
A. “It did surely,” replied Gus, “but it keeps fallin’ off!”
☺
~~ A little girl arrived at kindergarten all out of breath with excitement.
"Why, what's the matter?" asked her teacher.
"We've got a new baby at our house," she replied.
"Won't you come and see it?"
"Oh thanks!" said the teacher, "but I think I had better wait until your
mother is better."
"It's all right," said the girl.
"You don't have to be afraid, it's not catching."
☺
~~ One day in school, the teacher wrote on the blackboard,
"I ain't had no fun at all last week."
She turned to her class and said, "now, what should I do to correct that?"
A shy student stood up and replied meekly,
"Maybe you should get a boyfriend."
☺
~~ One liners.....
- On the other hand, you have different fingers.
- He was lost in thought because it was unfamiliar territory.
- Nothing is really foolproof for a sufficiently talented fool.
- The latest poll finds that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population.
- "Nobody goes where the crowds are anymore. It's too crowded." - Yogi Berra
☺
~~ Sign behind an Amish carriage:
"Energy efficient vehicle. Runs on grass and oats.
CAUTION: Avoid exhaust!"
☺
~~ The room was full of pregnant women and their partners,
and the Lamaze class was in full swing.
The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly,
along with informing the men how to give the necessary assurances
at this stage of the plan.
The teacher then announced, "Ladies, exercise is good for you.
Walking is especially beneficial.
And, gentlemen, it wouldn't hurt you to take the time to go walking with
your partner!"
The room really got quiet.
Finally, a man in the middle of the group raised his hand.
"Yes?" replied the teacher.
"Is it all right if she carries a golf bag while we walk?"
☺
~~ Failing to get a response from a letter to a store's president,
a consumer wrote a second letter which began:
"Dear Computer: I realize that you are now running things and the
president is only a figurehead."
The copy he sent the president got his problem solved.
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Today's Thought: It is better to live rich than to die rich......
(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)¤(ºOº)o(ºOº)o(ºOº)(ºOº)
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