#904

Good Morning....Well it's a chilly morning.....but will warm up
into the 70's today....Weekend going good for ya?
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Yep, it's that time......

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No...No...time to hit the sack...

Looks like you had enough already....

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Oh....Noes......you look cute......

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Okay.......sleep away....

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Oh, no....how did that get in??

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This one is dead to the world, sleeping!!

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I lied.....!

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I don't know about this guy....looks funny...

reminds me of a bat.....vampire??

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Oh, Wow...look at the teeth on that bird......

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I guess it does.....

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♥♥♥

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~~ A four-year-old girl spent some time at her aunt's summer cottage.

The two of them were watching a couple of water-skiers on the lake.
The girl turned to her aunt and loudly exclaimed,
"Those people are very silly!
They are never going to catch up with that boat!"

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~~ After her first day of school, a girl's mom asked,
"What did you learn today?"
The girl replied, "Not enough, I have to go back tomorrow."

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~~ Pete wanted to know if he could have a day off with pay.
When asked why, he said, "I want to catch up on the time I missed for
coffee breaks when I was on vacation."
( Pete your missing out on the gravy and biscuits this morning....)

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~~ My memory's not as sharp as it used to be.
Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.

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~~ A young college student had stayed up all night studying for his
zoology test the next day.
As he entered the classroom, he saw ten stands with ten birds on them
with a sack over each bird and only the legs showing.
He sat right on the front row because he wanted to do the best job
possible.
The professor announced that the test would be to look at each of the
birds' legs and give the common name, habitat, genus, species, etc.
The student looked at each of the birds' legs.
They all looked the same to him.
He began to get upset.
He had stayed up all night studying and now had to identify birds by their
legs........ The more he thought about it the madder he got.
Finally, he could stand it no longer.
He went up to the professor's desk and said, "What a stupid test!
How could anyone tell the difference between birds by looking at their
legs?"
With that the student threw his test on the professor's desk and
walked to the door.
The professor was surprised.
The class was so big that he didn't know every student's name,
so as the student reached the door the professor called,
"Mister, what's your name!"
The enraged student pulled up his pants legs and said,
"You guess, buddy! You guess!

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~~ Jim buys a new telephone-answering machine with a pre-recorded
message in a man's voice, but he forgets to tell his elderly mother.
Soon after the phone is connected, it rings and Jim decides to test it
out by letting the machine answer.
After the pre-recorded message, there's a pause and the caller hangs
up without leaving any message.
The phone soon rings again, and the same thing happens.
When the phone rings for a third time, Jim hears, "Jimmy, this is your
mother, I think.
If I am, please call me."

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~~ A man and his friend meet at the club house and decide to play a
round of golf together.
The man has a little dog with him and on the first green, when the man
holes out a 20 foot putt, the little dog starts to yip and stands up on its
hind legs and walks in circles.
The friend is quite amazed at this clever trick and says,
"Wow, that dog is really talented! What does he do if you miss a putt?"
"Somersaults," says the man.
"Somersaults?!" says the friend, "That's incredible.
How many does he do?"
"Hmmm," says the man.
"That depends on how hard I kick him."

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~~ You just might be a redneck if on one side of your belt you have
camo for huntin.. and on the other side brown for church.

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~~ A priest and a nun are golfing, and the priest is up.
He swings misses and exclaims "oh my God I missed!"
The nun gives him a dirty look, but he swings again,
misses and exclaims "oh my God I missed!"
The nun stares at him and says, "If you say that one more time,
God will open up the heavens and strike you with a lightning bolt!"
So, the priest swings again and exclaims "oh my God I ........Missed!"
Suddenly a lightning bolt shoots out of the sky and strikes the nun.
All that is heard in the sky is, "Oh my God I missed"
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Todays Thought:  If a bunch of cats jump on top of each other, is it still called a dog pile?

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